Hi everyone,
Im not sure where to start really and this could be a looong story but I will make it as short as possible.
My closest friend, lets call her 'Lisa' is turning back towards a very destructive relationship.
See, Lisa used to be married to 'Paul' and the relationship was violent, abusive, controlling and manipulative, physically and emotionally. She was the classic case of a battered woman who put up with not only abuse, but him constantly cheating and having 2 babies with 2 of his ex's WHILE married to her!! The last straw finally came when she found out that another one of his ex's toddlers was his also. (honestly, he has now got 9 children to 3 different woman....that we know of....he would have had 3 others if they hadnt miscarried also!) Lisa and Paul share one daughter 'Alice'.
It was a long journey to seeing her break free from him, one which I was closely involved with and often had to rescue her and take her to womans shelters. Lisa is a Christian and does seek God in everything. Following two years of separation Lisa and Paul divorced. (in those two years he has had another baby with one of those same two ex's and has had a string of other girlfriends)
It almost seems though, like the divorce somehow switched Lisa into thinking she could be 'friends' with Paul again. She admitted to me at New Year that she still loves him just as much as ever, feels that a part of her is missing without him, and wishes he would turn back to God so they could be together again!! (he did follow God briefly).
It used to be that Lisa would drive over and drop Alice off to see her Dad and then go away and come back a few hours later. Now Lisa is staying for coffee, for hours at a time!! Paul is in a relationship and living with another woman too! Knowing how much she still feels for him, how much of her self esteem is in his hands, knowing how weak she is....it scares me that she would possibly go back there again!
Lisa lives with her brother 'Alex'. Alex and I have been talking and both of us are very worried that this behaviour will lead her back to Paul, or they will sleep together, or worse. All of her family are worried. I cant help but feel angry cos doesnt she remember what he did to her! How can she forget the hospital visits....the fear....the control. I know I cant judge, I have never been in her shoes, but it really hurts those of us (especially her family) who have to sit by and watch her torment herself by going back to him. He will be LOVING stringing her along, playing with her emotions and taking advantage again.
So ..... I am here asking for prayer for this whole situation because I have nowhere else to turn! I cannot get others praying as I live in a small town and cannot disclose this. Please pray that the Holy Spirit would convict Lisa and show her his true colours, but more than that, that he will help her to not rely on Paul for her self worth and he would confirm to her to stay away. Pray for Alex and the rest of her family as they try to be an influence in Lisa's life, pray God will help them to not be influenced by their anger towards Paul for all he has put Lisa through already, pray for their wisdom and discernment as they talk to Lisa. Lastly please pray for me and Lisa's other close friends who have endured this road with her. I need Gods wisdom and guidance like never before! Right now I feel like shaking her and saying 'are you crazy, snap out of it, he abused you' but I know that is my frustration speaking. It weighs heavy on my mind and I need to give it all to God. I just soooo desperately dont want to see her return to him again! He will destroy her all over again, cos he hasnt changed.
Anyway, Im so sorry for this novel!! Thank you to those who read this right to the end. Thank you for praying, I really truly appreciate it. I will keep in touch with any developments.
Im not sure where to start really and this could be a looong story but I will make it as short as possible.
My closest friend, lets call her 'Lisa' is turning back towards a very destructive relationship.
See, Lisa used to be married to 'Paul' and the relationship was violent, abusive, controlling and manipulative, physically and emotionally. She was the classic case of a battered woman who put up with not only abuse, but him constantly cheating and having 2 babies with 2 of his ex's WHILE married to her!! The last straw finally came when she found out that another one of his ex's toddlers was his also. (honestly, he has now got 9 children to 3 different woman....that we know of....he would have had 3 others if they hadnt miscarried also!) Lisa and Paul share one daughter 'Alice'.
It was a long journey to seeing her break free from him, one which I was closely involved with and often had to rescue her and take her to womans shelters. Lisa is a Christian and does seek God in everything. Following two years of separation Lisa and Paul divorced. (in those two years he has had another baby with one of those same two ex's and has had a string of other girlfriends)
It almost seems though, like the divorce somehow switched Lisa into thinking she could be 'friends' with Paul again. She admitted to me at New Year that she still loves him just as much as ever, feels that a part of her is missing without him, and wishes he would turn back to God so they could be together again!! (he did follow God briefly).
It used to be that Lisa would drive over and drop Alice off to see her Dad and then go away and come back a few hours later. Now Lisa is staying for coffee, for hours at a time!! Paul is in a relationship and living with another woman too! Knowing how much she still feels for him, how much of her self esteem is in his hands, knowing how weak she is....it scares me that she would possibly go back there again!
Lisa lives with her brother 'Alex'. Alex and I have been talking and both of us are very worried that this behaviour will lead her back to Paul, or they will sleep together, or worse. All of her family are worried. I cant help but feel angry cos doesnt she remember what he did to her! How can she forget the hospital visits....the fear....the control. I know I cant judge, I have never been in her shoes, but it really hurts those of us (especially her family) who have to sit by and watch her torment herself by going back to him. He will be LOVING stringing her along, playing with her emotions and taking advantage again.
So ..... I am here asking for prayer for this whole situation because I have nowhere else to turn! I cannot get others praying as I live in a small town and cannot disclose this. Please pray that the Holy Spirit would convict Lisa and show her his true colours, but more than that, that he will help her to not rely on Paul for her self worth and he would confirm to her to stay away. Pray for Alex and the rest of her family as they try to be an influence in Lisa's life, pray God will help them to not be influenced by their anger towards Paul for all he has put Lisa through already, pray for their wisdom and discernment as they talk to Lisa. Lastly please pray for me and Lisa's other close friends who have endured this road with her. I need Gods wisdom and guidance like never before! Right now I feel like shaking her and saying 'are you crazy, snap out of it, he abused you' but I know that is my frustration speaking. It weighs heavy on my mind and I need to give it all to God. I just soooo desperately dont want to see her return to him again! He will destroy her all over again, cos he hasnt changed.
Anyway, Im so sorry for this novel!! Thank you to those who read this right to the end. Thank you for praying, I really truly appreciate it. I will keep in touch with any developments.
