Dreaming

  • Thread starter Thread starter Galatea
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Galatea

Guest
If I am sleeping, do not wake me
In my slumber, you are there
If I wake and find you leaving
like a vapor, a mist dissolved in air-
My desolation would undo me,
Do not wake me, if you love me-
Let me stay inside my dream
I do not want upon awakening,
to stare into my abyss of despair.
While I'm sleeping you are with me

In my dreaming, you are there.
 
Very nicely written. :) Sometimes dreams can be better than reality. ;) Especially the dreams where you can experience most of the things you'd like to experience, in a good way. Although; Often most dreams are rather strange, I think.
 
MorningFlower said:
Very nicely written. :) Sometimes dreams can be better than reality. ;) Especially the dreams where you can experience most of the things you'd like to experience, in a good way. Although; Often most dreams are rather strange, I think.
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Yes, my dream is strange but much better than the reality of him not being there. The song "In Dreams" by Roy Orbison inspired it. The poem is not as good as his song, I messed up the rhythm a little on a couple lines. I should have polished it before posting, but was in a frenzy, so posted without thinking. That has become my motif, I do believe. Post first, think later. :)
 
Galatea said:
Yes, my dream is strange but much better than the reality of him not being there. The song "In Dreams" by Roy Orbison inspired it. The poem is not as good as his song, I messed up the rhythm a little on a couple lines. I should have polished it before posting, but was in a frenzy, so posted without thinking. That has become my motif, I do believe. Post first, think later. :)
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Who are you dreaming about? Not so sure about whether it is about a man or God, have had both options in mind. I think you have written a very nice poem, whilst Roy Orbison have written a song, so these are two different things. ;)

Haha! "Post first, think later!" :)
 
MorningFlower said:
Who are you dreaming about? Not so sure about whether it is about a man or God, have had both options in mind. I think you have written a very nice poem, whilst Roy Orbison have written a song, so these are two different things. ;)

Haha! "Post first, think later!" :)
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It is a man, who I love. God never leaves nor forsakes. So- no worries on that score.
 
It was beautifully written, and this I seldom think, the rhythm caught your feelings red handed and the frenzy turned your creativity loose.
 
Jennie-Mae said:
It was beautifully written, and this I seldom think, the rhythm caught your feelings red handed and the frenzy turned your creativity loose.
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Thank you, I'm better at prose than poetry. I got so immersed in college trying to write blank verse, it took me forever to write even a small poem. And even to me, they sounded juvenile- after all that effort. I gave it up pretty much after college. I don't think I have written a real poem in 15 years.
 
Galatea said:
It is a man, who I love. God never leaves nor forsakes. So- no worries on that score.
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Okay. :) True about the last part you wrote, about God.

Galatea said:
Thank you, I'm better at prose than poetry. I got so immersed in college trying to write blank verse, it took me forever to write even a small poem. And even to me, they sounded juvenile- after all that effort. I gave it up pretty much after college. I don't think I have written a real poem in 15 years.
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poems can be written more simple than that, can also be to just express what you think and feel. :)
 
MorningFlower said:
Okay. :) True about the last part you wrote, about God.



poems can be written more simple than that, can also be to just express what you think and feel. :)
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I realized I should have written "whom I love". My grammar is not always perfect, I fear.

Yes, that is the wonder of God. I don't know how He puts up with the lot of us, to be honest.

I know, but I like structure and form and admire it more than free style poetry.
 
Galatea said:
I know, but I like structure and form and admire it more than free style poetry.
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Maybe you just prefer having some more challenges given to you within the written form in poetry? It is also nice to feel like having some challenges every now and then. :) I think you did very well, though... with writing this poem.
 
MorningFlower said:
Maybe you just prefer having some more challenges given to you within the written form in poetry? It is also nice to feel like having some challenges every now and then. :) I think you did very well, though... with writing this poem.
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Thank you very much. I am no Dusty or Magenta. Those two are the best poets on the site, I do believe. You're not shabby at writing, yourself.
 
Galatea said:
Thank you, I'm better at prose than poetry. I got so immersed in college trying to write blank verse, it took me forever to write even a small poem. And even to me, they sounded juvenile- after all that effort. I gave it up pretty much after college. I don't think I have written a real poem in 15 years.
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Are you writing novels? Sometimes I really wish I was able to create both poetry and poems, but the good Lord didn't find it suitable for me. Also it's a problem that I'm sort of in between two completely different languages, which takes a toll on the ability to express myself using either of them.
 
Jennie-Mae said:
Are you writing novels? Sometimes I really wish I was able to create both poetry and poems, but the good Lord didn't find it suitable for me. Also it's a problem that I'm sort of in between two completely different languages, which takes a toll on the ability to express myself using either of them.
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No, I'm not writing. I fancied myself a writer- but realized I was mediocre, so didn't pursue it. I started writing novels and have ideas for them- but never buckled down and put the nose to the grindstone. I think I found out that I'd rather not publish than be mediocre.
 
MorningFlower said:
Who are you dreaming about? Not so sure about whether it is about a man or God, have had both options in mind.
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I think..thats one thing about...poems and songs.

Because they're so metaphorical...they could be viewed in completely different ways...yet, send just as much of an "impact" to each viewer ^^

Good job ^^
 
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