A really good book dealing with relationships is "Boundaries" by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend.
I think it's instructive for EVERYBODY but especially people involved in abusive relationships.
P.38:
Emotional Distance
"Emotional distance is a temporary boundary to give your heart the space it needs to be safe; it is never a permanent way of living. People who have been in abusive relationships need to find a safe place to begin to 'thaw out' emotionally. Sometimes in abusive marriages the abused spouse needs to keep emotional distance until the abusive partner begins to face his or her problems and become trustworthy"
P. 39 : talks about the need for a support group for the abused person ..."Their support system is giving them the strength to say no to abuse and control [maybe] for the first time in their lives."....This support group is important because "your most basic need in life is for relationship"....and a "fear of being alone keeps many in hurtful patterns for years"
These guys are really wise
I think it's instructive for EVERYBODY but especially people involved in abusive relationships.
P.38:
Emotional Distance
"Emotional distance is a temporary boundary to give your heart the space it needs to be safe; it is never a permanent way of living. People who have been in abusive relationships need to find a safe place to begin to 'thaw out' emotionally. Sometimes in abusive marriages the abused spouse needs to keep emotional distance until the abusive partner begins to face his or her problems and become trustworthy"
P. 39 : talks about the need for a support group for the abused person ..."Their support system is giving them the strength to say no to abuse and control [maybe] for the first time in their lives."....This support group is important because "your most basic need in life is for relationship"....and a "fear of being alone keeps many in hurtful patterns for years"
These guys are really wise