Forgiveness for Adultery: Why is it so difficult?

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Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
25,009
8,213
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#21
BTW The Crown is fictional, but anyone living in the world today probably knows about all the real life drama of the British royal family, its played out for all to see, whether we like it or not!

In the US it was the Monica Lewinsky scandal, I dont know if she ever gained back her reputation, but people seemd to forgive Bill Clinton for just being a man?! He was impeached wasnt he though, and his wife is now still in politics I hear. I dont know how her daughter fared.

The US presidents are all supoosedly meant to be christians (for some its the basis of their politics) but whether they truly have faith we dont always know.
For someone who lives where you live, you sure do seem to pay a lot of attention to the king and president...
 

MaryM

Well-known member
Nov 25, 2022
451
256
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#22
I dont really know the past of everyone in a church congregation, as havent been raised in church long enough to know tho adulterers tend to leave and not stay and ask forgiveness.

Its probably too traumatic for them to stay, even those whove lost children often dont want to go back to their home church even if it had happy memories, at least in the same church with the same people

I live in a big city that has many many churches I thinking it would be different if it was a small town and there was only a couple of churches or even just one.

in OT times the woman was stoned, though its not done anymore, it seems like shunning is done instead. How could she show shes repented anyway? what would she be able to do to show shes remorseful. by stigma you mean like a big scarlet letter A for adultery?

I wonder why men were not stoned for adultery. Just a thought, though I wouldn't want anyone stoned at all - it's barbaric. Congregations of churches should have no business shunning anyone anyway - Jesus said he who is without sin could throw the first stone. Leave judgment to God.

I do believe in the precious gift of bestowing your body, your most intimate physical self, on only your one chosen true love. If married, then only your spouse should be allowed that close, if you value yourself. Old fashioned yes, but that is the principle I hold to.
 

PennEd

Senior Member
Apr 22, 2013
12,985
8,691
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#23
I wonder why men were not stoned for adultery. Just a thought, though I wouldn't want anyone stoned at all - it's barbaric. Congregations of churches should have no business shunning anyone anyway - Jesus said he who is without sin could throw the first stone. Leave judgment to God.

I do believe in the precious gift of bestowing your body, your most intimate physical self, on only your one chosen true love. If married, then only your spouse should be allowed that close, if you value yourself. Old fashioned yes, but that is the principle I hold to.
I believe it has to do with the lineage and bloodlines of the father.

A man can’t get pregnant from a woman.

With no paternity tests available, a woman could claim it was her husband that got her pregnant, and not some elicit partner she had sec with.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,178
113
#24
Men WERE stoned I think its just in the Bible at the time of the new Testament people blamed the woman, maybe because the man was in a higher up position.

Some men just cant do that and want to bed every women they see, like its some kind of conquest thing. If they sire a lot of illegitmitate children they dont care, not being married they can just say. to them its her problem. And maybe pay her off.

Nowadays of someone does that the only recourse may be to get govt help. The parents of the adulterer often arent around to admonish them not that they will listen anyway as its probably a generational thing. Children learn not to question their parents when they have girlfriends and boyfriends, though some are brazenly open about it.

David wanted to make out like Uriah may have fathered the child he had with Bathsheba. Bathsheba wasnt prepared to lie about that. David had other children with his other wives didnt he?

does lineage and bloodlines even matter for the father? If you adopting a child the only thing you would care about is that child is ALIVE and breathing. Of Jacobs 12 sons, they were all from four different mothers!
God didnt think the child Abraham had with Hagar was the one he promised though I think its more a matter of TIMING than anything to do with lineage or blood.

God counts children He raises up rather than the whole lay with a woman and then just abandon them (even if pregnant) thing a lot of men do.
 

Susanna

Well-known member
Apr 14, 2023
759
255
63
47
Galveston and Houston
#26
I wonder why men were not stoned for adultery. Just a thought, though I wouldn't want anyone stoned at all - it's barbaric. Congregations of churches should have no business shunning anyone anyway - Jesus said he who is without sin could throw the first stone. Leave judgment to God.

I do believe in the precious gift of bestowing your body, your most intimate physical self, on only your one chosen true love. If married, then only your spouse should be allowed that close, if you value yourself. Old fashioned yes, but that is the principle I hold to.
Everybody must get stoned

-Bob Dylan
 

Karlon

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2023
1,949
816
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#27
Something that's always bothered me.....

I've been in a Christian world my entire life. Grew up in church. Have a Christian family, they have Christian friends, extended family, etc, etc. Well acquainted with other church congregations. My entire life is centered around Christian people. But something I've noticed time and time again is the stigma placed on women who are caught in the act of sexual sin. Not so much the men, it's the women. Yes, it's a sin. But so is gossip, and murder. Yet the sexual sins (especially for women) are so often viewed, or at least seemingly viewed, as the worst thing a person can do. You would think so from the reaction of people anyway.

Are those women ever truly forgiven by the people? Her past will be mentioned at one time or another; gossiped about. She is never truly accepted with open arms into the congregation. It may appear she has been, but I'd be surprised if she's invited to a Christmas party!

Why are we like that? Is it insecurities from the women in the church? Does this "sinful" woman have a lower character than other sinners? Because I'm certain I would be forgiven by the community sooner if I actually murdered my husband than if I committed adultery. As Christians, we are called to love all people. And all people have sinned. God doesn't specify loving some sinners over others.

I'm referring to those confessing, remorseful women that have asked forgiveness.

Has anyone else witnessed this bias? Am I way off base here? Looking for your opinions.

*Please note: I've read back over this and it seems I've included everyone. That wasn't my intention. My intent is merely to find out why SOME people hate this sin so much more than others. Also, to bring it to their attention. They may not even realize it.
don't forget the "she did it once, she can do it again" thought that may forever be in someone's brain. too, since we know God said adultery is a reason to move on, that envelops great comfort & confidence to move on & it's an easy quick decisions to make.