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M
One fellow explained to me that people just feel uncomfortable around me because they're on a different wavelength to me (their middle class humour and conversation is evidently incompatible with someone who's come from down t'pit). He told me that I had a duty to conform.
I think he got it back to front.
I think he got it back to front.
M
As far as I'm concerned as soon as one person puts sole responsibility on the other things have reached an end, at least until that person has grown a little more, in terms of forging relationships/friendships no-one has to conform, and when that does occur things are never healthy because there is no balance and one person is unavoidably dimished.
It's easy to say one person should make more effort to bridge the gap when you are each from a different walk of life, but there is no reason one person should do all the reaching, you know I'll always reach out and offer my hand, but I won't make the effort to force it.
It never ceases to surprise me how many people have the view that if you want to be a part of something you have to make a huge effort to prove yourself and justify them spending the time on you, that kind of attitude is common and it's poisin to society.
It's easy to say one person should make more effort to bridge the gap when you are each from a different walk of life, but there is no reason one person should do all the reaching, you know I'll always reach out and offer my hand, but I won't make the effort to force it.
It never ceases to surprise me how many people have the view that if you want to be a part of something you have to make a huge effort to prove yourself and justify them spending the time on you, that kind of attitude is common and it's poisin to society.
T
I met alot of people in my youth group, maybe because it was all over the united states and our youth director was amazing...most of my gfs have been random, situations i wouldnt think to meet them in. Its surprising how new opportunities can be in finding not just a girlfriend but a friend. Those to me are the worthwhile dates, because honestly picking up girls or boys at the bar isnt the best choice lol gotta go to a neutral place, study group or something where its not one of the main ideas in the air so to speak.
C
I don't know that Jordan9 won't still have a lot of the same problem he goes for the pool of girls at church. Not to be contentious, but I think women are more inclined than men to attend church for other reasons than to be with God. Be it the social aspect, or to be percieved as good, or because they're families went when they were kids, whatever. I'm not saying guys are all angels in the service either, just that it seems that you hit upon a lot more duds that are girls in a church than a girl would find dud guys. Perhaps I'm only seeing it from one persective. I just know that when I look for nice, godly girls at a church, I've got to dodge a lot of flak and put up with a lot of posers usually before I get to a women of God.
Jordan9, have you tried going to a home-church or a small group bible study? If you find a co-ed one that the Spirit is moving and working in, you might have some good luck there. The key is to make sure the Spirit's moving in it, and that that it's alive and vibrant in the Christ sense. That's where I've met the most awesome Christian girls I know. It's not a guaranteed source by any means or anything, but the odds are a lot better.
God bless you man and help you in your search,
- Topher
Jordan9, have you tried going to a home-church or a small group bible study? If you find a co-ed one that the Spirit is moving and working in, you might have some good luck there. The key is to make sure the Spirit's moving in it, and that that it's alive and vibrant in the Christ sense. That's where I've met the most awesome Christian girls I know. It's not a guaranteed source by any means or anything, but the odds are a lot better.
God bless you man and help you in your search,
- Topher
The church I go to is full of married couples, I have tried going to the bible study for young people, I don't know their deal, whenever I try to go they are nowhere to be found. Also, I think women might get alot more attention in places outside the church as opposed to inside is because alot of guys outside the church don't care about the girl they are flirting with, who they are, but being lead by a different spirit that is not so picky.
F
I think this is a good question because while, as Christians, you should know God has a plan for you and sometimes that takes time, it also doesn't mean that God expects you to sit alone for years, tapping your feet, just waiting for Him to put that person right in front of you, we have to make some steps also. It's very hard to find good people to date where I am also...but sometimes you never know when you are going to have to run to the store for milk, rent a movie, get a tire fixed, etc. and you happen to run into someone God put in your path, when you least except it. So, when that happens, don't ignore it...it could very well be exactly what God put in your path.