Have You Ever Traded One Vice (Bad Habit) For Another? One Thing, One Thing, Leads to Another... (for those who remember the song!)

[seoulsearch]

Hey Everyone,

I have often said that sugar is the bane of my existence. I grew up with a health-conscious mother who limited our intake as best she could, but seeing as I think I was born with a full set of sweet teeth (not just a mere sweet tooth,) once I got out on my own and could buy my own groceries, it's been a struggle.

My latest downfalls are usually a handful of chocolate chips (which can easily turn into half a bag in one sitting,) and fig newton cookies (I could easily clear out a full sleeve or more in a day if I don't watch it.) Right now I don't let myself buy any other sweets. The reason I choose chocolate chips is because I try to eat them one at a time, in an effort to slow down and control my consumption. The fig newtons are to try to calm my cravings for cookies and cakes with frosting. I've tried substituting fruit but that has its pitfalls as well -- at one point, I was literally eating a couple of bananas and 6 oranges in a day.

One way I try to slow myself down is to not allow myself to have something sweet until later in the day (though sometimes this doesn't help, as it can be too easy to "overcompensate.") However, the past few days, I'd been doing pretty well. I even astonished myself by getting through almost a full day without reaching for anything sweet (but admittedly conked out before I got the finish line.)

But when I tried to review why I'd come so close to "success" -- I realize it was because I'd been eating tater tots instead. Growing up, we hardly ever had fried foods and while I love some fried things, I don't crave them as much and can go without them for a long time. Unfortunately, I passed some place last week that smelled so delectable with fried fast food goodness, I came home and found myself eating tater tots the next 3 days. (This is also why I don't put much effort into cooking or baking -- if I did, I'd be making rich foods all the time and would be a goner.)

To my dismay, I found that I wasn't making any progress at all. I had simply exchanged one vice -- sugar -- for another -- fried food. ARGH!!

I've read that this kind of thing happens a lot with smokers -- they might eating mints or candy instead of smoking, and the next thing you know, they've gained 20 pounds.

Has something like this ever happened to you or others you know?

* Have you ever tried so hard to cut down or quit on something, only to replace it with something else that was just as bad, annoying, or worse? Other examples might include video games, alcohol, sugary drinks, biting your nails, sleeping too little or too much, etc.

* Did you then find yourself having to quit both the habit you started out with AND the habit you tried to replace it with?

* If you DID find an acceptable substitute, what worked for you?

* What advice would you give to anyone trying to cut down or replace one undesirable habit for another?

I'm guessing this actually happens to people quite often, so I'd be very interested in hearing about what others have found that works -- or doesn't.

 

[Tall_Timbers]

I don't think I've developed too many bad habits over the course of my life. There was a period when my breakfast consisted of numerous handfuls of starbursts and a pound of Strawberry Yoplait yogurt. I'm sure all that yogurt wasn't good for me . When Yoplait first starting appearing on store shelves, it came in one pound containers and those containers cost 50 cents each. The strawberry Yoplait had nice sweet strawberries inside, several of them in each container. It was a great product. Along with that I'd eat lots and lots of starbursts which I'd get for about a dollar for a one pound bag. Before I left for work I'd put 2 or 3 more handfuls of starbursts in my pocket. I did this every morning for quite a long time. Not sure when I changed my breakfast practices.

That's about the only bad habit I can think of at the moment that I had. If I do want to stop something/change something I need to go all in 100%. Several years ago, I decided I'd eliminate all sweets from my diet and try to avoid any product that contained high fructose corn syrup. I'd hoped to lower my A1C reading just a bit. Interestingly, I became aware of the reality that people are always offering me sweets, and I'd have to say no thank you. Some people didn't like me saying no, so I started saying I could take some of the offered sweet to my wife. I persisted with the no sweets diet for several years, but after seeing no change to my A1C (it actually went up a tenth of a point), I decided I'd return to eating the occasional sweet.

As far as advice... You've got to know what will work for you and then stick with it. For me it would have to be cold turkey. For others you could just cut down on doing something. Know yourself, and lose those bad habits!

 

[Suze]

Hey Everyone,

I have often said that sugar is the bane of my existence. I grew up with a health-conscious mother who limited our intake as best she could, but seeing as I think I was born with a full set of sweet teeth (not just a mere sweet tooth,) once I got out on my own and could buy my own groceries, it's been a struggle.

My latest downfalls are usually a handful of chocolate chips (which can easily turn into half a bag in one sitting,) and fig newton cookies (I could easily clear out a full sleeve or more in a day if I don't watch it.) Right now I don't let myself buy any other sweets. The reason I choose chocolate chips is because I try to eat them one at a time, in an effort to slow down and control my consumption. The fig newtons are to try to calm my cravings for cookies and cakes with frosting. I've tried substituting fruit but that has its pitfalls as well -- at one point, I was literally eating a couple of bananas and 6 oranges in a day.

One way I try to slow myself down is to not allow myself to have something sweet until later in the day (though sometimes this doesn't help, as it can be too easy to "overcompensate.") However, the past few days, I'd been doing pretty well. I even astonished myself by getting through almost a full day without reaching for anything sweet (but admittedly conked out before I got the finish line.)

But when I tried to review why I'd come so close to "success" -- I realize it was because I'd been eating tater tots instead. Growing up, we hardly ever had fried foods and while I love some fried things, I don't crave them as much and can go without them for a long time. Unfortunately, I passed some place last week that smelled so delectable with fried fast food goodness, I came home and found myself eating tater tots the next 3 days. (This is also why I don't put much effort into cooking or baking -- if I did, I'd be making rich foods all the time and would be a goner.)

To my dismay, I found that I wasn't making any progress at all. I had simply exchanged one vice -- sugar -- for another -- fried food. ARGH!!

I've read that this kind of thing happens a lot with smokers -- they might eating mints or candy instead of smoking, and the next thing you know, they've gained 20 pounds.

Has something like this ever happened to you or others you know?

* Have you ever tried so hard to cut down or quit on something, only to replace it with something else that was just as bad, annoying, or worse? Other examples might include video games, alcohol, sugary drinks, biting your nails, sleeping too little or too much, etc.

* Did you then find yourself having to quit both the habit you started out with AND the habit you tried to replace it with?

* If you DID find an acceptable substitute, what worked for you?

* What advice would you give to anyone trying to cut down or replace one undesirable habit for another?

I'm guessing this actually happens to people quite often, so I'd be very interested in hearing about what others have found that works -- or doesn't.

I used to b unable to resist , little bits of silver jewellery , earrings and rings in particular , inexpensive individually but , i used to buy quite a few bits , it started when my favourite aunty who I loved more than I love my mum , was diagnosed with cancer . She died only a few months later but my habit persisted . Eventually I realised I was spending too much money on a luxury when I could c homeless people passing my flat regularly , this made me feel very guilty so , I gave some of the jewellery to charity shops , stopped buying it and started donating a small amount to charity every month .
Just over 3 years ago my step dad became very ill and I started to help to care for him , he died last November . When he first became ill I started collecting old drinking glasses , thankfully I can get them quite cheaply , and in the last couple of months I've noticed I don't seem compelled to hunt for them any more so that's a good sign .
I smoked for 25 years , from when I was 16 until I was 41 . The main reason I gave up was financial . In an effort to kerb the number of smokers , the UK government started to drastically increase the price of cigarettes over 15 years ago . I gave up cold turkey , it was very hard but , all I can say is that God did that for me . He helped me get through every day and I did nothing , He did it all .
I used to always have a small snack before I went to bed , I can't sleep on an empty stomach . I knew it was putting weight on me so , now I have a nice big mug of instant drinking chocolate every night before I go to bed , that does the trick .
When my hubby gave up smoking , which was just before we got together , he lived on Jaffa cakes and Vodka and stayed up for days on end playing a computer game called Warlords 3 😲 . Thankfully he sorted himself out before we got together 😆 .
Don't know what lock down in 2020 was like for u guys but here in the UK it was tough . Prior to it I didn't drink at all but during it I started to drink one bottle of wine a week . This lasted about four years , I've just stopped buying it every week and only buy it if I really want it now .
We all have our little comforts or crutches , I think that's ok as long as we r the masters of them , and not their slaves .

 

[Lynx]

I have decided to quit doing something one time, only to find I had replaced it with something else. On closer examination, because I am always big on understanding why I do something, I discovered I had not addressed the root problem. I had only addressed a symptom, which then manifested in a different symptom instead of just going away.

I cannot remember anybody I know ever changing something in their lives just because it was good for them, or just because somebody told them they should. There always had to be a deeper reason to make them change, something that made them want to change it themselves instead of just doing it because they knew they should. All the alcoholics I know have only changed when they got fundamentally fed up with the life they were living. I never knew a gossip to stop gossiping until the drama came back to bite him hard enough to damage his lifestyle.

But I have known a lot of people who tried to change something just because someone said it was good for them, only to pick up something very similar to take its place.

 

[Suze]

I have decided to quit doing something one time, only to find I had replaced it with something else. On closer examination, because I am always big on understanding why I do something, I discovered I had not addressed the root problem. I had only addressed a symptom, which then manifested in a different symptom instead of just going away.

I cannot remember anybody I know ever changing something in their lives just because it was good for them, or just because somebody told them they should. There always had to be a deeper reason to make them change, something that made them want to change it themselves instead of just doing it because they knew they should. All the alcoholics I know have only changed when they got fundamentally fed up with the life they were living. I never knew a gossip to stop gossiping until the drama came back to bite him hard enough to damage his lifestyle.

But I have known a lot of people who tried to change something just because someone said it was good for them, only to pick up something very similar to take its place.

It does seem as if all the really nice things r bad for us 🥴 I've noticed how many nice but bad things begin with the letter c : crisps , chocolate , cake , cheese , chips , all gorgeous , all bad for us 😕 .

 

[seoulsearch]

It does seem as if all the really nice things r bad for us 🥴 I've noticed how many nice but bad things begin with the letter c : crisps , chocolate , cake , cheese , chips , all gorgeous , all bad for us 😕 .

I hope heaven is a place where, if we do eat, all the naughtiest foods on earth (but also the yummiest) are actually the most nutritious.

 

[seoulsearch]

I used to b unable to resist , little bits of silver jewellery , earrings and rings in particular , inexpensive individually but , i used to buy quite a few bits , it started when my favourite aunty who I loved more than I love my mum , was diagnosed with cancer . She died only a few months later but my habit persisted . Eventually I realised I was spending too much money on a luxury when I could c homeless people passing my flat regularly , this made me feel very guilty so , I gave some of the jewellery to charity shops , stopped buying it and started donating a small amount to charity every month .
Just over 3 years ago my step dad became very ill and I started to help to care for him , he died last November . When he first became ill I started collecting old drinking glasses , thankfully I can get them quite cheaply , and in the last couple of months I've noticed I don't seem compelled to hunt for them any more so that's a good sign .
I smoked for 25 years , from when I was 16 until I was 41 . The main reason I gave up was financial . In an effort to kerb the number of smokers , the UK government started to drastically increase the price of cigarettes over 15 years ago . I gave up cold turkey , it was very hard but , all I can say is that God did that for me . He helped me get through every day and I did nothing , He did it all .
I used to always have a small snack before I went to bed , I can't sleep on an empty stomach . I knew it was putting weight on me so , now I have a nice big mug of instant drinking chocolate every night before I go to bed , that does the trick .
When my hubby gave up smoking , which was just before we got together , he lived on Jaffa cakes and Vodka and stayed up for days on end playing a computer game called Warlords 3 😲 . Thankfully he sorted himself out before we got together 😆 .
Don't know what lock down in 2020 was like for u guys but here in the UK it was tough . Prior to it I didn't drink at all but during it I started to drink one bottle of wine a week . This lasted about four years , I've just stopped buying it every week and only buy it if I really want it now .
We all have our little comforts or crutches , I think that's ok as long as we r the masters of them , and not their slaves .

I loved this post!

It sounds like you should win an award for mastering Behavior Modification, @Suze!

Quitting the things you have is no small feat.

I also love the way you've demonstrated how our little comforts, or ways of coping, that seem very small at first, can easily get out of control if we aren't diligent.

Thank you for reminding us that self-control is a very important, but often forgotten, fruit of the Spirit. 🙏

 

[seoulsearch]

I don't think I've developed too many bad habits over the course of my life. There was a period when my breakfast consisted of numerous handfuls of starbursts and a pound of Strawberry Yoplait yogurt. I'm sure all that yogurt wasn't good for me . When Yoplait first starting appearing on store shelves, it came in one pound containers and those containers cost 50 cents each. The strawberry Yoplait had nice sweet strawberries inside, several of them in each container. It was a great product. Along with that I'd eat lots and lots of starbursts which I'd get for about a dollar for a one pound bag. Before I left for work I'd put 2 or 3 more handfuls of starbursts in my pocket. I did this every morning for quite a long time. Not sure when I changed my breakfast practices.

That's about the only bad habit I can think of at the moment that I had. If I do want to stop something/change something I need to go all in 100%. Several years ago, I decided I'd eliminate all sweets from my diet and try to avoid any product that contained high fructose corn syrup. I'd hoped to lower my A1C reading just a bit. Interestingly, I became aware of the reality that people are always offering me sweets, and I'd have to say no thank you. Some people didn't like me saying no, so I started saying I could take some of the offered sweet to my wife. I persisted with the no sweets diet for several years, but after seeing no change to my A1C (it actually went up a tenth of a point), I decided I'd return to eating the occasional sweet.

As far as advice... You've got to know what will work for you and then stick with it. For me it would have to be cold turkey. For others you could just cut down on doing something. Know yourself, and lose those bad habits!

Ooohhh, this would be just my luck too, that I'd finally quit sugar -- only to find that my numbers went up instead of down.

I'm glad you've struck a balance that is working for you!

 

[seoulsearch]

I have decided to quit doing something one time, only to find I had replaced it with something else. On closer examination, because I am always big on understanding why I do something, I discovered I had not addressed the root problem. I had only addressed a symptom, which then manifested in a different symptom instead of just going away.

I cannot remember anybody I know ever changing something in their lives just because it was good for them, or just because somebody told them they should. There always had to be a deeper reason to make them change, something that made them want to change it themselves instead of just doing it because they knew they should. All the alcoholics I know have only changed when they got fundamentally fed up with the life they were living. I never knew a gossip to stop gossiping until the drama came back to bite him hard enough to damage his lifestyle.

But I have known a lot of people who tried to change something just because someone said it was good for them, only to pick up something very similar to take its place.

This seems to be a core tenant in psychology -- if the root problem isn't taken care of, one coping mechanism will just be replaced with another.

I'm highly emotional and often eat as a reactionary measure. I'm trying to practice working out my emotions in other ways (right now, mostly through reading.) It doesn't quite quell the feelings in the same way, but I'm working on it.

Thanks very much for sharing this!

 

[Suze]

This seems to be a core tenant in psychology -- if the root problem isn't taken care of, one coping mechanism will just be replaced with another.

I'm highly emotional and often eat as a reactionary measure. I'm trying to practice working out my emotions in other ways (right now, mostly through reading.) It doesn't quite quell the feelings in the same way, but I'm working on it.

Thanks very much for sharing this!

A good book can b a great distraction 👍 .

 

[Mem]

I grew up with a health-conscious mother who limited our intake as best she could,

On closer examination, because I am always big on understanding why I do something, I discovered I had not addressed the root problem. I had only addressed a symptom, which then manifested in a different symptom instead of just going away.

This seems to be a core tenant in psychology -- if the root problem isn't taken care of, one coping mechanism will just be replaced with another.

I suspect that all of disfunction can be tethered to a need for love and acceptance, or rather the anxiety for the perception of a lack for it. I mean, for all that we try to do in making sure to meet that need, is there anyone that doesn't fall short of successfully accomplishing a completely whole, unfractured, love? For example, I've heard the theory that smoking mimics a substitute of the need for a kiss. And if so, then it's no wonder that a company like Hershey's has made a fortune of dollops of chocolate wrapped in shiny foil.

 

[Lynx]

I suspect that all of disfunction can be tethered to a need for love and acceptance, or rather the anxiety for the perception of a lack for it. I mean, for all that we try to do in making sure to meet that need, is there anyone that doesn't fall short of successfully accomplishing a completely whole, unfractured, love? For example, I've heard the theory that smoking mimics a substitute of the need for a kiss. And if so, then it's no wonder that a company like Hershey's has made a fortune of dollops of chocolate wrapped in shiny foil.

Uh... Nope. Mine was video games, and mostly to fill time. And when I put them down, i picked up something equally useless.

I didn't actually solve the problem until I stopped looking for ways to waste time and started looking for useful things to do with my time. That was when life stopped being tedious and started being exciting.

 

[Mem]

Uh... Nope. Mine was video games, and mostly to fill time. And when I put them down, i picked up something equally useless.

I didn't actually solve the problem until I stopped looking for ways to waste time and started looking for useful things to do with my time. That was when life stopped being tedious and started being exciting.

Video games came up in my mind as a questionable example of the theory but I'm not ready to dismiss it entirely. I understand a good son honors his mother and his father but, would a commandment be necessary if it came so 'naturally'? Anyway, I couldn't think of how a video game might mimic a kiss, but it does seem to simulate a sort of umbilical cord.

 

[seoulsearch]

I suspect that all of disfunction can be tethered to a need for love and acceptance, or rather the anxiety for the perception of a lack for it. I mean, for all that we try to do in making sure to meet that need, is there anyone that doesn't fall short of successfully accomplishing a completely whole, unfractured, love? For example, I've heard the theory that smoking mimics a substitute of the need for a kiss. And if so, then it's no wonder that a company like Hershey's has made a fortune of dollops of chocolate wrapped in shiny foil.

Video games came up in my mind as a questionable example of the theory but I'm not ready to dismiss it entirely. I understand a good son honors his mother and his father but, would a commandment be necessary if it came so 'naturally'? Anyway, I couldn't think of how a video game might mimic a kiss, but it does seem to simulate a sort of umbilical cord.

Fascinating thought about video games being a parallel to an umbilical cord...

From the gaming channels I've listened to, there have been discussions about games being very cathartic because men often feel defeated, directionless, or not very significant in everyday life.

Maybe they have a boss that constantly yells at them, a feeling of lack of purpose, and their own households seem to ignore them.

But the gaming world provides a constant and ready alternative source of reinforcement -- objectives and "purpose", defeating big bosses, "accomplishing" tasks and "planning out strategies" that lead to victory, being a hero and getting the girl -- all things men are designed to want.

And if they can't or don't want to achieve this in real life, I can see how gaming makes a quick, artificial, and very addictive substitute, especially when mixed with... adult situations.

 

[Lynx]

Fascinating thought about video games being a parallel to an umbilical cord...

From the gaming channels I've listened to, there have been discussions about games being very cathartic because men often feel defeated, directionless, or not very significant in everyday life.

Maybe they have a boss that constantly yells at them, a feeling of lack of purpose, and their own households seem to ignore them.

But the gaming world provides a constant and ready alternative source of reinforcement -- objectives and "purpose", defeating big bosses, "accomplishing" tasks and "planning out strategies" that lead to victory, being a hero and getting the girl -- all things men are designed to want.

And if they can't or don't want to achieve this in real life, I can see how gaming makes a quick, artificial, and very addictive substitute, especially when mixed with... adult situations.

There certainly are a lot of video games that pander to fulfilling a sense of achievement. There is a lot of pride in gamer communities on the whole.

I'm not so sure about the umbilical thing though. Most game controllers are wireless these days.

 

[seoulsearch]

There certainly are a lot of video games that pander to fulfilling a sense of achievement. There is a lot of pride in gamer communities on the whole.

I'm not so sure about the umbilical thing though. Most game controllers are wireless these days.

I'm not even a gamer, and even I have to stand in awe of how effective, albeit, frightening, gamification can be.

Robinhood, the investment brokerage, got in trouble for gamifying their app too much -- handing out digital stars and graphics when people made trades, etc., just like in a video game -- but it was also enticing people to make more trades, and therefore take bigger risks with their money.

I have a walking app on my phone and sometimes the only reason I go walking is to get the confetti and/or earn a higher level on the app.

I tried installing a new walking app last year on my phone, but went back to this one because it has a lot more categories for you to be able to earn "rewards" -- even though they mean nothing.

 

[JohnDB]

Actually Jesus discussed this very thing....

It was not one of those "Awwww, I love you" type messages either...

(Not advocating in favor of having or sustaining a vice)

But....
Essentially what He said was that many people pick up the vice/sin of Self-Righteousness, unforgiveness, and Comdemmation of others to replace the vice/sin that they successfully overcame. And that is the WORST SIN other than unbelief. (Which is the deadly sin)


The name "Israel" in Hebrew means literally "struggles with God" meaning that at the same time we struggle with sin.

We are human. We will NOT ever win our battles with sin. (Which is why we are desperate for a Savior)
But it's the struggling that matters. Our honest efforts to win these battles that matter...not the victory over them and definitely the person for whom we pick up the struggle for...that matters too.


Because....if I've heard it once I've heard it a thousand times. Theres no one who treats tobacco smokers half as bad as a former smoker.
indeed....they are brutal. Especially if they still smoke a cigarette or cigar occasionally.
Just my two cents.

 

[Subhumanoidal]

Video games came up in my mind as a questionable example of the theory but I'm not ready to dismiss it entirely. I understand a good son honors his mother and his father but, would a commandment be necessary if it came so 'naturally'? Anyway, I couldn't think of how a video game might mimic a kiss, but it does seem to simulate a sort of umbilical cord.

I don't consider myself a gamer, but I do have a few games I enjoy playing.
I see no connection between playing video games and kissing.
Nor do I understand the umbilical cord idea.

Firstly, let's take a look at the average gamer. They tend to often fall into two categories, scrawny or overweight.
Popular categories for games often include playing a strong character, typically starting out as a bit of a weakling, but as you play and grow you become stronger. Lots of fighting, be it with guns or swords or magic.
So it's easy to see how people that may feel unable to be able to do things in real life, that may make them feel less masculine, can be accomplished through these kinds of games.
I know for myself that element has always been apart of my time playing games. And even moreso now, being disabled.
Sometimes I'll even think about that while playing, since I mostly play action/fighting games.

The game Skyrim is a perfect example of this. You start out as a prisoner on a cart with other prisoners on your way to be beheaded. But throughout you take down countless bad guys, grow stronger, get better armor and weapons.
You can help end a Civil War through several attacks and one grand battle. You fight dragons all sorts of things.
By the end you're pretty much the savior.
So I'd say, at least with some games, it's more about living vicariously through the game to make you feel bettter about your own inadequacies.

Other games allow a person to show off their intellect.
At the end of the day nearly all games present an requirement to overcome challenges through one means or another.

This makes much more sense to me than kisses or umbilical cords.

 

[Mem]

But the gaming world provides a constant and ready alternative source of reinforcement -- objectives and "purpose", defeating big bosses, "accomplishing" tasks and "planning out strategies" that lead to victory, being a hero and getting the girl -- all things men are designed to want.

There certainly are a lot of video games that pander to fulfilling a sense of achievement. There is a lot of pride in gamer communities on the whole.

This makes much more sense to me than kisses or umbilical cords.

The rabbi I used to frequently tune in to, with interest for his philosophical insights, offered basically the same outlooks about smoking and gaming. He said, he would pose the question to parents of school aged children, "would you rather that your child cheat on an exam or smoke?" He argued that smoking was better because the other was a moral failure and he touted the benefits of gaming, although I don't recall what they are but that's probably because I'm also not that big of big gamer.

 

[Lynx]

Skyrim... Ugh.

Skyrim had so many things wrong with it. The 2 mile wide, one centimeter deep plot line was just the tip of the iceberg.

The first time I fought a dragon it was thrilling. I was dodging fireballs and slinging arrows, just barely hanging on. By the 14th dragon, it was kind of boring.

If you are fighting a dragon and it is boring, something is very, very wrong.