I have so many things I have done in my life wrong. My marriage is wrong. I struggle to read the Bible and it feels to be a chore sometimes. I have been promiscuous, made money in horrible ways, and done drugs. Stolen and lied. But I have been baptized. And I want God to touch me the way he touches others. I want it so bad I cry for it. I do not want to put too much on here about what I have done. But I feel God is trying to pull me to him. Lately things have gotten bad for me. Ever since I started this site. I think Satan knows he is losing. But I know I still need help. God has done things so great in my life and I have met awesome people. But it is me. For some reason I can not connect fully and I do not know why. If anyone has anything to say to help, I would love to hear it. I want to help others so much. But I know I am still not there.