Brother,
My heart is right there with you man. I don't know exactly what's going on in your life, but one thing I do know...God is faithful. Let that thought invade your life, even in the broken parts, the parts that feel so deeply rooted inside you that no light could ever reach there. But let me also tell you this...God is light, and in Him there is no darkness. His light, His mercy and grace...His comfort and shleter....they can reach even there....even there man....and that to me is most amazing. Beyond the place I can reach...and I've tried...down where I just can't seem to get my hands to relieve the pain inside....His love can. And, I'm very sorry that I have to say this, but it is most absolutely true...He very often has us walk with Him...not over or under or around the pain...but through it. And He is faithful, He will keep His promise...and will not forsake you. It will feel like it....trust me...but we don't walk by feeling....we walk by faith...and when the darkness closes in, and our enemy surrounds us...His Name is our strong tower.
Get yourself on your face and cry to Him...He knows...He understands....and He alone saves once, to kill off our old man and pay the price through His death, but in His resurrection, we have new life and the promise that He is faithful.
God's rich favor and blessing on you brother. Keep seeking Him. Stay the course...run the race, even if running means dragging your body with an elbow right now....keep running. And don't forget, we are better together...the body of Christ, His church is here to bear your burden as well. Sometimes we need God with skin on....other people...
Blessings man.