Homosexual Brother In Law

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T

tstumf

Guest
Well I’m going to put it this way. She observes it verbally but when the rubber meets the road and the situations get real and it gets put into practice she resists and does her own thing as in this particular instance. she actually will go and try to Intentionally be more assertive and overpower me verbally while using guilt and over the top emotional responses that don’t seem to fit the discussion to try to make me back down from my position during conflict or general disagreement. Like I was saying if she isn’t being confronted by me and I go passive things are great! But as soon as I start leading biblically and it challenges something in her man it gets rough conversationally and becomes impossible to navigate and find resolve.
 

GardenofWeeden

Well-known member
Jul 27, 2018
411
367
63
The Garden of Weeden
The unequal yoked thing has me spinning my wheels though. I wish I could name this as that simple but I’m not sure it is. Can you really call it an unequal yoke in Gods eyes if she professes to be Christian but yet still refuses to accept headship? (Her mother has a big problem with the headship stuff as well and is quite vocal about her disagreement with those scriptures that show men as head.) We’re married 8 years. She votes conservative, Talks conservative. She only goes along with my lead only as long as it’s agreeable to her and doesn’t inconvenience her. As soon as it’s not agreeable though she does as she wants. I don’t know what to make of it. Probably stuff that needs hammered out in marriage counseling. Who knows what that’s going to surface. I’m just taking it a day at a time these days just doing the best I know how through prayer and Gods leading. Beyond that I don’t know where to take this problem. Most men I approach on this situation really don’t have too much to offer that hasn’t already been discussed here. I’m just calling in prayer for unity in my marriage at this point.
I don't necessarily believe you're unequally yoked or that this is a "liberal/conservative" thing *insert eyeroll here*. For some reason your wife doesn't trust you to lead her. Whether that is because of her mother, her father, or because of something else in her/your past, she isn't sure what's right or wrong when it comes to headship, and like everyone else on Earth she is doing what she thinks is best. I don't know what the answer is, as that is up to God to reveal, so in the meantime, just love her as she is, and pray for her, while letting Christ work on her heart.
 
T

tstumf

Guest
I don't necessarily believe you're unequally yoked or that this is a "liberal/conservative" thing *insert eyeroll here*. For some reason your wife doesn't trust you to lead her. Whether that is because of her mother, her father, or because of something else in her/your past, she isn't sure what's right or wrong when it comes to headship, and like everyone else on Earth she is doing what she thinks is best. I don't know what the answer is, as that is up to God to reveal, so in the meantime, just love her as she is, and pray for her, while letting Christ work on her heart.
Thankyou. At this point that’s all I’m asking for is just continued prayers for loving patience, revealing of the issue and then healing of said issue whatever it is that is off here in my marriage.
 
Oct 19, 2021
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wgreyhawk.com
throw away the scales of justice... marriage is 100%/100%. Give her the aFFection/aTTention/aPPreciation (FTP) that she needs. Help out as much as you can; spend time with her, etc. Even if she's giving 50 and you're giving 100, just keep going... eventually it should balance out; stick with it.
 
T

tstumf

Guest
throw away the scales of justice... marriage is 100%/100%. Give her the aFFection/aTTention/aPPreciation (FTP) that she needs. Help out as much as you can; spend time with her, etc. Even if she's giving 50 and you're giving 100, just keep going... eventually it should balance out; stick with it.
I wish I could say that’s working I really wish I could . Maybe I haven’t exhausted all options yet and I’ve probably missed the mark a few times, but Man. I’ve done so many of those things to the best of my knowledge for our marriage and I’ve done them to the point of exhaustion many times. I’m not expecting a metal or a trophy for what I’ve done by any means . I’ve put my wife and family in higher priority over the job quite often and my pay check reflects that which I’ve accepted as ok . As soon as I put in the expected required time in on the clock I’m making dust headed back home. I don’t go out to the bar drinking or anything like that. She gets flowers quite routinely Valentine’s Day, Anniversary, birthdays as far back as I can remember. I’ve distanced myself from my family members that she couldn’t get along with unfortunately and that led to its disasters which is a whole story on its own . I spend more time with her than any other man besides during working hours when she’s also actually working. I really literally don’t have any close male friends besides maybe a family we have supper or lunch with every so often. The old friends I did have were abrasive to her and kinda got pushed away. I get an hour with a few older gentlemen on Tuesday nights for bible study at the church we go to routinely on Sunday mornings . The rest of the time is quite literally with her and our son. I clean house quite routinely , laundry, dishes, trash I don’t grumble or complain about doing them (different discussion with its own issues a ways down the chat room list). Again I do it without grumbling or anger to my knowledge . I take my share of time off work when my son is sick to allow her some relief. I try my best to be an agreeable person and we do get some good times and a few laughs in. I read to our son quite routinely at night , had routinely bathed , showered and put him to bed. That’s our life in a nutshell without getting too personal in a public chat room . I don’t know what else I can do physically besides continue being faithfully patient ,praying through this and inviting others such as this chat page and my Tuesday night men’s bible study group to pray for our unity as well.
 
Oct 19, 2021
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wgreyhawk.com
@tstumf That sounds really good; keep moving forward to that Alpha goal I know you have. You can do this. Let's talk about another trap that I fell into. I used to be quick to anger; my wife would say something; I would take offense and defend myself; she'd get angrier; I'd get angrier; eventually, we'd be yelling and saying mean things. Does this sound familiar? As head of the family, I've had to learn to keep my calm and not allow discussions to escalate. Easier said than done; I know. Sometimes, people don't fully express what's making them upset. It might not be you that's upsetting her. Stay calm; comfort; listen; don't try to "fix" it.
 

CS1

Well-known member
May 23, 2012
12,170
4,000
113
Thankyou. I guess what I’m wondering is. Should I view this as in the context of the plank and speck from the sermon on the mount from here on and in doing so leave it alone and focus on my planks and leave my wife’s speck alone and just continue to work around her speck ignoring it and trust God will correct her when he sees fit .Or do I as a husband have an obligation to God as her head to point out this speck to her and how it hurts our marriage and try to seek a solution with her?
remember you are not passing judgment by calling sin, sin as the Word of God does. That is not judgment, that is true and many will say when you tell the truth; " you are judging" or " the bible says do not judge". the only two verses of the Bible they think they know.
That is a mechanism used to try and shut you up. And a lie from the pit of hell. They have been judged already without Christ. You are trying to help them see the need for Jesus. Accepting sin is not required to prove you are loving.
 

Aaron56

Well-known member
Jul 12, 2021
2,404
1,360
113
I wish I could say that’s working I really wish I could . Maybe I haven’t exhausted all options yet and I’ve probably missed the mark a few times, but Man. I’ve done so many of those things to the best of my knowledge for our marriage and I’ve done them to the point of exhaustion many times. I’m not expecting a metal or a trophy for what I’ve done by any means . I’ve put my wife and family in higher priority over the job quite often and my pay check reflects that which I’ve accepted as ok . As soon as I put in the expected required time in on the clock I’m making dust headed back home. I don’t go out to the bar drinking or anything like that. She gets flowers quite routinely Valentine’s Day, Anniversary, birthdays as far back as I can remember. I’ve distanced myself from my family members that she couldn’t get along with unfortunately and that led to its disasters which is a whole story on its own . I spend more time with her than any other man besides during working hours when she’s also actually working. I really literally don’t have any close male friends besides maybe a family we have supper or lunch with every so often. The old friends I did have were abrasive to her and kinda got pushed away. I get an hour with a few older gentlemen on Tuesday nights for bible study at the church we go to routinely on Sunday mornings . The rest of the time is quite literally with her and our son. I clean house quite routinely , laundry, dishes, trash I don’t grumble or complain about doing them (different discussion with its own issues a ways down the chat room list). Again I do it without grumbling or anger to my knowledge . I take my share of time off work when my son is sick to allow her some relief. I try my best to be an agreeable person and we do get some good times and a few laughs in. I read to our son quite routinely at night , had routinely bathed , showered and put him to bed. That’s our life in a nutshell without getting too personal in a public chat room . I don’t know what else I can do physically besides continue being faithfully patient ,praying through this and inviting others such as this chat page and my Tuesday night men’s bible study group to pray for our unity as well.
This issue is not because of your sin or her sin. It is arranged as an opportunity to grow together as one.
 
Dec 29, 2019
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Hello there. I have myself quite a situation. My wife’s brother is a Homosexual and recently got “married” to his partner in California. The ceremony was private due to covid but now that the restrictions are gone they want to have a larger reception in October and want us there. I’m torn on this cause they are nice people but there is something telling me not to go. I have this feeling that I would be engaging in celebration of someone’s sin which I’m very against. It also concerns me about the example I’m setting for my 5 year old boy. He would be watching daddy compromise his beliefs and watching daddy essentially celebrate sin. Am I thinking on this the wrong way as a Christian man, husband and father? If I stand against this lead my family as God intended and refuse to attend it will absolutely make family members very angry and disappointed in me. It’s probably going to add stress to an already weak marriage of mine cause my wife believes she needs to be there for her brother. This isn’t the first issue we have had regarding the Homosexual brother in law. My wife’s family is also pushing us to allow the Homosexual couple to be my sons legal guardian/ godparents if we were to pass on. My wife thinks it’s a great idea but I’m not ok with this because I believe that as a father I have the duty to give my son the best chance at living in a Christian household with a strong masculine husband and wife marriage. I have a brother who is married but my wife doesn’t get along with them. She has a sister with a husband but she has that one out of the question as well. I’m trying to get out ahead of this before it becomes all a big train wreck but I keep stumbling. Please help. How do I lead my family through this mess? If nothing else please pray for us.
Ethics & Morality
Paraphernalia is a disorder manifest in childhood grove, bisexual not attracted not exclusively to one sex, education about Paraphernalia may help
A little history
Paraphilia is the Church, pastors, priests, clergymen, and new age teenagers, turning men into pedophile sexual abuse innocent children in the Vatican, the Catholic system, a case of 216,000 since 1950, and at least 3,677 people were abused, Church concluded by clergy between 1946 to 2021
Pope Benedict XVI resigns and apparently tired of clergy sexual abuse in the Vatican

Galatians 1:8-10 (KJV) But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed.
As we said before, so say I now again, If any man preaches any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be accursed.
For do I now persuade men or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ.

2 Corinthians 11:4 (KJV) For if he that cometh preaches another Jesus, whom we have not preached, or if ye receive another spirit, which ye have not received, or another gospel, which ye have not accepted, ye might well bear with him.

2 Timothy 3:1-5 (NKJV) But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come:
For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!

Ephesians 5:3-16 (NKJV) But fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints; neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks.
For this you know, that no fornicator, unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.
Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.
Therefore do not be partakers with them.
For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light

(for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth), finding out what is acceptable to the Lord.
And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them.
For it is shameful even to speak of those things which are done by them in secret.
But all things that are exposed are made manifest by the light, for whatever makes manifest is light.
Therefore He says: "Awake, you who sleep, Arise from the dead, And Christ will give you light."
See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil.

In Romans 1:24, 26, 28; God gives them up to a Reprobate Mind, And Romans 1:29-31; There are 24 Sins, God speaks about in these verses.

In Romans 1:32; Man knows he deserves to be damned and that he persists in his sins, and that he even enjoys and delights to see others sin against God, because of his depravity.
Romans 6:17; Romans 8:32; Romans 4:26; Mark 9:31; Galatians 2:20; Ephesians 5:2,25; Mark 4:29; Acts 28:16; Matthew 4:12; Timothy 1:20; Matthew 17:22; 26:16James; 6:64 I Corinthians 11:23; Mark 4:29

The Principle of Marriage

We read in Psalms 127:3 Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward.

Lev 18:22 You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. It is an abomination.

1 Corinthians 11:14-15 (NKJV) Does not even nature itself teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a dishonor to him?
But if a woman has long hair, it is a glory to her; for her hair is given to her for a covering.

Lev 18:22 (NLT) “Do not practice homosexuality, having sex with another man as with a woman, It is a detestable sin.

People do not honor their souls
The Child is born in water and blood, and when you separate family Covenant between man and woman, this call shedding the blood of your family also so the results of abortion breaking the covenant with the firstborn of God, and you kill your family heritage! It is a detestable sin.

a little history. in a biblical way
A fetal heartbeat may first be detected by a vaginal ultrasound as early as 5 1/2 to 6 weeks after gestation.
That's when a fetal pole, the first visible sign of a human-soul developing embryo, can sometimes be seen.
But between 6 1/2 to 7 weeks after gestation, a heartbeat can be better assessed.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,081
1,748
113
Well I’m going to put it this way. She observes it verbally but when the rubber meets the road and the situations get real and it gets put into practice she resists and does her own thing as in this particular instance. she actually will go and try to Intentionally be more assertive and overpower me verbally while using guilt and over the top emotional responses that don’t seem to fit the discussion to try to make me back down from my position during conflict or general disagreement. Like I was saying if she isn’t being confronted by me and I go passive things are great! But as soon as I start leading biblically and it challenges something in her man it gets rough conversationally and becomes impossible to navigate and find resolve.
If it is something important stick to your guns. Stay call. Treat her outbursts like those of a child. You are the adult. You are the leader.