I Can Make a Killer Grilled Cheese (the Secret Super Powers of Singles.)

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seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
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#21
JOY--

Your list is WWWAAAYYY more impressive than mine :). I've found though, that a good temporary cure for wanting to be married is to really talk to married people... I've been going to a Bible study (but it's more like a hang-out type situation--very cool, not formal at all) for women in their mid-twenties to... well... my age ;) and when the married ones really tell us about their lives... coming home to an empty house instead of one full of screaming kids and an absentee husband who does nothing to help around the house isn't quite so bad.
 
T

TiredInfantryman

Guest
#22
Being single has taught me its okay to lay around in my sweat pants eating chocolate chip cookie dough Haagen Dazs watching every episode of Friends while crying obsessively to myself
 
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Leilaii425

Guest
#23
Being single has also taught me how to let myself go. I have now been single for several years, and in that time i havent brushed my teeth so ive developed halatosis. I dont shower, and because of that i have horrible b.o.

Its important to find these things out about yourself. For example i now know how many oreos i can shove in my mouth at once before i start gagging.
 
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GEORGIE

Guest
#24
i can feel extemly lonely and think really deep, well idonu if thats actully good althogh i do talk to God very deeply
 
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greatkraw

Guest
#25
ok ummm, my list:
1) I can check the oil and water in my car
2) I can change a tyre
3) I can change the oil and filter in my car - - - hmm, that reminds me, I need to do that....
4) I have 'blocks' in which to drive up on to change the oil too (no trolley though....)
5) I have owned a sports car
6) my Dad is a bit of a 'Mr Fixit' I think I have a lil of that myself...
7) I can pack up and go anywhere, at anytime for any period! (subject to Uni commitments at present tho)
8) Im ok with grocery shopping on my own...(infact, I prefer it!)
9) I have lived in various places around NZ - just up and went....
10) I have lived cross-culturally as a missionary which was a HUGE mission and faith stretching experience! God really did sustain me when I was out there all alone!
11) I have served on short-term mission trips
12) I can live as a skint student and do Uni
13) I have negotiated many an airport, taxi, bus etc on my own
14) I have survived a miltary coup with God's assurance!
15) I have the ability to be there for friends if needed cos of being unattached.
16) I have been free enough to support a friend through family violence/Womans Refuge/ separation and just recently - divorce.
17) I have the ability to say - ok God, wherever you want me I CAN go...nothing holding me back!
18) I have toured NZ and the South Pacific for a year in a band....something I wouldnt do if I was attached
19) and maybe one of the important points - I spend my own money and dont have to justify it! (not that I have much at the moment anyway!) LOL
20) there is a continual process of refinement....where you are still adjusting to being ok in your own skin and a significant other does NOT define you.

and I think that about completes the list. I wouldnt go to the movies on my own cos I want to share the experience. I still find it hard to go to functions on my own. I struggle with 'couple' meals or just 'couple' environments. Im beginning to accept that all my close friends are breeding at the moment and they are entering a new phase of their life I cant share in.
nice post joy
 
K

kiwi_OT

Guest
#26
This was a hard question for me...
From highschool til a couple of moths ago I was in a long distance relationship, so for me I felt like a single person but I knew I wasnt. And for the majority of that time I very much got used to doing activities and things for myself despite having a boyfriend. One of the best goals I achieved during this was learning how to service my car (oil and tire changing etc).
Another thing I've learnt completely by myself was figuring how how far I could make food last. Living alone and as a very poor student has forced me into figuring this out - but Ive dealt with it happily. Dealing with poverty by myself has been excellent learning for me especially in learning to trust Gods providence. I think if I had a boyfriend helping me out financially - I would not have learnt those lessons.
 
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stlstang

Guest
#27
seoulsearch, this is a greaat topic. If I'm going to be single, which I think I'm a pro at, I should enjoy it. Before reading kiwi's post, I was going to say disposable income, but really being able to blow money is nice to rub in the face of the married people I know asking why I'm single. Also for me, it's makes it easier to serve and help others(Mark 10:43-45).
 
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greatkraw

Guest
#28
I remember working in an office and there were 2 groups.

5pm Friday some went home to their families and the others went out on the town.

I bet each group envied the other.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
14,943
4,584
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#29
seoulsearch, this is a greaat topic. If I'm going to be single, which I think I'm a pro at, I should enjoy it. Before reading kiwi's post, I was going to say disposable income, but really being able to blow money is nice to rub in the face of the married people I know asking why I'm single. Also for me, it's makes it easier to serve and help others(Mark 10:43-45).

Hey, thanks--I think it's interesting that this thread has been resurrected a bit because I posted it quite some time ago.

I find it interesting that I know several people "on the other side" (married and/or with kids) who tell me about all the challenges they face (and sometimes they sound utterly miserable), then they tell me I need to get married and/or have kids. It makes me think, "Um, I'm assuming you're telling me this... so I can be as 'happy' as you are, apparently?"

But hey, we all know life on either side is no picnic.

The grass may look greener from a distance... but no matter what side you live on, it still needs to be watered, fertilized, weeded, and cut!
 
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thefightinglamb

Guest
#30
I am a little crazy in certain ways, and there is no one to annoy with all my pitfalls--because I am sure if someone were close enough to me I would possibly bug them to death. :) Just me and God...

Which reminds me...when I have money, I like doing things with Jesus which might sound a bit crazy but true. I have gone to restaurants on a basis that I did not want to go with anyone but me and Jesus...I did not talk out loud or anything like that...but I remember once I went to Outback Steakhouse with my Bible, and I am not sure I actually read the Bibld, but I prayed and spiritually 'waited, watched, and listened' to what God was tryong to say me about where I was at, what he wanted me to do, and so much more.

See, when you around people the 'noise' of the interaction often distorts or diverts, if you are not careful, you from following whatever God would have you do, no matter how crazy it is (I KNOW God thinks everything we do that is not following or listening to him is 1000x more crazy that the wonders He wants us to follow him to do, anyway)...but when you are by yourself, you learn to understand and elaborate yourself with God, instead of always having to interprit yourself so that someone else can understand you.

For me, it also means I am free to fall in love with EVERY girl...so beware...lol...I have often fallen in love with elderly ladies in any of the many churches I pop into sporadically from time to time...

And oh yeah, I do not have to worry about embarassing or 'appealing to what someone else thinkgs is cool or awesome or whatever' but I can be me--the audacious traveler; not wanting anything or anyone without GOD, and learning to truly love them as God would have me to--even as Christ loves them. :)

This is why I think its great to be single.

I actually take precautions to try and prevent anyone from dating me...as I think dating and stuff only happens beautifully when it happens not as the goal or intention but as the byproduct of seeking God through the path He would have you follow.

I love being SINGLE. :)---some married people can be cool too...

God bless
tony
 
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kiwi_OT

Guest
#31
[Its important to find these things out about yourself. For example i now know how many oreos i can shove in my mouth at once before i start gagging.[/quote]

Lol!! I did this in my first year of college and found out I can fit six in my mouth! lol
 
Oct 7, 2009
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#32
I've never been in a relationship that wasn't of some distance, so I've always been "single" in living style, and growing up I never really had a choice but to learn a lot of life skills living in a family. I did all my family's laundry, and I ended up teaching guys and girls how to do such at the laundromat in the dorm in college. I also did lots of chores around the house, cooking, baking, cleaning, yardwork, etc. I really have just been learning more cooking in my single life. I've created some great recipes for quick meals that taste great.

All in all, though, I've spent time one on one with my Father, learning and questioning and growing with Him in ways that I couldn't have in a relationship. I know that God is preparing my heart for the woman He has planned for me, and though I may be impatient at times, I know there is beauty to His schedule.