I need advice I'm trying to stay strong but this is killing me!

[Kw]

I've always been a strong Christian but after my husband and I were going through a divorce I gave up on what I believed in. I didn't care anymore about anything and I commited adultery. My husband and I were not together but I was still married. Afterward I didn't know what to do, I felt like I killed someone , I commited the sin I told myself I would never do. But the worst part I found out I was pregnant and I came clean to my husband and I've never felt pain like when u hurt the one you love. I'm currently 16 weeks pregnant and the father could be either my husband or the other man. I confessed and asked GOd to forgive me and I repented like never before. I'm glad to say God is fully in my life again . My husband told me he would stay with me and our marriage is better than ever ! I never thought we would be so happy. It's like God knew my marriage was failing but he put it back together for me. I'm scared my husband will run after I have the baby and it's not his I pray God erases the doubts from both of our minds . People tell me God don't work this way but I feel like I got pregnant to save my marriage as stupid as it may sound to some. I cry myself to sleep sometimes , I remember trying to Conceive with my husband and praying to God that he'll allow me to when the time is right and I go and get pregnant when I cheat . I want to understand God more and his plan for me . Im not a bad person, I made a mistake and I just need Someone to talk to. I can't talk to my preacher because he's my father in law and I'm ashamed . Thank you for your help and God bless

 

[Cabbage]

You can always talk to me. Just believe in God. Keep Him close to your heart. I know that God fogave you, but make sure you forgive yourself. Charles Stanley has a book out called the Gift of Forgiveness. It is really great. Talk to your husband abut your concerns of him leaving the baby. Iam sure he will be somewhat open, realizing that this is a true fear.

 

[Brandon777]

I went to Bible college for psychology and counseling, and I understand that God forgives everyone who comes to Him. I wish you grace in abundance. I pray you feel God's limitless grace for you. We are all wretched sinners and we all need grace in abundance; just get a taste of Romans chapter 3 to understand that. Also know that the Bible says that every child is a blessing from the most High (Psalm 127:3-5, Psalm 137: 13-16, James 1:17, John 16:21). God is Love and Love knows forgiveness very well (1 John 4:8, Matthew 18:22). Humble yourself before the Lord and he will pick you up (James 4:10). I pray your husband forgives you and learns to love you and your child with the rare, and priceless type of love that God is-- unconditional love. I pray for the health and wellbeing of the precious gift God has bless you two with. As far as advice for you, I suggest being a sober woman for God and His precious lovable heart--be the woman you were meant to be from when you blessed your mother and father with how precious you are (1 Peter 5:8).

Also, to avoid a situation like this again, besides being repentant to God, understand that there's a lot more to cheating than the physical act. There are emotional ties that are developed over time. It never "comes out of nowhere". Be observant to keep certain private information between you and your husband. You remember being a little girl loving to keep secrets, whispering next to your friends ear. Well you still have that inside you. KEEP SECRETS with your husband and your intimacy will increase. Make it a daily habit to PRAY with your husband, often times this will mean more to the both of you than having sex.

I pray for you to have joy in this trying time. Look to the Lord for your strength and lean on your husband for spiritual advice; it's what the Bible says (1 Timothy 2:11) and he will like that, believe me.

 

[Cabbage]

Brandon777....did you enjoy going for psychology and counseling?

 

[Brandon777]

Cabbage: Yes, very much.
Kw: During my bike ride back to my house I thought of one more thing to say for you. You say you gave up on God after your divorce. Now you're happy again because you're husband understood and forgave you. If your husband had not accepted you back what would you now think of God? I believe if you look deep enough there's a spot in your spirit where you will find doubt and unrest in God. What's more important than things working out between you, your baby, and your husband is your own closeness with Him who created you (Matthew 10:37). Draw that out and test God to see if He is good (Psalm 34:8) "Taste and see that Yahweh is good." Indeed, our God is a good one. You have to find this out yourself though. Give a lot of effort in searching for God, because that's what He wants us to do.. to see that He really IS good. Remember that Satan, his army, our ancenstors and ourselves are the reason for the suffering and misery we see today, not God. He watches and sees it for a short time for good reason.

 

[Powmom]

Continue to have Faith and Trust our Lord. Do not dwell as your physical health is very important during your pregnancy. The Lord allowed you to have a baby, no matter what the outcome will be, you are being given a gift. I will pray for you....you need to also forgive your self.

 

[Kw]

Brandon 777-

I thought hard about what you said and I do believe that I feel unrest with the Lord . I Love God and I want to learn more and I'm beginning to. I just find myself blaming him sometimes , though I know it's my mistake not his. I feel like I'm being punished for my sins . I pray so much and I still don't feel ease with myself . My husband forgives me and he says he won't leave me no matter what the outcome is and I'm thankful for this. I just don't understand Gods plan for me and my pregnancy . I dont understand why now after all the tines ive prayed to concieve with my husband. I need to forgive myself but im in so much doubt. But thank you for the advice and I will continue to pray for trust in the Lord. I'm glad I have great people to talk to and help me through this

 

[Brandon777]

I'm glad I have great people to talk to and help me through this

No problem, I love to help people with spiritual questions!

I need to forgive myself but im in so much doubt.

A time of doubt is the perfect opportunity to grow in a more genuine affection for our true and faithful friend Jesus.

I feel like I'm being punished for my sins .

Make no doubt here, God does punish those He loves (Hebrews 12:6). He is, after all, our Father (Proverbs 3:12). However, this punishment is not retribution, like how it is with unbelievers, but rather it is chastisement for correction. There is a very large difference there. Psalm 103 especially verse 12 is perfect for you right now, to see how large that difference is. Also, we are taught to be joyful in a time of trial because our character is being shaped to further God's will (James 1 this chapter would be good for you to think on, then ask your husband or me about it). It's all about God, not us. If we can place the focus off us, and see how all this affects God, using empathy (not pity), then we open our view to a world without worry and doubt. Because God has nothing to worry or doubt about, so if we keep thinking like Him... then hey, now we've become godly (like God in mind) and our doubts and worries are gone.

 

[misterc]

There is a lot God does that we don't understand. We don't really have to understand, just trust. Congratulations on the healing in your marriage and the new child. Rejoice! You are being blessed and seem afraid to rejoice in it. Maybe you want to punish yourself. Your husband forgave you. You asked God to forgive you. All that's left is you need to forgive yourself.

 

[dmdave17]

There is a lot God does that we don't understand. We don't really have to understand, just trust. Congratulations on the healing in your marriage and the new child. Rejoice! You are being blessed and seem afraid to rejoice in it. Maybe you want to punish yourself. Your husband forgave you. You asked God to forgive you. All that's left is you need to forgive yourself.

Amen! The only thing I would add is that "God has forgiven you, too".

By the way, I like your avatar. Care to speculate on how many members of this site actually know who he is?

 

[cec4me]

I have a scripture to help. It one of my very favorates. Romands 8:28... And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to his purpose. May God bless You and your Husband.

 

[Ramon]

Brandon 777-

I thought hard about what you said and I do believe that I feel unrest with the Lord . I Love God and I want to learn more and I'm beginning to. I just find myself blaming him sometimes , though I know it's my mistake not his. I feel like I'm being punished for my sins . I pray so much and I still don't feel ease with myself . My husband forgives me and he says he won't leave me no matter what the outcome is and I'm thankful for this. I just don't understand Gods plan for me and my pregnancy . I dont understand why now after all the tines ive prayed to concieve with my husband. I need to forgive myself but im in so much doubt. But thank you for the advice and I will continue to pray for trust in the Lord. I'm glad I have great people to talk to and help me through this

The Lord answers prayers my friend, if we ask in a pure heart. My friend, Sarah didn't understand the promise God made her either. And Mary didn't understand the purpose either. But Mary who was humble was chosen by God himself to have a son who would be the Savior of the world. How do you know? Maybe this child will be anointed to bring many people into the kingdom? No matter how long it may take.

I had been prophesied over a long time ago, but only recently have I realized the Lord working in my life. Maybe there is an enormous blessing coming? My friend, trust the Lord in all you do, and don't look for your own understanding but look to HIS understanding. I can tell you a good way to do this, if you doubt even in the least, then you have not understood his understanding. So consider everything, test all things to see if they be of God. May Jesus bless you.

 

[Broern]

Apostle Paul said, "Forgetting the past and look toward the future. I believe God had forgiven you for the past. I am sure your present life now with your husband will be more fruitful toward the best. Just keep on learning and God will give you wisdom to light up your ways for this renewed relationship. God bless your family.

 

[chatamiga]

It seems that you are not able to shake off the guilt and shame, although you have a repentful, broken heart and contrite spirit. Sometimes, christians open the door to the enemy of our souls through sin. He torments the soul. But, glory to Jesus you can overcome the enemy. There is a spiritual battle going on to keep you down feeling guilty and shameful. Here is how to fight the enemy of your soul. Whenever the enemy reminds you of your past sin, he is lying that you still have sin on your soul. Revelations 12:10, 11 There is no condemnation to those in Christ. Romans 8:1, John 3:17, John 8:3, 7-11, John 12:47 Plead the blood of Jesus over your soul outloud or in a whisper so the enemy can hear you stand on the Word of God trusting in the scriptures and Jesus. Declare in the name of Jesus that you have been cleansed by the blood of the Lamb and forgiven. Boldy,quote scriptures on God's forgiveness and cleansing/purification. Isaiah 43:25, Isaiah 44:22, Psalms 103:3,10-12, 1 John 1:7,9, Request that the Lord Christ give you a Spirit of Liberty Isaiah 61:1-3, 2 Corinth 3:14-17 and Anointing Isaiah 10:27 to deliver you from the enemy. Say, "in the name of Jesus, I break this bondage of condemnation, accusation, guilt, shame, and unbelief and loose the stronghold off my life. In Jesus name, I cast out or away the spirits of torment of condemnation, accusations, guilt, shame, and doubts/unbelief" You have authoirty and rights as a daughter of God to put to flight the enemy in the name of Jesus. Do not fear. There are many angels of God at your side waiting for you to use the name of Jesus. They and the Lord will fight the enemy with you. Don't say to the Lord , "Lord you do it." The Lord will respond, " I gave you authority to cast out/away devils with my name, You do it." Mark 16:17, Luke 9:1, Luke 10:17-20 The more hours you read the Word of God being filled with the Word of God, you will have more courage and faith to do this for your soul. You and the brethren will interceed for you. The truth shall set you free. John 8:32, 36

 

[Lucy68]

Wow, what a husband you have! I'm so glad you two got back together. Keep seeking to know God better and working on building a close relationship with your husband.

Be positive and look toward the FUTURE ...not the past. You've been forgiven and you have the gift of a child to look forward to.

And don't blame God for ANYTHING. That always back-fires