Need help with my family situation

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AmyHannah92

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I have very recently found god and I'm still learning and I'm still repenting for my sins. My main concern is that because I have spent a lot of my life living for myself and not for Christ I have had children out of marriage. I have been with the children's father for 7 years. And obviously we have had sex before marriage/children before marriage. I was clueless and just another person wrapped up in the world as it is today to even know that I was doing wrong. Can I ever be forgiven? I am currently engaged and marriage is my next step in life. Although at the time I didn't realise I wasn't doing wrong, now I do and I feel like I'm such a disappointment to God and Christ.
 
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Remember how disappointing your children were to you when they took that first step and then fell down? Wasn't that everlasting agony? Why couldn't they just get up and walk like everyone else? I mean, what was wrong with them? Remember that?

No? Good! Because that's not what happened.

Didn't you get all excited because your baby took a first step? Didn't you know it wasn't going to be perfect and your little one was going to keep trying, but, man! That first step was magnificent, wasn't it? And wasn't it great seeing the child grow into steps? And then a bit of trotting? And then running all around the house? Yeah?

If you can remember the joys of your children trying and doing some succeeding with some failure to go along with it, then why not realize God sees the same thing in you? He helped you take that first step after watching you so long doing things that weren't good for you. He's more excited with that first step than you were for your kids, and loves you more than even you love your kids. (I am fully aware you love your kids completely. God does that too, but he also does perfectly, so he's got all of us beat on loving. Hard to believe when we realize how much we love too, but true.)

You are the adopted daughter of the one and only God. No small thing. AND he chose YOU. So, yeah, he is fully aware of what messes his kids are before accepting us into adoption and working to change us.

Not "disappointed." LOVE! He's glowing! He's the very proud poppa, because he made the choices and all is going exactly as he planned it.
 
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Thankyou for your reply depleted! I have a tear in my eye reading this. And you're totally right, I didn't see it like that before. I love my children more than words could explain. I feel now that when I ask for forgiveness that I will be forgiven. Thankyou for explaining it like that.