Singles...we need to have a talk

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
L

Lecrae

Guest
#1
#1
What I've noticed in life, and this forum, is that singles tend to feel depressed because they are single and are not with their possible future spouse. Yes, I'm guilty of that too. Singlehood isn't meant to be depressing, it's meant to be a time where you're getting closer to God. Once you develop that strong relationship with God is when I believe we should start looking for someone (and when God helps lead them to us). As Psalms 37:4 says, "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart."

So the main point is this: While we're single, we should be using that time to be delighting ourselves in God, not being depressed because we're single and lonely.
 
J

Jeanette19

Guest
#2
#2
This was very comforting to me. Thank You.
 
P

preschoolteacher24

Guest
#3
#3
Lecrae said:
What I've noticed in life, and this forum, is that singles tend to feel depressed because they are single and are not with their possible future spouse. Yes, I'm guilty of that too. Singlehood isn't meant to be depressing, it's meant to be a time where you're getting closer to God. Once you develop that strong relationship with God is when I believe we should start looking for someone (and when God helps lead them to us). As Psalms 37:4 says, "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart."

So the main point is this: While we're single, we should be using that time to be delighting ourselves in God, not being depressed because we're single and lonely.
Click to expand...
Couldn't of put it better really. I mean I talked too guys before the second they find out I was a believer they disapear and i get down but one day I was like no more why I'm I down god has that special someone out there for me.
 
A

Adrianv125

Senior Member
#4
Jan 17, 2011
567
12
18
#4
You are right on the money lecrae. If a human being's source of joy and peace isn't God, then that person will suffer much, because though having the one person that God has prepared for you is an awesome thing, having her or him will really not fulfill your fullness of joy. That only comes from God, and if you cannot realize that yet then you will either find it out the easy or the hard way. I learned the hard way, but now I rest in the finished work of Christ :)
 
Y

yaright

Guest
#5
#5
I like the statement and the replies. It's true, there are times when 'feeling single' plays a rough game with my mind. I am not kidding when I say I get a great please out of talking with people. One of my problems is that I tend to talk quite a bit concerning the things of faith and where faith led me. I tend to like to hear the exchange concerning the witness of a person's life. In the beginnings of friendships, I feel a need to see that it's okay to speak this way. Once that is done, I tend to feel more relaxed, knowing I'm in the company of someone who's faith matters to them. Yep, got a few years on me, but I still like sharing life; even like I'm doing right here, right now....
 
G

GreenNnice

Guest
#6
#6
Lecrae said:
What I've noticed in life, and this forum, is that singles tend to feel depressed because they are single and are not with their possible future spouse. Yes, I'm guilty of that too. Singlehood isn't meant to be depressing, it's meant to be a time where you're getting closer to God. Once you develop that strong relationship with God is when I believe we should start looking for someone (and when God helps lead them to us). As Psalms 37:4 says, "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart."

So the main point is this: While we're single, we should be using that time to be delighting ourselves in God, not being depressed because we're single and lonely.
Click to expand...
-----
17 and life.

I hope you realize that , as a believer, all you say and do comes from God.

You've got it pegged at a young age.

God bless you, Lord-led-Lecrae , sounds like you indeed are delighting in the fact that whatever lot is your life it is where God is with you and there the work is to be done cheerfully and faithfully and with pure joyful delight :)

Amen! Thank you, wise, young, brother in Christ.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
P

persecuted

Banned
#7
Jun 15, 2011
308
0
0
#7
lol... I always thought it was more like...

when we're kids we're supposed to wish we were adults.

when we're teens we're supposed to wish we were old enough to drink.

when we're in college we're supposed to wish we had money and an income.

then when we get that job we're supposed to wish we had the freedoms of childhood, teen years, and college.

so continuing.....

when we are single we are supposed to be depressed that we're alone.

and then when we get married we're supposed to be depressed because we're stuck with our awful trap of a spouse.

In fact I think we're just always supposed to be depressed wishing we were somewhere else.
 
L

Lecrae

Guest
#8
#8
persecuted said:
lol... I always thought it was more like...

when we're kids we're supposed to wish we were adults.

when we're teens we're supposed to wish we were old enough to drink.

when we're in college we're supposed to wish we had money and an income.

then when we get that job we're supposed to wish we had the freedoms of childhood, teen years, and college.

so continuing.....

when we are single we are supposed to be depressed that we're alone.

and then when we get married we're supposed to be depressed because we're stuck with our awful trap of a spouse.

In fact I think we're just always supposed to be depressed wishing we were somewhere else.
Click to expand...

Correction: We're always so depressed if we're relying on the world to bring us pleasure. We will always be disappointed if we don't put God in the picture.
 
G

GreenNnice

Guest
#9
#9
Lecrae said:
Correction: We're always so depressed if we're relying on the world to bring us pleasure. We will always be disappointed if we don't put God in the picture.
Click to expand...
---
Again, well said, LLL. THAT is how we press on, we depress the switch with God in the 'box.'
Ready, ok, focus, focus. On 3, say 'God,'.

1,2.... click. :)
 
K

kayem77

Guest
#10
#10
Lecrae said:
Correction: We're always so depressed if we're relying on the world to bring us pleasure. We will always be disappointed if we don't put God in the picture.
Click to expand...
Couldn't agree more with you! God bless:)
 
F

FireWire

Guest
#11
#11
Being single and depressed about it is practical atheism. If you're focusing on why you're single and why you don't have a mate then you're moving away from God. When you move away from God things start to break down into chaos. If you're obsessed about it then it would have to be idolatry.
 
K

Kate-e-Kat

Guest
#12
#12
It's not that bad to be single. :)
 
P

preciousgirl

Guest
#13
#13
But why is it that true born single finds it difficult to find the right man? i am single born again ve being praying n praying for the right man
am very down to earth,loyal,caring loving single never being married hard working but is the right man not coming?
 
L

Liz01

Guest
#14
#14
What surprise me a lot, is that i have met a lot of married ppl that are tired to be married and want to be single and alone, and we as singles we want to be married lol, so thanks lecrae for this thread , i agree with you :)
 
F

FlowerFragance

Guest
#15
#15
YOU'RE SO RIGHT We need to have fulfillment in the Lord!... We are supposed to be happy and blessed with or without a spouse, because they are not supposed to be the REASON of our JOY, but will be the ones who will share that JOY and will help us grow to be conformed to GOD's image. Our spouses will be a blessing that will come in THE RIGHT TIME.. We should pray for them even before we meet them, but have our hearts in fire for the Lord, living for Him and He will answer our prayers in the right time. Be conscious of this: Your future spouse needs to be prepared for you as you need to be prepared for him/her, so keep that in your prayers too. If God has not given you an Spouse He knows when it's the right time!! God bless you.
 
L

Lecrae

Guest
#16
#16
preciousgirl said:
But why is it that true born single finds it difficult to find the right man? i am single born again ve being praying n praying for the right man
am very down to earth,loyal,caring loving single never being married hard working but is the right man not coming?
Click to expand...
There are a few reasons for that. Maybe your future spouse is not born again and you won't find him until God is complete with him. Or maybe he's just not mature enough, or emotionally stable for a relationship so God isn't leading you to him yet.

Or, God may also be teaching you patients. There are a lot of reasons why this may be. I'm still waiting to meet my significant other as well, but I'm not going to get inpatient because she may not be ready for me yet. :)
 
T

thimsrebma

Guest
#17
#17
I do agree Lecrae. But at the same time most of us singles are older. Some of us have been praying for a spouse for many years and others do feel they are not quite ready yet.

I believe that many of us want to use this as a time to grow closer to God and to learn more about ourselves, but you do that throughout your life whether you are single married, parenting or childless.

To all of you teen singles, I don't mean to be offensive but I never really look at you as singles. To me you are still youths/children and most not nearly ready to be married. But as you get older and start having stronger desire for it, some of you will watch person after person wed and have children and you will begin to feel left out. Like your life is at a stand still or maybe you are having a fun great adventure but want someone to share it with.

Its easy to say that we should all be concerned about having a strong relationship with God, but what people really need to know is HOW to do that, HOW to be happy in our current circumstances while we are waiting for them to change, HOW to push thru those days of loneliness, how to go to 3 baby showers in a month and control your own hormones.

Knowledge is pretty simple. Its application and synthesis that is hard.
 
Liamson

Liamson

Senior Member
#18
Feb 3, 2010
3,078
69
48
#18
thimsrebma said:
I do agree Lecrae. But at the same time most of us singles are older. Some of us have been praying for a spouse for many years and others do feel they are not quite ready yet.

I believe that many of us want to use this as a time to grow closer to God and to learn more about ourselves, but you do that throughout your life whether you are single married, parenting or childless.

To all of you teen singles, I don't mean to be offensive but I never really look at you as singles. To me you are still youths/children and most not nearly ready to be married. But as you get older and start having stronger desire for it, some of you will watch person after person wed and have children and you will begin to feel left out. Like your life is at a stand still or maybe you are having a fun great adventure but want someone to share it with.

Its easy to say that we should all be concerned about having a strong relationship with God, but what people really need to know is HOW to do that, HOW to be happy in our current circumstances while we are waiting for them to change, HOW to push thru those days of loneliness, how to go to 3 baby showers in a month and control your own hormones.

Knowledge is pretty simple. Its application and synthesis that is hard.
Click to expand...

Yeah, baby showers have the opposite effect on my hormones.

How I maintain a strong relationship with God, even though I'm single is that I make plans and dream of ways that I can serve Him passionately.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.