hi am a single parent and my daughter is 16yrs and want to meet the dad.my mum is against it for she has supported us all along and is asking where has he being all this years for called me.I was to meet with him we discuss but he want to come at my place or we go somewhere during the night i said No for i knew this is a set to have sex.I said we meet during the day at an open place but has never communicated.He has a wife and children and i respect that for know my stand in God but am concern about my daughter for want to meet him.what do i do someone advice me especially you have been in this situation even those who have not faced this i will apreciate thank you.
some advice please on single parenting.
- Thread starter cate
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U
Well, your mothers attitude is wrong. If it were the father making the request, then i could understand if she were to feel how she does. However this is the daughters choice, this is something she feels she needs and it has nothing to do with who has been paying. It has to do with your daughter wanting to meet her father. Maybe one meeting will be enough and she'll decide she doesn't want him in her life. But if its what SHE wants then its not your mothers call, because its not a financial or support issue.
Going by your moms demands, you only hurt your daughter.
But you are wise in not meeting him in private. Keep that up.
Going by your moms demands, you only hurt your daughter.
But you are wise in not meeting him in private. Keep that up.
C
I dont see how your daughters request to see her father makes it right for her to meet him. Your the adult. Dont be a friend to her be the parent. Your mom is right,the fact that he hasnt been around for the past 16 years should tell you something about him. Plus it seems he doesnt want to meet you unless its at a place where he can suduce you.Do you really want your daughter to be around a guy like that?
Im wondering if you know any thing about the way he treats his wife and kids. You already know he wants to cheat on his wife with you.
In the USA we have a name for a guy like this hes called "a deadbeat dad"
Im wondering if you know any thing about the way he treats his wife and kids. You already know he wants to cheat on his wife with you.
In the USA we have a name for a guy like this hes called "a deadbeat dad"
U
Because there's a psychological element of this on her daughters end. If its what the daughter wants, she going to do it one way or another. She can do it now with her mothers support or she can wait til shes older and doesn't need anyone's permission, and may not have anyone's support either. He may be a jerk and not worth meeting, but sometimes kids need to see this for themselves. This has nothing to do with 'being a friend' to the child.