J
Jordache
Guest
I am so blessed by the mercy of God today. I have been leading worship now for 10 years. I have been called to worship ministry and have a gift for ministry in general. I live and breathe worship and music. It makes me feel alive. I find the Lord through it in a more profound way than any other activity. I know that worship leading is a huge call on my life. But... I did something really stupid, bad, horrendous, etc a few days ago. I knew when the mistake was made that I had to confess it. I spoke with my worship pastor bright and early the following morning. I then texted my head pastor, but wasn't able to see him until the following day when he picked me up for church. I also told a few woman friends, but I was so humilated and terrified of what would happen. My friend got herself in a similar tangle though admittedly much worse, and she was removed from the worship team for over a year. She grew a lot, but she had to endure a lot of people's gossip and confrontations. I was really dreading what my consequences would be. On Sunday we were singing a song asking God for His mercy, and at that point I didn't even want God's mercy because I felt so much shame. But over the next few days, I found myself tearfully begging for His mercy. A year off the team would kill me. 6 months was as short as I thought and was advized that they would go.
I woke up this morning and began cutting and scratching myself, but I stopped. I met with the pastors and the meeting went well. After much conversation we discussed my consequences. I will be off the team for 2 months, and I still get to sing for Christmas. That was more mercy than I ever expected!
I woke up this morning and began cutting and scratching myself, but I stopped. I met with the pastors and the meeting went well. After much conversation we discussed my consequences. I will be off the team for 2 months, and I still get to sing for Christmas. That was more mercy than I ever expected!