To Pm or not to Pm

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DeepBlue1980

Guest
#1
#1
Hi all i'm a relative newbie to this site and I sometimes go into chat and think do I or dont I try to contact people as I find chatting in the main room a little bit intimidating with everyone knowing eachother. My question is are there others like myself who would like to chat but find it hard to in the main room but are also nervous about Pm people and thier possible reaction. I know myself that im a good person inside and I would love to be able to get to know people genuinly. Is there a pre conception that people are more wary of pm's due to spamers and the like?
 
Pheonix

Pheonix

Senior Member
#2
Jan 17, 2007
578
7
18
#2
well there certainly are spammers, but they are far and few between. as always you have to be careful when doing pm, and there are some people who have posted that they don't pm unless they know you. I've found it best to just watch the conversation and see if a subject comes up you find interesting.

I've actaully been away from the chat for near 4 years although I was still in the forums, and there is only one person I recognize from my time there, that's the mod roboop.

So good luck, have fun and always becareful
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#3
Aug 2, 2009
24,581
4,269
113
#3
My best advice is to go into the bible study room, ask a lot of questions and agree with what people are saying. You'll make friends quickly. :)

Asking questions in chat or in the forums will usually get you noticed.
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#4
#4
DeepBlue1980 said:
Hi all i'm a relative newbie to this site and I sometimes go into chat and think do I or dont I try to contact people as I find chatting in the main room a little bit intimidating with everyone knowing eachother. My question is are there others like myself who would like to chat but find it hard to in the main room but are also nervous about Pm people and thier possible reaction. I know myself that im a good person inside and I would love to be able to get to know people genuinly. Is there a pre conception that people are more wary of pm's due to spamers and the like?
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Hello :)

I have a hard time talking in large groups of people, that includes on the internet in chat rooms and in real life.
So i dont contribute to the conversations going on in the chat rooms. I myself have an easier time talking to someone one on one.
 
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DeepBlue1980

Guest
#5
#5
Thanks for the advice all. I'm pretty shy and isolated in real life so I thought this would be a great way to meet new people. Will definatly try these ideas and see if they work so a big thanks to all.
 
J0Y

J0Y

Senior Member
#6
Mar 7, 2009
509
6
18
#6
I have been on CC for a long time now and I still can find it intimidating in the room when conversations are going on with apparent 'friends.' I think as has been said it is good if you can contribute to a topic and then maybe find at least one person talking to you in the main chat. Often if the room is full and no-one is taking any notice of my attempts to get someone to chat to me I will go and surf all the other rooms on CC to find out what is going on in there. Sometimes if there are only 5 or 6 people in a room they are more willing to get to know you or get into a good discussion.

I guess the more that you are in the chat room and the more you talk to people the better it will be for you. Talking on microphone gets you more noticed too, though some do not like doing this. Just be patient and look for opportunities to contribute and then once you get to know one or two then start making a point of acknowledging them when you are here and asking how they are etc. :)
 
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Jullianna

Guest
#7
#7
I talk in the main room mostly when I do talk. I probably listen/read more than I talk. Seems like it leads to fewer online issues. I don't mind PMs for the most part, except for the following:

- People who say "hi" repeatedly and nothing more no matter now much you respond
- Married men who will only PM and not participate in group discussions or give the impression they are up to no good
- People who can clearly see I'm involved in a conversation with other people in main chat and rudely interrupt that. Surely someone wouldn't do that in person, so why do it in chat? Just sayin...it's rude. Did I mention that it's RUDE!? :)
 
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Boanerges

Guest
#8
#8
Just Pm, the world wont blow up, at least not before the second PM
 
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See_KING_Truth

Guest
#9
#9
I do not do a lot of PMing unless I am familiar with a person. I do not PM people unless they are involved in the main chat, there are exceptions. I also do not pm a lot because it can be a distraction if I am involved in the main chat, which I usually am.

Most people are cautious with random PMs from people who aren't talking in the main room. Honor peoples' private chat notices. If they say they don't talk to people they don't know or people who don't chat in the main room, then respect that. Don't be intimidated, we are a friendly bunch here...for the most part lol.
 
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Ugly

Guest
#10
#10
A lot of the problem is there are some serious cliques on this site, and once they take over a room no one has a chance.
 
Dude653

Dude653

Senior Member
#11
Mar 19, 2011
12,312
1,039
113
#11
I dont understand why people are like ''Dont pm me!!! Pm's are evil!"" quit bein so dang stuck up!!! if people are spamming or creeping or whatever,, that's what the ignore function is for.
 
alex1987

alex1987

Banned
#12
Jan 15, 2011
24
1
0
#12
About pm yeah. Respect other people an no creepers
 
cozy

cozy

Senior Member
#13
Jan 18, 2010
140
12
18
#13
I appreciate being asked in the main room first if I don't know someone
 
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ak_82

Guest
#15
#15
Pming can be a great way to get to know someone on a deeper level, but I find it definitely helps if you have some sort of connection with the other person before you start to chat. I've made some really great friends on here and also met some people who have been questionable. Just be careful and don't share any info that makes you uncomfortable. :)
 
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Kooper

Guest
#16
#16
DeepBlue1980 said:
Hi all i'm a relative newbie to this site and I sometimes go into chat and think do I or dont I try to contact people as I find chatting in the main room a little bit intimidating with everyone knowing eachother. My question is are there others like myself who would like to chat but find it hard to in the main room but are also nervous about Pm people and thier possible reaction. I know myself that im a good person inside and I would love to be able to get to know people genuinly. Is there a pre conception that people are more wary of pm's due to spamers and the like?
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I'm a loner as well. I try to be a good person. 62% of the time I can be, but it's the other 48% I'm not so sure of. And that's only an estimate... That good factor could be a little lower... Unless I'm selling myself short. Which something I seriously doubt.

NodMyHeadLikeYeah said:
Hello :)

I have a hard time talking in large groups of people, that includes on the internet in chat rooms and in real life.
So i dont contribute to the conversations going on in the chat rooms. I myself have an easier time talking to someone one on one.
Click to expand...
I'm the same. I can concentrate better when I'm talking to one person. Gives me more of a chance to be honest with one person instead of me trying to be a scatter-brained baffoon to multiple recipetants

Ugly said:
A lot of the problem is there are some serious cliques on this site, and once they take over a room no one has a chance.
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Yeah... I wish I had friends. :( Oh well, might as well... walk that lonely road... The only one that I have ever known... I don't know where it goes... But it's home to me and I walk alone...


xD
(I'm really bored)
 
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