Virginity, purity(may not be appropriate for kids)

[Chopsui101]

I don't understand this issue with people saying they will only marry a virgin. Seriously, call me a man whore or whatever. Like me, I set what I am looking for in a girl friend the same as a wife, and I don't compromise. If she has had sex before or not, as long as it isn't in an extreme, and that is up for everyone to decide, I don't really care. I am not dating/marrying her so I can take her virginity. I am dating her because I like her, as a person. Honestly, I have tons of flaws, and I bet every girl friend I have ever had wishes that she could just date the good parts of me. But, its a combo package the good with the bad.

I don't understand this no physical thing until marriage. Like, as a human being we crave physical touch, even as young babies. So to say suddenly we need to abstain from physical contract, my belief is that we should be as physical as we feel comfortable being. I think that there are benefits as well as set backs from every choice. Its all in what you deem as important. I personally would never date a girl that I thought was scandalous, but what is scandalous in my opinion might not be in someone else's eyes.

And I really don't get the porn stuff. Its a way to relieve stress and is clinically proven to help lower stress levels in both men and women to...yea..you get the picture. But honestly its called hormones its a natural thing.

Like I have my standards that I set for myself, based on what I think God wants for me. This is gathered through research and my own personal convictions. If you want to be a virgin until marriage I think that is good for you. If you want to save your first kiss until the alter that is good for you. If you want to hold the other persons hand for the first time at the alter good for you. If you want to see the person for the first time when you are getting married good for you.

 

[Baptistrw]

22 Abstain from all appearance of evil. 1 Thess 5:21-22 (KJV)


3 I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes
Psalms 101:3 (KJV)


28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. 29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. 30 And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
Matt 5:28-30 (KJV)


3 For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication: 4 That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour
1 Thess 4:2-4 (KJV)

 

[Baptistrw]

I don't understand this issue with people saying they will only marry a virgin. Seriously, call me a man whore or whatever. Like me, I set what I am looking for in a girl friend the same as a wife, and I don't compromise. If she has had sex before or not, as long as it isn't in an extreme, and that is up for everyone to decide, I don't really care. I am not dating/marrying her so I can take her virginity. I am dating her because I like her, as a person. Honestly, I have tons of flaws, and I bet every girl friend I have ever had wishes that she could just date the good parts of me. But, its a combo package the good with the bad.

I don't understand this no physical thing until marriage. Like, as a human being we crave physical touch, even as young babies. So to say suddenly we need to abstain from physical contract, my belief is that we should be as physical as we feel comfortable being. I think that there are benefits as well as set backs from every choice. Its all in what you deem as important. I personally would never date a girl that I thought was scandalous, but what is scandalous in my opinion might not be in someone else's eyes.

And I really don't get the porn stuff. Its a way to relieve stress and is clinically proven to help lower stress levels in both men and women to...yea..you get the picture. But honestly its called hormones its a natural thing.

Like I have my standards that I set for myself, based on what I think God wants for me. This is gathered through research and my own personal convictions. If you want to be a virgin until marriage I think that is good for you. If you want to save your first kiss until the alter that is good for you. If you want to hold the other persons hand for the first time at the alter good for you. If you want to see the person for the first time when you are getting married good for you.

Are you endorsing the use of pornography? Having hormones doesn't give one a license to sin. Pornography is one of the most damaging sins there is, it completely rewires the brain and is virtually unfixable, not to mention it is addictive and has destroyed millions of lives and families. And that's without adding to it the Bibles teachings on lust.

 

[godsgirl20]

Hey, yeah i think that sex outside of marriage isnt the best idea its not what God planned from the beggining.
I grew up in a christian home and all that stuff but i am not a virgin and i regret it... i wish that i would have waited.
i agree with you on setting your boundries what feels right with u and God and all that but God is verry clear in the bible that we are
to save our bodys for the person we marry.... i think of it in two ways 1. its like u got a papper heart and everytime ur with someone and everytime u do something with that person its like ripping off a peice of ur heart and u give alot away and then what are you gonna have to share with your wife when u marry her? cause it will be like marrying every girl uve done something with.... im not saying ur bad in any way shape or form...
we all got boundries we set and just cause somethings right for someone else doesnt mean u gotta do what they do... but my 2nt point is its like a dirty bandaid when u have sex before marriage its like u take a dirty bandaid and reuse it over and over with different people...
just some thoughs to think about

 

[1still_waters]

I don't understand this issue with people saying they will only marry a virgin. Seriously, call me a man whore or whatever. Like me, I set what I am looking for in a girl friend the same as a wife, and I don't compromise. If she has had sex before or not, as long as it isn't in an extreme, and that is up for everyone to decide, I don't really care. I am not dating/marrying her so I can take her virginity. I am dating her because I like her, as a person. Honestly, I have tons of flaws, and I bet every girl friend I have ever had wishes that she could just date the good parts of me. But, its a combo package the good with the bad.

I don't understand this no physical thing until marriage. Like, as a human being we crave physical touch, even as young babies. So to say suddenly we need to abstain from physical contract, my belief is that we should be as physical as we feel comfortable being. I think that there are benefits as well as set backs from every choice. Its all in what you deem as important. I personally would never date a girl that I thought was scandalous, but what is scandalous in my opinion might not be in someone else's eyes.

And I really don't get the porn stuff. Its a way to relieve stress and is clinically proven to help lower stress levels in both men and women to...yea..you get the picture. But honestly its called hormones its a natural thing.

Like I have my standards that I set for myself, based on what I think God wants for me. This is gathered through research and my own personal convictions. If you want to be a virgin until marriage I think that is good for you. If you want to save your first kiss until the alter that is good for you. If you want to hold the other persons hand for the first time at the alter good for you. If you want to see the person for the first time when you are getting married good for you.

Christians believe the Bible is given to us by God, so we can live in relationship with Him. We believe his guidelines are for our own good (although trust me, it's hard to believe this at times).

I understand that modern science and psychology has shown the human need for sex. But psychology has misapplied their findings when measured against the Bible.

Our Bible clearly says sex is meant for marriage. This isn't meant to rob our joy and fun (but yeah it sure feels like it at times), rather it's for our own good. If you believe God is an all knowing and wise father and that he expressed his will to us through the Bible, then it's a must that you accept and submit to what he's commanded.

Our Bible says that if you are burning with a desire for sex, then by all means, find yourself a wife! Don't just get a wife for sex of course.

In all, remember this is about a loving God, wanting the best for us. This isn't about a tyrannical control freak off in heaven trying to rob you of joy and fun.

 

[Abing]

I don't understand this issue with people saying they will only marry a virgin. Seriously, call me a man whore or whatever. Like me, I set what I am looking for in a girl friend the same as a wife, and I don't compromise. If she has had sex before or not, as long as it isn't in an extreme, and that is up for everyone to decide, I don't really care. I am not dating/marrying her so I can take her virginity. I am dating her because I like her, as a person. Honestly, I have tons of flaws, and I bet every girl friend I have ever had wishes that she could just date the good parts of me. But, its a combo package the good with the bad.

I don't understand this no physical thing until marriage. Like, as a human being we crave physical touch, even as young babies. So to say suddenly we need to abstain from physical contract, my belief is that we should be as physical as we feel comfortable being. I think that there are benefits as well as set backs from every choice. Its all in what you deem as important. I personally would never date a girl that I thought was scandalous, but what is scandalous in my opinion might not be in someone else's eyes.

And I really don't get the porn stuff. Its a way to relieve stress and is clinically proven to help lower stress levels in both men and women to...yea..you get the picture. But honestly its called hormones its a natural thing.

Like I have my standards that I set for myself, based on what I think God wants for me. This is gathered through research and my own personal convictions. If you want to be a virgin until marriage I think that is good for you. If you want to save your first kiss until the alter that is good for you. If you want to hold the other persons hand for the first time at the alter good for you. If you want to see the person for the first time when you are getting married good for you.

I don't think it's about what we think it is. The bible is clear about it.

 

[Slepsog4]

Paul told Timothy to treat older women as mothers and younger women as sisters with ABSOLUTE PURITY. No man has a right to look upon or treat a woman like a wife unless she is. By this I mean that human sexuality is to be exercised ONLY in the heterosexual covenant union of marriage.

Any and all sexual conduct outside of the marriage bed is fornication (sexual immorality).

 

[incorporatestreet]

In the bible it tells you to wait for marriage to have sex.
and when you look at porn, thats lust settling in,
aswell as perversion and ect. not saying that you are a pervert,
but it is a demon.

but when you havent had sex or when you havent looked at porn,
you dont really have the desire to. but once you take that first step
into being impure, then you start to crave it bc you are feeding your flesh
with worldly crap. our body is a temple of god, so we need to keep our
body, soul, mind, heart, and spirit pure so that we can stand up against
this world that wants us to go out and have sex and do things that god doesnt approve of.

im not judging you at all, because well honestly i have been there.
i am not a virgin and i used to be addicted to porn. so i know how this stuff works;
its all of the world. and when it comes to intamicy, god created adam and eve.
eve just for adam. whats the point in dating when god hasnt ordained us to?
where does it say in the bible anything about dating or courting?
adam and eve didnt date. they were made just for each other.

think of it like this:
if you are yellow playdo and you date blue and mess around, then you and blue
break up. then you and red start dating and messing around then break up.
you are left as an ugly brown used piece of playdo.

do you really want to give that to your wife?
that is why people choose to stay pure.
because it is what god says. you are right, we are people
and we can have our own opinions and thoughts, but in the end
humans always tend to mess things up. thats why we need to rely on
god and let him intervene in our lives instead of trying to make everything
right on our own... because we will just end up making a bigger mess for ourselves.

 

[Shoey]

The scriptures are clear when it comes to fornication and adultery. God has a perfect design for humanity. His laws tell us how He intended us to live. His standard judges the intent of our heart. His standard is NOT humanly possible. That is why He sent Jesus to take our debt and His spirit to transform us from the inside out. The question of marrying a virgin is a valid one. Marriages are stronger if the pair were virgins at the start. There are a lot of trust issues that are there when going into a marriage with someone who isn't a virgin. Like this example... if my spouse didn't have the restraint to wait for me, what is going to stop him or her from having the restraint from having an affair, especially if the marriage is an unhappy one.

Ok, so we know that scriptures and the Law says that fornication is bad and unhealthy for us. Where does that leave the non-virgins? Your answer is one person, Jesus. He has already paid the price for that sin. Its done, paid for, He can clean your conscience and renew you. The big thing is recognising that is it sin and to turn away from it. You can't beat it in your own power. Draw close to Jesus and the Holy Spirit and they will give you the power to overcome. That is the promise of His Salvation. The power to supernaturally overcome sin. The closer you are to him the desire to sin becomes less. Its His supernatual work to change the very heart of man. It is a pretty awesome promise.

My question to everyone is, do you want God's best for you? I know He does. So don't settle for second or third best. Save yourself for marriage, because it is His Best for you. And if you haven't, turn to Him and He can redeem and restore. He is a God of restoration!

Lord Bless

 

[Baptistrw]

I don't understand this issue with people saying they will only marry a virgin. Seriously, call me a man whore or whatever. Like me, I set what I am looking for in a girl friend the same as a wife, and I don't compromise. If she has had sex before or not, as long as it isn't in an extreme, and that is up for everyone to decide, I don't really care. I am not dating/marrying her so I can take her virginity. I am dating her because I like her, as a person. Honestly, I have tons of flaws, and I bet every girl friend I have ever had wishes that she could just date the good parts of me. But, its a combo package the good with the bad.

I don't understand this no physical thing until marriage. Like, as a human being we crave physical touch, even as young babies. So to say suddenly we need to abstain from physical contract, my belief is that we should be as physical as we feel comfortable being. I think that there are benefits as well as set backs from every choice. Its all in what you deem as important. I personally would never date a girl that I thought was scandalous, but what is scandalous in my opinion might not be in someone else's eyes.

And I really don't get the porn stuff. Its a way to relieve stress and is clinically proven to help lower stress levels in both men and women to...yea..you get the picture. But honestly its called hormones its a natural thing.

Like I have my standards that I set for myself, based on what I think God wants for me. This is gathered through research and my own personal convictions. If you want to be a virgin until marriage I think that is good for you. If you want to save your first kiss until the alter that is good for you. If you want to hold the other persons hand for the first time at the alter good for you. If you want to see the person for the first time when you are getting married good for you.

Interesting how many times you use the pronoun "I" in your post. Finding out what He says on these matters would be a worthwhile venture.

 

[Pheonix]

The way I see it is this. Sex is supposed to be the glue that cements a marriage together. It is supposed to be the one thing a husband and wife can look at when everything else in their life is going wrong, when they feel they have nothing that is completely theirs, and say that is OURS, and only ours.

As for Porn, I can say from experience Porn is bad. It's highly addicitive and extremely hard to kick. It destroys lives and ruins relationships. It steals from your partner something that is supposed to be theirs. I pray Chopsui101 that you don't learn that the hard way. It warps the mind and your veiw of women changes horribly. You will begin to view women (at best) as objects rather than people, at worst you will see all women as whores. Take it from someone who has been there, get away from it NOW. While you still can.

To everyone else, stay away. Do not go there. The rush doesn't last and you need more every time to get the same rush. ITs like any other drug. In fact if you find it in your house burn it. It isn't worth the paper its written on, and certainly not worth the silicon CD or Hard drive space. Not to mention degrading to women.


Please Chopsui, get it out of your head that Porn is good and natural. It is evil in every way.

 

[greatkraw]

Paul told Timothy to treat older women as mothers and younger women as sisters with ABSOLUTE PURITY. No man has a right to look upon or treat a woman like a wife unless she is. By this I mean that human sexuality is to be exercised ONLY in the heterosexual covenant union of marriage.

Any and all sexual conduct outside of the marriage bed is fornication (sexual immorality).

Excellent post, thank you.

 

[greatkraw]

The way I see it is this. Sex is supposed to be the glue that cements a marriage together. It is supposed to be the one thing a husband and wife can look at when everything else in their life is going wrong, when they feel they have nothing that is completely theirs, and say that is OURS, and only ours.

As for Porn, I can say from experience Porn is bad. It's highly addicitive and extremely hard to kick. It destroys lives and ruins relationships. It steals from your partner something that is supposed to be theirs. I pray Chopsui101 that you don't learn that the hard way. It warps the mind and your veiw of women changes horribly. You will begin to view women (at best) as objects rather than people, at worst you will see all women as whores. Take it from someone who has been there, get away from it NOW. While you still can.

To everyone else, stay away. Do not go there. The rush doesn't last and you need more every time to get the same rush. ITs like any other drug. In fact if you find it in your house burn it. It isn't worth the paper its written on, and certainly not worth the silicon CD or Hard drive space. Not to mention degrading to women.


Please Chopsui, get it out of your head that Porn is good and natural. It is evil in every way.

If ever you are going to believe someone and learn from their experience rather than experiencing for yourself this is the issue.

Eve had 2 competing theories to deal with. Rather than take God at his Word, she conducted her own experiment; and here we are.

Porn has all sorts of traps designed to contaminate your soul and corrupt you.

 

[greatkraw]

im not judging you at all, because well honestly i have been there.
i am not a virgin and i used to be addicted to porn. so i know how this stuff works;
its all of the world. and when it comes to intamicy, god created adam and eve.
eve just for adam. whats the point in dating when god hasnt ordained us to?
where does it say in the bible anything about dating or courting?
adam and eve didnt date. they were made just for each other.

i am curious about a girl being an addict. I did not know this was an issue.

 

[biggentleben]

im not judging you at all, because well honestly i have been there.
i am not a virgin and i used to be addicted to porn. so i know how this stuff works;
its all of the world. and when it comes to intamicy, god created adam and eve.
eve just for adam. whats the point in dating when god hasnt ordained us to?
where does it say in the bible anything about dating or courting?
adam and eve didnt date. they were made just for each other.

i am curious about a girl being an addict. I did not know this was an issue.

oh, it's a huge issue...the numbers are staggering, especially in young women....

easier access to pornography has taken viewing pornography from the thing you had to go to a dark corner of the store to purchase to something you can do in the secrecy of your own home....and the hidden aspect of it is what adds to the addictive affect....

 

[PenguChuck]

Topic started in Feb 9th, user already banned.

Don't think he is getting any of this fine advice thats getting passed around.

 

[stillwaiting4the1]

Topic started in Feb 9th, user already banned.

Don't think he is getting any of this fine advice thats getting passed around.

And it sounds like it was much needed advice. That's ashamed.