What if you can't forgive yourself of your sin?

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K

Kw

Guest
#1
#1
To make a long story short a I conceived a child out of adultery and I don't know whether the child is my husbands or the other mans. Though the lord has forgiven me I still cannot seem to forgive myself because I constantly have a reminder of my sin. I need to know how to look at this as a blessing if it's not my husbands. Why would the lord allow me to Conceive and open my womb to be fruitful after a long time of trying an praying to have a baby before I commited this horrible sin. I've been getting closer to the lord and I don't doubt his goodness just sometimes it hits me hard . Just not knowing and going through this pain is punishment enough. Does God have a purpose for everything? I just need prayer and encouragement . Thank you
 
D

DiscipleWilliam

Guest
#2
#2
The sins that we commit adversely affect us especially adultery. Now I'm not saying that God cannot forgive you of that sin but there are consequences one will reap for sowing to the flesh. Oftentimes when we sin the results and impressions of that particular transgression will linger with us for the rest of our lives. This is why we are to flee sexual immorality. But what's done, is done. The important thing is to continually grow in Christ and in doing so mortify the deeds of the flesh. I will admit that I've done things that I will have to live with also but there is forgiveness in Christ. Just remember, salvation is a manifestation of grace and a gift of unmerited favour shown upon us (the elect) by a loving God and that's what we should rejoice in :) I will pray for you my sister.
 
M

MaggieMye

Guest
#3
#3
To make a long story short a I conceived a child out of adultery and I don't know whether the child is my husbands or the other mans. Though the lord has forgiven me I still cannot seem to forgive myself because I constantly have a reminder of my sin. Calling your CHILD a reminder of your sin will damage him/her more than you can ever know. ALL children are FRUIT of the womb! ALL children are the heritage of the Lord and you need to remind yourself of that. I need to know how to look at this as a blessing if it's not my husbands. Consider that it is a child that GOD has created WITH A PURPOSE AND A DESTINY. Will you stand in the way of that destiny or will your bless your child, your inheritance from the Lord, with love and wisdom? Why would the lord allow me to Conceive and open my womb to be fruitful after a long time of trying an praying to have a baby before I commited this horrible sin. Why do you doubt His soverienty? Why do you doubt that He has a plan for THIS CHILD? I've been getting closer to the lord and I don't doubt his goodness just sometimes it hits me hard . You MUST understand that GUILT is from the devil. If you are feeling guilty it is because you are allowing Satan to override what God's word says about you and your child. It is a form of unbelief. TAKE AUTHORITY over this evil, lying spirit and tell it to leave in the name of Jesus Christ! Just not knowing and going through this pain is punishment enough. Does God have a purpose for everything? Absolutely! He works to the good for ALL that love Him. You made a mistake and sinned. A result of this was a baby. God has a plan for the child. But YOU...YOU need to get tight with God and learn about who YOU are in Christ so that you can teach your child who he/she is in Christ and fulfill the destiny that they have been created for. God knew you were going to do what you did. The choice was yours. NOW, you can continue to follow your plans or His. What does your husband say of the situation? I just need prayer and encouragement . Got it!Thank you :)
 
shemaiah

shemaiah

Senior Member
#4
Jan 28, 2011
2,233
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#4
Many are the times we sin, and though God forgives us, we choose not to forgive ourselves thus drawing ourselves away from God himself and all that He has planned. The bible says that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8: 1) and you have to take that stand (you are forgiven) and let God have His way in you, so that His love may shine in you and through you. I will pray for you sister!
 
pickles

pickles

Senior Member
#5
Apr 20, 2009
14,479
182
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#5
You do need to forgive yourself. :)
Ask yourself this, was not Jesus's suffering the cross not enough?
He did this, so you are forgiven through your repentance. :)
Consider looking at this child as a reminder of this gift , blessing, in Jesus.
Praise and thank Jesus, God Our Father for everything.
Jesus will fill you with His joy of salvation.

Hugs and God bless.
pickles
 
A

AnandaHya

Guest
#6
#6
Kw said:
To make a long story short a I conceived a child out of adultery and I don't know whether the child is my husbands or the other mans. Though the lord has forgiven me I still cannot seem to forgive myself because I constantly have a reminder of my sin. I need to know how to look at this as a blessing if it's not my husbands. Why would the lord allow me to Conceive and open my womb to be fruitful after a long time of trying an praying to have a baby before I commited this horrible sin. I've been getting closer to the lord and I don't doubt his goodness just sometimes it hits me hard . Just not knowing and going through this pain is punishment enough. Does God have a purpose for everything? I just need prayer and encouragement . Thank you
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you need to stop seeing yourself through your eyes and your flesh and see who you are in Christ.

this song comes to mind and the line that says "I say guilty, You say forgiven....if only I believe the truth about me....."

The Truth About Me Mandisa (lyrics) - YouTube

you need not only for yourself and your life to forgive yourself but for the sake of your child. if you continue to hold bitterness in your heart then it will cause you to not treat and love and interact with your child as you should, because you will not be able with your WHOLE heart recognize the bueaty and blessing God has given you to care for. Remember the child your body bore is NOT yours but GOD's and He has trusted you to care for that little soul. It is a responsiblity God gave you with love. you are not to look into his or her eyes and think of YOUR sins for that is selfish, instead focus on God's love. how God loves this little one and you should do the same.

I hope that doesn't sound like a lecture. it is things I say to myself when I look at my kids and feel overwhelmed and unworthy of the responsibility. I remember God's promise.

2 Peter 1

2 Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord, 3 as His divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue, 4 by which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises, that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.
5 But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, 6 to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, 7 to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love. 8 For if these things are yours and abound, you will be neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 For he who lacks these things is shortsighted, even to blindness, and has forgotten that he was cleansed from his old sins.

Will keep you in my prayers. Pm me if you want to talk more privately.
Love your sister in Christ.
 
C

Consumed

Guest
#7
#7
Kw
I pray God helps you forgive yourself. Remember when we are broken and down hearted and call to God, the devil plays his trump card for it's all he has in his desperation to stop you going boldly before God, that is self condemnation, yet truth be told as it says in scripture Romans 8:1 there is no condemnation. Stand on what God says about you, take thoughts captive that try to exalt itself above what God says and cast them down.
Be strong, your forgiven, walk in confidence knowing you are, believe. 
 
loveschild

loveschild

Banned
#8
May 21, 2009
3,955
25
0
#8
Kw said:
To make a long story short a I conceived a child out of adultery and I don't know whether the child is my husbands or the other mans. Though the lord has forgiven me I still cannot seem to forgive myself because I constantly have a reminder of my sin. I need to know how to look at this as a blessing if it's not my husbands. Why would the lord allow me to Conceive and open my womb to be fruitful after a long time of trying an praying to have a baby before I commited this horrible sin. I've been getting closer to the lord and I don't doubt his goodness just sometimes it hits me hard . Just not knowing and going through this pain is punishment enough. Does God have a purpose for everything? I just need prayer and encouragement . Thank you
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To make a long story short a I conceived a child out of adultery and I don't know whether the child is my husbands or the other mans. Though the lord has forgiven me I still cannot seem to forgive myself because I constantly have a reminder of my sin.


You did this. Now you love your baby. The baby is a treasure. Don't blame the baby for what you did. Are you hiding this from your husband? You need to come clean. Tell the truth. If your husband wants to forgive he can if he doesn't. You pray for him to forgive so he doesn't maybe go to hell because of what you did.

I need to know how to look at this as a blessing if it's not my husbands.

You should have thought of that before you ran off cheating on your husband. Why would the lord allow me to Conceive and open my womb to be fruitful after a long time of trying an praying to have a baby before I commited this horrible sin.

Your actually trying to blame God because you did wrong.

I've been getting closer to the lord and I don't doubt his goodness just sometimes it hits me hard . Just not knowing and going through this pain is punishment enough. Does God have a purpose for everything? I just need prayer and encouragement . Thank you

Face up to what you did. I'm not trying to be mean to you. We do things wrong. You did something wrong and now you are living in quilt. Stop living in denial and trying to blame everyone except yourself and give it all to God. God does forgive you. We pray your husband will forgive you and love the baby if the baby is not his. If you lose your husband over this we pray strength for all of you.

Part of being set free is to to tell the truth of the matter. God bless you all so much. Father give this young lady your strength. your wisdom and grace Lord in Jesus aman.

 
P

PammyPie147

Guest
#9
#9
Wow, thank you for sharing your personal story and struggles. I hope that this can reach out to someone else and give them hope! We have all done things that cause us to feel shame and guilt. These things are not of the Lord. He never wants us to feel guilty and shameful. We are His beautiful creations and He loves us even though we are sinful. My question is... have you come clean to your husband? I firmly believe that when adultery takes place, both spouses need to know what has happened. Forgiveness needs to take part in both spouses and the marriage covenant restored. There is a process to healing from something like this. I pray that you know that God has forgiven you, you don't need to carry the burdens of your sins that Christ has already gone to the cross for.
 
resurrection33

resurrection33

Banned
#10
Dec 19, 2009
27,513
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#10
Kw said:
To make a long story short a I conceived a child out of adultery and I don't know whether the child is my husbands or the other mans. Though the lord has forgiven me I still cannot seem to forgive myself because I constantly have a reminder of my sin. I need to know how to look at this as a blessing if it's not my husbands. Why would the lord allow me to Conceive and open my womb to be fruitful after a long time of trying an praying to have a baby before I commited this horrible sin. I've been getting closer to the lord and I don't doubt his goodness just sometimes it hits me hard . Just not knowing and going through this pain is punishment enough. Does God have a purpose for everything? I just need prayer and encouragement . Thank you
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Once you stop committing a sin, I think you should be able to forgive yourself.
 
S

Slepsog4

Guest
#11
#11
HELLO... how about finding out for sure if the child is your husband's or not. Part of your inability to forgive yourself is the continued guilty associated with the doubt of whose he is.

Are you going to persist in keeping both your husband and the child in the dark on this??
 
K

Kw

Guest
#12
#12
I never said that I didn't tell my husband. I was just wondering what are the ways to get over guilt from sinful acts. It's not like I committed adultery, confessed , then I can move on with my life . Yes it is my fault, I'm not blaming God . And I did tell my husband before we were going through a divorce and now we are very happy. Its like God fixed my marriage through all of this . It's just a struggle I have with myself . I can't stand myself becuz of what I did and I'm reaping it everyday. My husband has agreed that hes the father no matter what. Yes I am so blessed ! And God is so good. We all make choices without thinking of the consequences sometimes. Sin is sin in Gods eyes whether it is murder , adultery, lust, etc . God doesn't put a title on each one nor does he depict which one is greater. It's just a self struggle , I will love the child it is a part of me but to forgive myself will take time . I fear my husband will be so hurt if it's not his becuz he talks like it is
But all I can do is pray about it . God taught me alot through this. His teachings were well worth it . I hope and pray people learn from this .
 
C

Consumed

Guest
#13
#13
Kw said:
I never said that I didn't tell my husband. I was just wondering what are the ways to get over guilt from sinful acts. It's not like I committed adultery, confessed , then I can move on with my life . Yes it is my fault, I'm not blaming God . And I did tell my husband before we were going through a divorce and now we are very happy. Its like God fixed my marriage through all of this . It's just a struggle I have with myself . I can't stand myself becuz of what I did and I'm reaping it everyday. My husband has agreed that hes the father no matter what. Yes I am so blessed ! And God is so good. We all make choices without thinking of the consequences sometimes. Sin is sin in Gods eyes whether it is murder , adultery, lust, etc . God doesn't put a title on each one nor does he depict which one is greater. It's just a self struggle , I will love the child it is a part of me but to forgive myself will take time . I fear my husband will be so hurt if it's not his becuz he talks like it is
But all I can do is pray about it . God taught me alot through this. His teachings were well worth it . I hope and pray people learn from this .
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Count your blessings kw, you have a good husband that stands by you, you are truly blessed for he could have turned hard against you but chose better in Christ. Your left with as I said earlier self condemnation which isn't coming from God in no way, He has healed your marriage, embrace His goodness and mercy sister. Condemnation is like a cancer that slowly kills steals and destroys oneself.
Martha Martha!!! Stop being Martha and just be Mary lol
 
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