What would you do

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cassiemorris

Banned
#1
Jun 24, 2012
85
1
0
#1
Hi

What would you do if you in the kitchen on your mobile talking to your friend and your dad comes along and annoys you while full well he knows your on the phone and for some reason he tells you **** you and then he elbows you out of the way.
That's what my dad has just done that to me and he is also a Christain why couldn't he just say excuse me instead of swearing at me and elbowing me out of the way. This has hurt me Just want some guidance on how to deal with it

Thanks
 
santuzza

santuzza

Senior Member
#2
Feb 12, 2013
1,609
38
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#2
I would say that you should bring him to a doctor and have his head examined because clearly he's not thinking logically.

Or is this normal behavior for him? If that is normal, I wouldn't spend any time with him. You're 33 years old, right? So, if someone treated me like that on a regular basis, I wouldn't go near him. Father or not.
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#3
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,603
113
#3
cassiemorris said:
Hi

What would you do if you in the kitchen on your mobile talking to your friend and your dad comes along and annoys you while full well he knows your on the phone and for some reason he tells you **** you and then he elbows you out of the way.
That's what my dad has just done that to me and he is also a Christain why couldn't he just say excuse me instead of swearing at me and elbowing me out of the way. This has hurt me Just want some guidance on how to deal with it

Thanks
Click to expand...


You should have said something like, "excuse me, dad, I'm on the phone right now. Could you please be quiet so I can hear"? And when he swore at you, you should have said, "Dad, I'm sorry but I don't like to hear you swear like that so please be considerate and stop it."

Tell him that he is SUPPOSEDLY a christian man and christians don't go around swearing at their daughters. Tell him it hurt your feelings to have him shove you aside and be rude and inconsiderate. Lastly, tell him he should ask forgiveness both of you AND God. He's a grown man, for goodness sake. Tell him to act like one!!
 
Pemican

Pemican

Senior Member
#4
Sep 27, 2014
954
234
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#4
I like your comments blue_ladybug but I wonder if he's beyond being lectured to.
If he does this all the time I would turn him over to God in your daily prayers.
Ask God to show him how much he is hurting you and how he should behave
towards you. Then stand back and watch how God deals with him. Be patient,
this might take time and a few hard learned lessons before he gets the message.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#5
#5
Pemican said:
I like your comments blue_ladybug but I wonder if he's beyond being lectured to.
If he does this all the time I would turn him over to God in your daily prayers.
Ask God to show him how much he is hurting you and how he should behave
towards you. Then stand back and watch how God deals with him. Be patient,
this might take time and a few hard learned lessons before he gets the message.
Click to expand...
She didn't specify that this was a repeat behavior. So to brush aside peoples advice dealing with what was said isn't the right course. It would have made more sense to first ask the OP if this kind of behavior is 'all the time' rather than correct the advice of others because you've made an assumption.
 
Joidevivre

Joidevivre

Senior Member
#6
Jul 15, 2014
3,838
271
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#6
What do you think he was really annoyed about? Have you asked him?
 
Mem

Mem

Senior Member
#7
Sep 23, 2014
6,285
1,804
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#7
I would go to him saying, "Dad, I'm sorry for ignoring you while I was on the phone, as it may have made you feel like the phone conversation was more important than acknowledging you there but that is not what I meant by it as it is impossible for us human beings to concentrate on two things at once"
 
H

Ho11y

Guest
#8
#8
I'd ask him if he want's to take this outside.
 
Joidevivre

Joidevivre

Senior Member
#9
Jul 15, 2014
3,838
271
83
#9
Another alternative idea - but you never know.

Tell whoever you are speaking to hold the line a minute, then put the phone down and hug your dad.
Watch his reaction.
 
crossnote

crossnote

Senior Member
#10
Nov 24, 2012
30,713
3,651
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#10
I would have turned around and called Tokyo, Berlin, Perth, and Mexico City...unless it was your phone.:(
 
J

JustAnotherUser

Guest
#11
#11
Ho11y said:
I'd ask him if he want's to take this outside.
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Best advice, as long as he isn't an old fashioned type of guy and has a wooden spoon or belt in his hand. :p
 
Trailblazer

Trailblazer

Senior Member
#12
Sep 8, 2014
432
30
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#12
That was rude of what your dad said and how he went about it. Elbowing you is completely out of line also.
However!... We do not know the whole story of what may have lead up to his behavior.
Is there the possibility that you have never left home, and you are living in his house for free at the age of 33?
Is there the possibility that you are not honoring the rules that he set for you living in his home?

If either one of those questions is yes. That would help discern where his heart may be at.
This by all means does not make his behavior ok on any account. But maybe some forgiveness and apologies given
on both sides would be a good thing. :)

I am not sure why my sentences keep splitting early, and then dropping to the next line. But it is aggravating. lol
 
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BelovedI

Guest
#13
#13
You shall know that weare Christians by our love. Ebowing a child is not love.
What I would do if an adult is move out and steer clear in person and pray for him until he is born again unless Holy Spirit led me to minister to him in a public place the gospel more correctly once mature enough myself, if i wasn't already to handle i lovingly towards God, myself and my parent.if not an adult seek out aholy Christian one to ask for help.
 
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cassiemorris

Banned
#14
Jun 24, 2012
85
1
0
#14
Ugly said:
She didn't specify that this was a repeat behavior. So to brush aside peoples advice dealing with what was said isn't the right course. It would have made more sense to first ask the OP if this kind of behavior is 'all the time' rather than correct the advice of others because you've made an assumption.
Click to expand...
Hi ugly his behaviour is on an off sometimes he is ok. I pay my parts with the bills but I can't afford to get house of my home but when dad retires next house will be in my name. But it like walking on egg shells my brother comes to see dad and he starts shouting at him and I've stopped going on holidays with dad because he stresses me out. While I was on the phone i was listening to what my friend had to say and dad was talking over me and showing me this big bag of sugar which could of waited till that when he swore at me i was off the phone then he elbowed me out the way so he could make a cup of tea that was it and at the time my friend was more important as she was telling me about her hospital appointment and that more important then a bag of sugar and if i said something then it would probably would of caused more problems so i normaly turn the other cheek
 
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sassylady

Guest
#15
#15
Are you in a position to move out? If so, go for it.
 
seed_time_harvest

seed_time_harvest

Senior Member
#17
Dec 9, 2011
13,813
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#17
Mem said:
I would go to him saying, "Dad, I'm sorry for ignoring you while I was on the phone, as it may have made you feel like the phone conversation was more important than acknowledging you there but that is not what I meant by it as it is impossible for us human beings to concentrate on two things at once"
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I like what you said.
 
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