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that's not true. your attacker FORCED himself on you.
It may be different if you were promised to him by your male guardian.
But honestly, your body was taken from you, against your will.
You have the right to marry whomever you choose, when you commit to each other. How can you commit to someone who has already destroyed everything that marriage stands for?
It is the classic sin of men to take what we want by force. And the classic of women to withold from a man.
But that said, it is different within marriage.
You did not commit to this man, your attacker. nor him to you. And you said this happened as a child. You probably weren't even old enough to understand what was happening to you.
You need feel no shame. You have done no wrong here and the guilt isn't yours to bear.
I promise you, if it comes the day after we die, I'll stand in front of God and take the blame and punishment for you.
But honestly, I do not believe, with all my heart, that there willl be any waiting for you.
You were abused. Isn't a husband commanded to love his wife?
Let's say, even for arguments sake, that your attacker 'owns' you. Hasn't he already violated the marriage due to what he has done to you?
The commandment is not to refuse another person their marriage right. ie sex.
But that does not mean that it is okay to take it forcefully.
Jesus gives reasons for divorce. I think you should read them.
The marriage oblication is that a man is 'faithful' to his wife, and wife to her husband.
That faith, in English, denotes not cheating. But faith is more than that.
Violence toward a wife is certainly grounds for the bond to be broken. The minute that line is crossed, the man has already broken his oath to the woman. The marriage is defiled.
it can only be undefiled through her forgiveness and him changing.
But you and this man were never married in the first place.
His was an act of violence against you. It does not matter about the ins and outs of it. Whether he took your 'virginity' or not.
Think of it simply as that he has hit you. Struck you. Hurt you. Taken you against your will.
The simple matter is, the passage you refer to infers that the man who has done what he has done to you, must repay his sin somehow, and follow it up with commitment to change and to treat you properly.
And it would be wrong in God's eyes for him to divorce you. In essence, He owes you his life.
In the times of the old testament, the man always provided for the woman. So in essence, he is bound to provide and care for you for the rest of your life because of what he has done.
And NEVER allowed to divorce you.
However, that does not mean that YOU have to accept this offer.
You are speaking of Dueteronomy, aren't you?
It may be different if you were promised to him by your male guardian.
But honestly, your body was taken from you, against your will.
You have the right to marry whomever you choose, when you commit to each other. How can you commit to someone who has already destroyed everything that marriage stands for?
It is the classic sin of men to take what we want by force. And the classic of women to withold from a man.
But that said, it is different within marriage.
You did not commit to this man, your attacker. nor him to you. And you said this happened as a child. You probably weren't even old enough to understand what was happening to you.
You need feel no shame. You have done no wrong here and the guilt isn't yours to bear.
I promise you, if it comes the day after we die, I'll stand in front of God and take the blame and punishment for you.
But honestly, I do not believe, with all my heart, that there willl be any waiting for you.
You were abused. Isn't a husband commanded to love his wife?
Let's say, even for arguments sake, that your attacker 'owns' you. Hasn't he already violated the marriage due to what he has done to you?
The commandment is not to refuse another person their marriage right. ie sex.
But that does not mean that it is okay to take it forcefully.
Jesus gives reasons for divorce. I think you should read them.
The marriage oblication is that a man is 'faithful' to his wife, and wife to her husband.
That faith, in English, denotes not cheating. But faith is more than that.
Violence toward a wife is certainly grounds for the bond to be broken. The minute that line is crossed, the man has already broken his oath to the woman. The marriage is defiled.
it can only be undefiled through her forgiveness and him changing.
But you and this man were never married in the first place.
His was an act of violence against you. It does not matter about the ins and outs of it. Whether he took your 'virginity' or not.
Think of it simply as that he has hit you. Struck you. Hurt you. Taken you against your will.
The simple matter is, the passage you refer to infers that the man who has done what he has done to you, must repay his sin somehow, and follow it up with commitment to change and to treat you properly.
And it would be wrong in God's eyes for him to divorce you. In essence, He owes you his life.
In the times of the old testament, the man always provided for the woman. So in essence, he is bound to provide and care for you for the rest of your life because of what he has done.
And NEVER allowed to divorce you.
However, that does not mean that YOU have to accept this offer.
You are speaking of Dueteronomy, aren't you?
The verse basically says, if a man violates a woman, it's his duty to offer her care for the rest of his (or her) life.
People easily misconstrue it to mean that a woman has to marry her rapist. This isn't the case.
it's more like God saying 'Rape a woman will you? If you commit such a disgusting act, you will owe her your wages and your house, to look after her and shelter her for all the days of your life'.
But under no circumstances does the woman need accept. It was just that back in those days, the woman would be looked upon as a rape victim. And as harsh as it is, many men wouldn't consider her good to be a wife.
But times have changed. And men aren't necessarily as hard-hearted as that.
People easily misconstrue it to mean that a woman has to marry her rapist. This isn't the case.
it's more like God saying 'Rape a woman will you? If you commit such a disgusting act, you will owe her your wages and your house, to look after her and shelter her for all the days of your life'.
But under no circumstances does the woman need accept. It was just that back in those days, the woman would be looked upon as a rape victim. And as harsh as it is, many men wouldn't consider her good to be a wife.
But times have changed. And men aren't necessarily as hard-hearted as that.
G
My dear child, do not let anyone tell you God hates you. God has never hated you. God has loved each and every person who has ever lived.
God would never ask or command you to marry a man who has harmed you. NEVER!
As a child being taken by force of another has no bearing on you. Did you willingly lie with the man that raped you? I would sure hope not or else it is not rape.
The man that raped you he commited the sin he brought harm upon you.
Rape has never been and never will be the the sin of the one being taken against there will.
Please let me show you what God has to say about such a person that would harm a child.
Matthew 18:6 (KJV)
6 But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.
Mark 9:42 (KJV)
42 And whosoever shall offend one of these little ones that believe in me, it is better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he were cast into the sea.
Luke 17:1-2 (KJV)
1 Then said he unto the disciples, It is impossible but that offences will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come!
2 It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.
God makes it very clear this man would be better off drowned in the depth of the sea, than to harm (offend) a child.
My dear child, my heart breaks for you. Please know God loves you and wants you to be with him for ever in has glorious kingdom.
Turn your heart to the LORD and let him lead you in his truth and righteousness.
Jesus is call you dear child. Don't keep him waiting. Go to him now. He loves you.
Do you have Christian woman you can fellowship with and study with? Fill your life with Christian fellowship. There is great support and strength to be found in praying and studying with other Christians.
Jesus can heal you if you seak his healing and believe he has already healed you the moment you ask him, without doubt.
I will keep you in my prayers smith.
A brother in the love of Christ.
God would never ask or command you to marry a man who has harmed you. NEVER!
As a child being taken by force of another has no bearing on you. Did you willingly lie with the man that raped you? I would sure hope not or else it is not rape.
The man that raped you he commited the sin he brought harm upon you.
Rape has never been and never will be the the sin of the one being taken against there will.
Please let me show you what God has to say about such a person that would harm a child.
Matthew 18:6 (KJV)
6 But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.
Mark 9:42 (KJV)
42 And whosoever shall offend one of these little ones that believe in me, it is better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he were cast into the sea.
Luke 17:1-2 (KJV)
1 Then said he unto the disciples, It is impossible but that offences will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come!
2 It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.
God makes it very clear this man would be better off drowned in the depth of the sea, than to harm (offend) a child.
My dear child, my heart breaks for you. Please know God loves you and wants you to be with him for ever in has glorious kingdom.
Turn your heart to the LORD and let him lead you in his truth and righteousness.
Jesus is call you dear child. Don't keep him waiting. Go to him now. He loves you.
Do you have Christian woman you can fellowship with and study with? Fill your life with Christian fellowship. There is great support and strength to be found in praying and studying with other Christians.
Jesus can heal you if you seak his healing and believe he has already healed you the moment you ask him, without doubt.
I will keep you in my prayers smith.
A brother in the love of Christ.
G
Smith my dear child:
There is no law in the Bible stating that a woman must marry here attacker. No place in scripture says a persons life and purity is only worth so much money.
There is only one value ever put upon the life of another in scripture. Jesus showed us what our life is worth by his death upon the cross.
God himself died upon the cross for you and for me. No man or woman can put a price on the life of another. We are priceless. The death of Jesus on the cross proves we are priceless.
There is no law in the Bible stating that a woman must marry here attacker. No place in scripture says a persons life and purity is only worth so much money.
There is only one value ever put upon the life of another in scripture. Jesus showed us what our life is worth by his death upon the cross.
God himself died upon the cross for you and for me. No man or woman can put a price on the life of another. We are priceless. The death of Jesus on the cross proves we are priceless.
N
[size=+1] You can make it through this through Christ forgiveness, hang in there.......God said if a man find a women and rape her, then the person that raped is suppose to be put to death. You are not suppose to marry him. There is no sin in the victim it says that clear in the Bible. You did not sin , there is nothing wrong with you. Only the criminal . Plus there is no sin you committed. And if you did Christ can forgive that if you repent. But in this matter,. you did nothing wrong. So some one lied to you. Or you been thinking wrong all this time about God's take on this.[/size]
[size=+2]Deuteronomy 22:
[25] But if a man find a betrothed damsel in the field, and the man force her, and lie with her: then the man only that lay with her shall die:
[26] But unto the damsel thou shalt do nothing; there is in the damsel no sin worthy of death: for as when a man riseth against his neighbour, and slayeth him, even so is this matter:
It gos on to say, if a man find a woman and she is not married, '' and dose Not force her' and they both are together, because she was not married then there is a price to be paid because of a custom at that time. But because it just said if a man find and rape some one to put the rapist to death. This would be the same if he forced her in the following verses he would have to be put to death under God's commandment. If you went about trying to marry your rapist then you would be in the wrong.[/size][size=+1]forgive in that sense maybe it can help you to move pass what happened. Though I wish they put that guy to death as per God's command.[/size]
[size=+2]Deuteronomy 22:
[25] But if a man find a betrothed damsel in the field, and the man force her, and lie with her: then the man only that lay with her shall die:
[26] But unto the damsel thou shalt do nothing; there is in the damsel no sin worthy of death: for as when a man riseth against his neighbour, and slayeth him, even so is this matter:
It gos on to say, if a man find a woman and she is not married, '' and dose Not force her' and they both are together, because she was not married then there is a price to be paid because of a custom at that time. But because it just said if a man find and rape some one to put the rapist to death. This would be the same if he forced her in the following verses he would have to be put to death under God's commandment. If you went about trying to marry your rapist then you would be in the wrong.[/size][size=+1]forgive in that sense maybe it can help you to move pass what happened. Though I wish they put that guy to death as per God's command.[/size]
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God is not going to hold you accountable for something that happened to you beyond your control, you were raped, not only raped, but molested being a chold, you have done NOTHING wrong, and you certainly dont have to marry the attacker, you cant commit a sin in which you have no choice. If anything pray for the attacket to find salvation, he's on a wide road to hell being the way he is,
S
This is why God gives us prayer warriors, & you shall feel his healing covering.God bless you gods child, .head. the advice you have been reading here, God is already answering, & trying to open your wounds to his unique healing....again bless you, & yes by all means talk to your fiance, start your real marriage in truth.none of this is your fault, care about yourself & except gods free gifts of advice, exceptence comfort & growth. I have heard you & I love you & will keep you in my prayers.
God has wiped your body completely, absolutely clean of that rape, you need never think of it again, but forget what is past and go on to the future God is preparing for you. That is what Paul tells us he did, and it is even more so for you because you are a defenseless woman who has been wronged.
You simply need to meet your Heavenly Father in all of scripture from Genesis to Revelation and through the HS that He gives you. When you truly meet him, personally, you will know all of God (the three in one) is only of love, we are His children. God wants you protected and cared for. God operates in our world by principles, and one of the basic principles is that He protects His own. When you were raped, all of the forces of heaven were drawn to help you recover. Any time scripture tells of any defenseless woman that was abused, God went to help them. Take a concordance and look up every reference to widow, for instance. That is the way God operates. Now look at the forgiveness through Christ we are given.
You simply need to meet your Heavenly Father in all of scripture from Genesis to Revelation and through the HS that He gives you. When you truly meet him, personally, you will know all of God (the three in one) is only of love, we are His children. God wants you protected and cared for. God operates in our world by principles, and one of the basic principles is that He protects His own. When you were raped, all of the forces of heaven were drawn to help you recover. Any time scripture tells of any defenseless woman that was abused, God went to help them. Take a concordance and look up every reference to widow, for instance. That is the way God operates. Now look at the forgiveness through Christ we are given.
.If you are under the NT, you would have quite a time not being under the OT any more, for Christ said He came to fulfill and not a bit of it would be done away with.
The entire book of Hebrews talks about building on the OT and not getting rid of any of it. How can you know Christ if you refuse the Father? Christ said He and the Father were one.
The entire book of Hebrews talks about building on the OT and not getting rid of any of it. How can you know Christ if you refuse the Father? Christ said He and the Father were one.
P
little one, we must never, ever look at our circumstances to determine God's attitude toward us.
terrible things happen in this sinful, fallen world.
that's not even remotely connected to the will of God, or the love of God.
those laws regarding the victims of sexual abuse were to protect the woman, do you see?
and if you are in Christ, you are not under those laws.
all things are new!
i encourage you to seek the Lord.
i believe He is wooing you, drawing you, calling you.
do you believe that Jesus Christ can save a person from their sin?
if you had your handbag stolen, would you hold yourself responsible?
if your home was broken into, and all your stuff taken, would it be your fault?
do you think the Righteous, Holy God has standards lower than ours?
of course, there is sin in your life (and in mine). (not the rape, little one, that was not your crime )
but the questions you should be asking are things like this...
is Jesus real?
is the Bible His Word?
does He mean what He says?
He says, 'if you confess with your mouth, 'Jesus is Lord', and believe in your heart God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.' (Rom. 10:9)
do you believe He means this?
love,
ellie
terrible things happen in this sinful, fallen world.
that's not even remotely connected to the will of God, or the love of God.
those laws regarding the victims of sexual abuse were to protect the woman, do you see?
and if you are in Christ, you are not under those laws.
all things are new!
i encourage you to seek the Lord.
i believe He is wooing you, drawing you, calling you.
do you believe that Jesus Christ can save a person from their sin?
if you had your handbag stolen, would you hold yourself responsible?
if your home was broken into, and all your stuff taken, would it be your fault?
do you think the Righteous, Holy God has standards lower than ours?
of course, there is sin in your life (and in mine). (not the rape, little one, that was not your crime
)but the questions you should be asking are things like this...
is Jesus real?
is the Bible His Word?
does He mean what He says?
He says, 'if you confess with your mouth, 'Jesus is Lord', and believe in your heart God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.' (Rom. 10:9)
do you believe He means this?
love,
ellie