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G
If a newly-married couple come together with the right mix of love, respect, understanding, etc. -- and -- having the only expectation that - "together, we will make it 'better and better' as we go" -- 'listening and learning' from each other - and enjoying the experience of it --- nothing will be 'at risk'... 
C
********************cough cough**********************
yeah, from what I hear, I'd rather be riding shotgun in Battgirl's Mustang if that which tends to hit the fan were to do so, but I acknowledge that there are some bad and good drivers of both genders.
Shouryu, would you pass him some sauce. That foot looks a little dry, but I get the feeling he may need to choke it all down anyway.
J
"You know, these male / female threads inevitably always come in pairs..."
I did not want to derail the 'mate' thread to this one, 'From woman to men'.
So...
Whether serious or humorous -- men - give your best advice to women...
~ THE absolute best thing you can do to destroy your relationship with a man is "play games" / "toy" with him.
Sincere honesty and straight-forwardness is the best way to deal with a man.
~ If a woman asks the question:
"Does this make me look fat?"
Then - assuming that she is a sincere, honest, and loving woman - she really and truly wants an honest answer.
And, she should get one.
And then, she should be able to "handle" the answer -- knowing that her man loves her - and would not so much as want to hurt her feelings - but is giving her the honest answer that she has requested.
Otherwise -- she is not a sincere, honest, and loving woman.
It is as simple as that.
It is entirely ridiculous for a person to "push aside and forget" the total depth and extent of love and caring in a relationship over the answer to such a silly and needless question as this.
Men -- if a woman asks you this question - and she is not actually wanting a sincere and honest answer -- she is "playing games" with you - or herself - or both...
"O.K. -- quick - someone post something funny..."
I did not want to derail the 'mate' thread to this one, 'From woman to men'.
So...
Whether serious or humorous -- men - give your best advice to women...
~ THE absolute best thing you can do to destroy your relationship with a man is "play games" / "toy" with him.
Sincere honesty and straight-forwardness is the best way to deal with a man.
~ If a woman asks the question:
"Does this make me look fat?"
Then - assuming that she is a sincere, honest, and loving woman - she really and truly wants an honest answer.
And, she should get one.
And then, she should be able to "handle" the answer -- knowing that her man loves her - and would not so much as want to hurt her feelings - but is giving her the honest answer that she has requested.
Otherwise -- she is not a sincere, honest, and loving woman.
It is as simple as that.
It is entirely ridiculous for a person to "push aside and forget" the total depth and extent of love and caring in a relationship over the answer to such a silly and needless question as this.
Men -- if a woman asks you this question - and she is not actually wanting a sincere and honest answer -- she is "playing games" with you - or herself - or both...
"O.K. -- quick - someone post something funny..."
your mention that someone could be playing games with themselves...that clarifies what I've seen folks do in my life in the past, me too perhaps. I had never looked at it that way...
thanks for awakening me to something Gary.
your mention that someone could be playing games with themselves...that clarifies what I've seen folks do in my life in the past, me too perhaps. I had never looked at it that way...
your mention that someone could be playing games with themselves...that clarifies what I've seen folks do in my life in the past, me too perhaps. I had never looked at it that way...
Ok, but some men play games too. I have been unable to get a straight honest answer from some men too. I think they would qualify in playing a game with themselves.
C
Ladies,
Remember that you bring us the story of your day and simply want us to hear and and validate it (which we should honor). It is however, our natural tendency to hear the story of your day and listen intently to find what in there it is that you want us to fix, seize on that thing, and not hear the rest because we are trying to FIX something.
Fellas,
When she talks, put down the tools, look at her, and know that when she is done, you can pick up the tools and fix something that isn't her day. Listen, validate, and express compassion. When it's all said and done, you might get some homemade desert of one sort or another before the week is out.
Remember that you bring us the story of your day and simply want us to hear and and validate it (which we should honor). It is however, our natural tendency to hear the story of your day and listen intently to find what in there it is that you want us to fix, seize on that thing, and not hear the rest because we are trying to FIX something.
Fellas,
When she talks, put down the tools, look at her, and know that when she is done, you can pick up the tools and fix something that isn't her day. Listen, validate, and express compassion. When it's all said and done, you might get some homemade desert of one sort or another before the week is out.
Ladies: You know how sometimes you don't want us to fix the problem, you just want us to hold you for a while? Sometimes we feel that way too. Asking how our day went is fine, but if you get an answer which indicates the day was rough, bad, hard or generally ungood, please don't keep pecking at us for details. We'll probably tell you more than you want to know before the day is out anyway, but when we get home and collapse on the sofa we just need to rest for a while. We're trying not to snap at you because we know the rough day was not your fault and you don't deserve the backlash.
U
The bible does say a man and a woman (not women) come together as one flesh. While the bible may never outright speak against polygamy, the NT does not show it's approval of the practice. And all references to marriage include 2 people, not more.
[h=1]Mark 10:8[/h] [SUP]8 [/SUP]and the two will become one flesh.’[SUP][a][/SUP] So they are no longer two, but one flesh.
Matthew 19:5
And he said, 'This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.'
[h=1]Mark 10:8[/h] [SUP]8 [/SUP]and the two will become one flesh.’[SUP][a][/SUP] So they are no longer two, but one flesh.
Matthew 19:5
And he said, 'This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.'
Well that can't be a reason/excuse for men who live in countries with different health care systems though
Advice for women...
Don't be a feminist, Christian men and even secular men hate it. For good reason too. Feminism promotes ungodly things such as husbands not being the leader of the family, promiscuity, lesbianism, and women NOT being focused on family and the home which is what a proverbs woman embodies. (Proverbs 31)
Next thing, don't be politically liberal. I don't think I need to explain much about liberalism, it also promotes ungodly things which includes feminism.
Avoid those two things because they are ungodly. Your not doing yourself any favors being associated with these garbage and sinful philosophies. Be Godly, modest, and home/family oriented women. Be a proverbs 31 women.
Study God's word... remember that God is not just a God of love but a God of justice. This means he will judge sinful people someday and punish them for their wickedness. Too often when I speak to Christian women they believe that God is only love when in fact he is also a judge. This a real side to God which I think Christian women seem to either shy away from or just don't like talking about it. David fought and killed Goliath... Jesus flipped tables and whipped thieves... Paul the Apostle rebuked...and God will certainly send people to hell. Its clear that we must learn to understand how to practice good judgement and justice sometimes. Good judgment will protect you and your family.
Also, learn to be home-makers right now so that when you get married you'll be able to serve your family as mothers and wives. Get into children's ministry, get experience with kids (its great for men as-well for that matter)... we need great Christian moms to raise our kids well. Also, learn how to cook.
God Bless
Don't be a feminist, Christian men and even secular men hate it. For good reason too. Feminism promotes ungodly things such as husbands not being the leader of the family, promiscuity, lesbianism, and women NOT being focused on family and the home which is what a proverbs woman embodies. (Proverbs 31)
Next thing, don't be politically liberal. I don't think I need to explain much about liberalism, it also promotes ungodly things which includes feminism.
Avoid those two things because they are ungodly. Your not doing yourself any favors being associated with these garbage and sinful philosophies. Be Godly, modest, and home/family oriented women. Be a proverbs 31 women.
Study God's word... remember that God is not just a God of love but a God of justice. This means he will judge sinful people someday and punish them for their wickedness. Too often when I speak to Christian women they believe that God is only love when in fact he is also a judge. This a real side to God which I think Christian women seem to either shy away from or just don't like talking about it. David fought and killed Goliath... Jesus flipped tables and whipped thieves... Paul the Apostle rebuked...and God will certainly send people to hell. Its clear that we must learn to understand how to practice good judgement and justice sometimes. Good judgment will protect you and your family.
Also, learn to be home-makers right now so that when you get married you'll be able to serve your family as mothers and wives. Get into children's ministry, get experience with kids (its great for men as-well for that matter)... we need great Christian moms to raise our kids well. Also, learn how to cook.
God Bless
S
Unless, of course, you marry a man who does not desire children at all, and therefore does not expect you to camp out at home. In fact, if you dislike children as much as he does, that might even a bonus!
And unless, of course, you marry a man who happens to be a pretty awesome cook, and would rather cook for you, rather than you for him. Because cooking is so clearly a feminine skill that MUST be performed by a woman that the vast majority of executive chefs in restaurants in the world today are women. Oh wait, they're not? Most executive chefs are men? Oh. Hmmm.
tl;dr
Not EVERY Christian man wants what Calmador wants in his last paragraph. ^_^
And unless, of course, you marry a man who happens to be a pretty awesome cook, and would rather cook for you, rather than you for him. Because cooking is so clearly a feminine skill that MUST be performed by a woman that the vast majority of executive chefs in restaurants in the world today are women. Oh wait, they're not? Most executive chefs are men? Oh. Hmmm.
tl;dr
Not EVERY Christian man wants what Calmador wants in his last paragraph. ^_^
Soooooooooo totally true. Hear him ladies! Be a Proverbs 31 woman!
- Be worthy of your husband's trust (v:11)
- Learn sewing and knitting (v:13)
- Be the bread-winner (also, please try to be a merchant ship) (v:14)
- Learn farming (v:16)
- Keep only the candle burning in the night and not your night-lamp (v:18)
- Make clothes out of scarlet for your entire home (v:21)
- Wear only silk and purple for all occasions and for all seasons (v:22)
- Marry a husband who is a gate-keeper (v:23)
- Be a linen and belt seller (v:24)
If you don't do any of this, then you are clearly disobeying God's Word.
My advice to women:
Hey, why would I be giving advice to a woman?
I don't know the first thing about being a woman.
What, I'm gonna tell them how to walk in high heels,
or put on lipstick, or always go to the bathroom in groups like a herd of sheep?
What advice could I possibly give to a woman?
I don't understand them AT ALL.
NOT AT ALL.
I mean, well... I do like it when they smell pretty.
But that's all I've got.
Yeah.
That's all I've got.
: )
Hey, why would I be giving advice to a woman?
I don't know the first thing about being a woman.
What, I'm gonna tell them how to walk in high heels,
or put on lipstick, or always go to the bathroom in groups like a herd of sheep?
What advice could I possibly give to a woman?
I don't understand them AT ALL.
NOT AT ALL.
I mean, well... I do like it when they smell pretty.
But that's all I've got.
Yeah.
That's all I've got.
: )
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G
Nonetheless --- it is what God wants...
And that is the real issue.
There is nothing wrong with a husband helping his wife cook, clean, etc. ( And perhaps he should, at times, to help his wife - because he loves her. ); however, it is God-ordained that the woman be the 'home-maker'.
In general - I would say that - any "arrangement" that is agreeable between husband and wife - is probably O.K. -- except that they should not depart from the intent that God desires for each role in the family.
And that is the real issue.
There is nothing wrong with a husband helping his wife cook, clean, etc. ( And perhaps he should, at times, to help his wife - because he loves her. ); however, it is God-ordained that the woman be the 'home-maker'.
In general - I would say that - any "arrangement" that is agreeable between husband and wife - is probably O.K. -- except that they should not depart from the intent that God desires for each role in the family.
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G
Soooooooooo totally true. Hear him ladies! Be a Proverbs 31 woman!
- Be worthy of your husband's trust (v:11)
- Learn sewing and knitting (v:13)
- Be the bread-winner (also, please try to be a merchant ship) (v:14)
- Learn farming (v:16)
- Keep only the candle burning in the night and not your night-lamp (v:18)
- Make clothes out of scarlet for your entire home (v:21)
- Wear only silk and purple for all occasions and for all seasons (v:22)
- Marry a husband who is a gate-keeper (v:23)
- Be a linen and belt seller (v:24)
If you don't do any of this, then you are clearly disobeying God's Word.
- Be worthy of your husband's trust (v:11)
- Learn sewing and knitting (v:13)
- Be the bread-winner (also, please try to be a merchant ship) (v:14)
- Learn farming (v:16)
- Keep only the candle burning in the night and not your night-lamp (v:18)
- Make clothes out of scarlet for your entire home (v:21)
- Wear only silk and purple for all occasions and for all seasons (v:22)
- Marry a husband who is a gate-keeper (v:23)
- Be a linen and belt seller (v:24)
If you don't do any of this, then you are clearly disobeying God's Word.
[SUP]Proverbs31: 27 [/SUP]She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Overall proverbs 31 shows a woman who at heart is a homemaker. Verse 27 exemplifies this. Granted, not every Christian man or woman wants to be a homemaker but this is how a Godly wife is shown in the bible.
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Overall proverbs 31 shows a woman who at heart is a homemaker. Verse 27 exemplifies this. Granted, not every Christian man or woman wants to be a homemaker but this is how a Godly wife is shown in the bible.