Skin Hunger - The real cause of my lonelness...

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Jordache

Guest
#21
#21
I am a hugger. I could hug the same person 100 times and then hug them 100 times more. A need for physical touch is real, but if you are solely looking for a touch from women, then that may be something you should be careful of. I know it has been dangerous for me, and I've had to be very careful about it.
Do a little research, and if you really want the massage, you can afford it. If you are working, you just have to budget. I started getting massages and they were awesome. They were expensive, but when I made them a priority I made myself afford them.
 
dothackzero

dothackzero

Banned
#22
May 4, 2009
1,534
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#22
BarlyGurl said:
No Doth... what you really need is to do some growing up in your faith. A massage would sure be beneficial for you... bu just a band-aid to the underlying problem... spiritual immaturity... which is NOT a crime or sin and resolvable with time.
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Not really, this was the answer I got when I was asking God for help with the loneliness.

Jordache said:
I am a hugger. I could hug the same person 100 times and then hug them 100 times more. A need for physical touch is real, but if you are solely looking for a touch from women, then that may be something you should be careful of. I know it has been dangerous for me, and I've had to be very careful about it.
Do a little research, and if you really want the massage, you can afford it. If you are working, you just have to budget. I started getting massages and they were awesome. They were expensive, but when I made them a priority I made myself afford them.
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I don't have a problem with getting in touch with guys(Now that I know that this is the problem), But I do want to feel around and accepted by the girls around me.
 
dothackzero

dothackzero

Banned
#23
May 4, 2009
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#23
and I just failed another internship call...
 
Ritter

Ritter

Banned
#24
Jul 25, 2005
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#24
Another thought. Sometimes in life, God deprives us of things we either desire or depend on in order to stretch us. Perhaps you are being drawn from the physical to the metaphysical.
 
Ritter

Ritter

Banned
#25
Jul 25, 2005
2,417
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#25
dothackzero said:
and I just failed another internship call...
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Off topic. Do you want our help or our pity?

This seems to be less about "skin hunger" and more about "woe is dothack."

You seem like a nice guy. I'm not going to recant any of the compliments I've ever paid you. However, there comes a time in life in which you just have to buck up and take the bull by the horns.

Until you are ready to stand up and defy the odds without need to elicit feelings of sorrow for you in others, you will not command respect. If you do not command respect, then the failed internship calls, rejection on the part of women, and subtle ridicule on sites such as this will continue.

A journey begins with a single step; a lifestyle change starts with a new attitude. For my part I'm through feeling sorry for you until I see evidence that your chin is up and that you are ready to bless others instead of trying to drag everyone down into your house of self-loathing.

I only say this because I think you can do it. Otherwise I wouldn't bother posting at all.
 
B

BarlyGurl

Guest
#26
#26
Ritter said:
Off topic. Do you want our help or our pity?
However, there comes a time in life in which you just have to buck up and take the bull by the horns.


Come on Doth... start small
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dothackzero

dothackzero

Banned
#27
May 4, 2009
1,534
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#27
Ritter said:
Off topic. Do you want our help or our pity?
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Help is what I need, though I apprently do want pity when I'm depressed. :p And I'll probably find the money to get a massage. Though it won't be right now, had a car accident(I owe $500) and I just bought a box of Magic cards.
 
H

Hellooo

Guest
#28
#28
Dock, you're always going to be disappointed if you seek happiness and acceptance in other people.
Be the kind of friend you'd like others to be towards you; if you're strongly desiring a wife; work on being a good husband; if you want better employment, keep updating your skills and applying. Be an active participant in your own life, things don't change if you don't make changes.
:)
 
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Tintin

Guest
#29
#29
I don't know what to say. My main love language is physical touch and things like hugs from family and friends do wonders to help with my general health and well-being. I love to hug and be hugged but I always ask before initiating and I've never hugged anyone I'm interested in. It does get difficult because my family and friends aren't always around, especially when I was teaching interstate. I've never before had a girlfriend and in my early 20's that really bothered me because my friends and peers were finding their special guy/girl, getting engaged and married. Since then, I still get lonely every now and then but I've grown in my spiritual maturity and have learned to better accept my identity in Christ. Dot, I suggest you do likewise. No-ones likes someone that mops around all the time and complains about this and that. If that's all people know you for, how are they expected to feel drawn to you (for friendship or a relationship?) Surrender your desires to God and He will lead you in His Will for you.
 
N

Nike

Guest
#30
#30
uh.. we don't hug in my church, and my family is not the huggy kissy type either.. I grew up fine.. :p
I think the problem might be if someone is satisfied with one's life..
God satisfies our soul, and I believe that's enough :) ----> not saying that solitary is ok, though..
 
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Powemm

Guest
#31
#31
Read up on love in the bible --- let god touch you...
Loneliness are signs of depravity seeping in ... Continually fill yourself with His word ... when doing this .. Spending more time with God .. Loneliness leaves ... just from my own experience this is what I have found ... God does a body good!
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
#32
#32
dothackzero said:
Help is what I need, though I apprently do want pity when I'm depressed. :p And I'll probably find the money to get a massage. Though it won't be right now, had a car accident(I owe $500) and I just bought a box of Magic cards.
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Why not some embracing understanding of he who saved you, whom you accepted the ways,of, the work.toward going the way toward, why is 'Magic' good for you, dohackbuddy?

that's the thing, and the Lord leads but feeling sorry for self is a sign of your not embracing God's plan.
Im not going to say Magic card game is bad, but, is that game of cards growing you, building you up or is it a house of cards that collapses your faith and keeps His Spitit in you from acting on things because you are valuing 'magic' and massages more than listening to what 'games' He wants you to play?
 
dothackzero

dothackzero

Banned
#33
May 4, 2009
1,534
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#33
GreenNnice said:
Why not some embracing understanding of he who saved you, whom you accepted the ways,of, the work.toward going the way toward, why is 'Magic' good for you, dohackbuddy?

that's the thing, and the Lord leads but feeling sorry for self is a sign of your not embracing God's plan.
Im not going to say Magic card game is bad, but, is that game of cards growing you, building you up or is it a house of cards that collapses your faith and keeps His Spitit in you from acting on things because you are valuing 'magic' and massages more than listening to what 'games' He wants you to play?
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I play it because it's good fellowship time between me and my friends(all Christian).
 
G

GreenNnice

Guest
#34
#34
Jordache said:
I am a hugger. I could hug the same person 100 times and then hug them 100 times more. A need for physical touch is real, but if you are solely looking for a touch from women, then that may be something you should be careful of. I know it has been dangerous for me, and I've had to be very careful about it.
Do a little research, and if you really want the massage, you can afford it. If you are working, you just have to budget. I started getting massages and they were awesome. They were expensive, but when I made them a priority I made myself afford them.
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I can only assume your dog is very well taken care of, Jordy :)

dothackzero said:
I play it because it's good fellowship time between me and my friends(all Christian).
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Then good, dothackbuddy, you keep following Him, His grace, and, remember, you are working toward doing something, I see that :) , others do, too, good advice from others , like helllooo , and , just keep on keeping on, you go after another internship, you just keep on keeping on plugging away, PRAY DAILY and go forward. I TELL YOU THE TRUTH, you will be at peace IF you just live in His grace. Again, I was NOT saying Magic is bad card game for you, I saying that it COULD be negative IF you are not able to draw positives from those in that circle.

I pray you can find strength and friendship, maybe even, connections, from someone in that Magic circle, as playing games with Christians is good, and His ways are not my ways for you nor are my thoughts His thoughts for you as Isaiah 55 ? says . Keep on keeping on, God bless ya,dot brother !! :)
 
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Powemm

Guest
#35
#35
Hey doth- Sometimes a different way to look at this subject (lust) helps... There are two sides in each of us. (flesh/spirit)
the flesh desires to lust after things that will feed it ..
This is where we choose to man our gates ( what we watch, what we look at, what we listen to , where we go, who who we surround ourselves with )
So in this, we can either "feed" things the flesh man desires or starve him by not feeding his appetite... Make sense?
we all have this two sided nature ...and we all struggle with it.. Every single one of us!
if I engage in conversation that fuels this side of me (flesh). Look at things that fuels it, listen to things that fuel it ... All it's going to take is a match to start an out of control blaze....
I look at my flesh nature like a pet in a cage.... I have control of it , it doesn't have control of me ... I choose to feed and wake it or starve it and keep it in submission). I know if I am "drawn" to something or someone, I must look quickly and carefully to see if that thing or person is feeding or fueling this beast....
It's a great indicator the beast is waking up... And as far as I'm concerned ? This beast is in submission to me ... I say weather or not it's to be woken up or staved to death... perhaps a different perspective will help ... I know it sure helps me...
I'm glad your talking about this ... Sin likes to hide ... and I prefer to keep a very bright light on it ... There is nothing good in the flesh in any of us ... it is hungry for all the wrong things ..... sometimes an owner doesn't know it's pet is on the loose (lust can turn to a beast in a quick minute ) and those who do not have a handle on their beast loose control of it... It can even end up right at our feet, like a stray dog.... integrity is not stealing or taking advantage of what someone else has lost.... Integrity is retrieving without handling and giving it back to the rightful owner ...letting them keep what God says is valuable... Simply put ... Someone comes to you with lustful temptation ( flirting ,hugs, talking, whatever feeds your flesh nature ) and lays it at your feet.?.. Be aware of what is happening ... Be sober minded in the spirit ... help them stand up like the warrior you are and tell them to keep what they are trying to give away for free .... You're soul is better than that ... and will be better for it ..

peace in Christ brother ...
Michelle
 
dothackzero

dothackzero

Banned
#36
May 4, 2009
1,534
6
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#36
So yeah, I'm gonna try asking one of the girls from chruch to hang out. I kinda had my eye on her for a little while, but seems like now's the time make a move and hopefully be able to get know her better. btw, this was one of the girls I hugged from a few days ago(1st time too). I just hope the hug was because she too tired to think since she just got back from a missions trip.(Basically it was 4:30AM in her mind when it happened.)
 
AAAPlus

AAAPlus

Senior Member
#37
Aug 2, 2011
601
10
18
#37
Dot...post an ad on craigslist asking for hugs. I'm pretty sure there are lots of folks out there who are willing to give hugs to a young guy who's feeling down. Or post an ad saying you'll trade some of your skills for a massage. You could offer to do programming for someone or clean their house or wash their car...etc in exchange for one. There's bound to be folks who want to make a trade.

Just watch out for creepos.
 
dothackzero

dothackzero

Banned
#38
May 4, 2009
1,534
6
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#38
dothackzero said:
So yeah, I'm gonna try asking one of the girls from chruch to hang out. I kinda had my eye on her for a little while, but seems like now's the time make a move and hopefully be able to get know her better. btw, this was one of the girls I hugged from a few days ago(1st time too). I just hope the hug was because she too tired to think since she just got back from a missions trip.(Basically it was 4:30AM in her mind when it happened.)
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Any advice/tips for asking her to hang out?
 
Searching4Truth

Searching4Truth

Senior Member
#39
Jul 25, 2012
1,904
24
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#39
Why don't you just be straight up about it and ask if she wants to hang out? It's not like you're asking her to have sex or anything. If it's as simple and as innocent as you make it out to be, then why should their be any complications to the matter?
 
T

Tintin

Guest
#40
#40
My goodness, dot! You analyse relationships more than most girls!
 
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