Why are women so concerned with External Appearances?

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Liamson

Liamson

Senior Member
#1
Feb 3, 2010
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I'm not talking about Dimensions, Weight, Lifestyle or Fitness.



I'm talking about clothing makeup fashion and accessories. We have a thread that was nearly derailed by Appearances about what Makes a Female a Lady. We have another thread about Modesty, its about Appearances. Women seem to feel at home asserting their position regarding what someone else is wearing.

I've been reading about how women seemingly dress for each other. They dress to go fishing for compliments from their peers and much less from the opposite sex.

Sorry chaps, women only dress to impress each other | Mail Online



I have only known of a handful of women who dress, not for men or women but for themselves. But I don't dress for other guys, or women. I dress for myself and most of the guys I know are pretty much like me in this respect.

There must be some kind of hidden pecking order that is established by Hoop Earrings and Heels.



I guess my bigger question is.... Why do women follow each other's Appearance, get jealous of each other's Appearance or look for the approval of each other's Appearance?
 
Searching4Truth

Searching4Truth

Senior Member
#2
Jul 25, 2012
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*Jedi mind trick* I'm sensing a man will try and answer this question...
 
AAAPlus

AAAPlus

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Aug 2, 2011
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I would like to point out that The Daily Mail is a tabloid, not a reliable news source.

I think this story is pretty much made up or extremely skewed. Women have learned over the generations that men are very sight-oriented, so they dress up to impress them.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

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#5
Aug 2, 2009
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I thought they just got dressed up so they aren't naked.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#7
Aug 2, 2009
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Searching4Truth said:
No, Zero. That's just you. :p
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Nah, I dress to impress. People take one look at me and are impressed with how brave I must be to go out like that.

Sometimes someone will ask me "Is that what you'll be wearing?" and I say "To what?" and they say "Today."

:p
 
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DuchessAimee

DuchessAimee

Senior Member
#8
Apr 27, 2011
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AAAPlus said:
I would like to point out that The Daily Mail is a tabloid, not a reliable news source.

I think this story is pretty much made up or extremely skewed. Women have learned over the generations that men are very sight-oriented, so they dress up to impress them.
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Nope. Wrong! Women dress for other women. And Elizabeth is right, it's insecurity among other issues. Men are easy to get attention from, women, not so much. And we dress for each other to receive compliments, statements like "oh where did you get that!" etc. It's about status, dominance, and creating a hierarchy. Ever heard of Alpha males? Women have that times 10. If you observe a group of women who are insecure (which is most of us) and who are uncomfortable with their "place" in the group, you can see them jockeying for a high status. Men, for instance, who are angry at each other will duke it out and then have resolution. Women will "fight" (meaning a verbal confrontation) and will keep score. She will remember the grievance the other person did to her, and if it was a huge deal, the group will splinter taking sides. However, they will hide the fact they've taken sides and pretend everything is fine.

Women perform for other women, dress for other women, because to them that's where acceptance and power lies. Yes, women dress for other men for sexual reasons, sure. But if you want friendship, which is the cornerstone for most women, you need to impress whomever you're seeking. And how do you do that? You dress to impress.

Oh, and the concept that women dress for other women is VERY old. Psychology has been all over it for about 50 years. The Daily Mail may be a tabloid, but they've done their research.
 
A

arwen83

Guest
#10
#10
I enjoy dressing nicely, I wear earrings and makeup (as you can see in my avatar). For myself, it has nothing to do with insecurity or jealousy, it is how I would like to present myself. Like Jullianna mentioned (i am paraphrasing), how we dress externally is reflective of what is internally. I find value in dressing a certain way, playing with colors and styles- kind of like an art. When I look at other women and see something nice that they are wearing- clothing, jewelery- I am not jealous, but appreciate the way it looks on her. I can tell she feels good it- and good for her! :D

Liamson, thank you for making this thread and preventing a derail! :)
 
Liamson

Liamson

Senior Member
#11
Feb 3, 2010
3,078
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#11
DuchessAimee said:
Nope. Wrong! Women dress for other women. And Elizabeth is right, it's insecurity among other issues. Men are easy to get attention from, women, not so much. And we dress for each other to receive compliments, statements like "oh where did you get that!" etc. It's about status, dominance, and creating a hierarchy. Ever heard of Alpha males? Women have that times 10. If you observe a group of women who are insecure (which is most of us) and who are uncomfortable with their "place" in the group, you can see them jockeying for a high status. Men, for instance, who are angry at each other will duke it out and then have resolution. Women will "fight" (meaning a verbal confrontation) and will keep score. She will remember the grievance the other person did to her, and if it was a huge deal, the group will splinter taking sides. However, they will hide the fact they've taken sides and pretend everything is fine.

Women perform for other women, dress for other women, because to them that's where acceptance and power lies. Yes, women dress for other men for sexual reasons, sure. But if you want friendship, which is the cornerstone for most women, you need to impress whomever you're seeking. And how do you do that? You dress to impress.

Oh, and the concept that women dress for other women is VERY old. Psychology has been all over it for about 50 years. The Daily Mail may be a tabloid, but they've done their research.
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Spot on.

I don't feel comfortable confirming my own suspicions.

The only examples that I can think of are where they have sourced their Appearance from something else like, Motorcycle culture, or Missionary culture or Active Fitness culture, or Nerd Culture but, I don't know if that is really avoiding anything or simply stepping into another arena.
 
D

Donkeyfish07

Guest
#12
#12
DuchessAimee said:
Women will "fight" (meaning a verbal confrontation) and will keep score. She will remember the grievance the other person did to her, and if it was a huge deal, the group will splinter taking sides. However, they will hide the fact they've taken sides and pretend everything is fine.

Women perform for other women, dress for other women, because to them that's where acceptance and power lies. Yes, women dress for other men for sexual reasons, sure.
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Female social structures are interesting. I think it's weird how different your minds work to ours. I've noticed a lot of attraction to guys are competition based too.....Like this gorgeous brunette I wanted to go out with back in the day wasn't interested until she seen me out with someone prettier. Then she wouldn't leave me alone, lol.

Also the dominance displays. They're fun to watch. Instead of a fist fight it's a barrage of fake smiles and subtle insults designed to lower the other girl's social status while raising your own. I'm glad I'm a guy, living like that would drive me bonkers.
 
Liamson

Liamson

Senior Member
#13
Feb 3, 2010
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#13
Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these -Luke 12:27

Yet we were designed by God. Women are beautiful. No matter where they go, there is no accessory that can outshine what God has made. I don't think adding to beauty makes it any more beautiful, it simply adds stuff to it.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#14
Aug 2, 2009
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#14
I'm actually looking forward to what Tommy4christ has to say about this.
 
Elizabeth619

Elizabeth619

Senior Member
#15
Jul 19, 2011
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Alot of it has to do with age. When I was 19 I was totally concerned with how I looked. I would not walk outside to get the mail without having a shower, makeup, hair did and stylish clothing. I'd even try to outdress my friends. Now I am 31, a mother who would sometimes forget to shower due to the fact that I had a baby to care for. He is 11 now and even still there are days(like today) where life gets too busy to look "hot". Between getting him off to school, running errands, housework, etc...you realize your priorities change as you get older and have more responsibility.
Now my friends and I get together from time to time. We compare stretch marks, and we go shopping we don't look for what is the "hottest" but what covers up all those things we once tried to show off back in the day.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#16
#16
I wear what I want to wear, regardless of cookie cutter fads. What works for one person won't for someone else, whether it's clothing, makeup or jewelry.

I dress for my mood, functionality and purpose. When I go to work, I dress professionally. When I want to feel pretty, I dress girlie. When I'm going for a hike or a run, I dress accordingly.

How we dress does affect how others react to us, whether we like it or not. I've noticed this particularly in what I wear to work.

I also like a guy who cares about what I wear. A couple of months ago I was going to buy a dress for the holidays, so I asked the man in my life which of two dresses he liked better. I was very pleased when he chose the more modest of the two. A lot of guys would not have. :)
h22B13866.jpg
 
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T

Tintin

Guest
#17
#17
You mean women don't dress up for ME? Outrageous!

But seriously, I don't find those open-cut dresses (neck to navel) some celebrities wear to be a turn-on, they're ugly and must be really breezy. They look like they've been flayed-open and left in a morgue.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#19
Aug 2, 2009
24,581
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#19
Liamson said:
Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these -Luke 12:27

Yet we were designed by God. Women are beautiful. No matter where they go, there is no accessory that can outshine what God has made. I don't think adding to beauty makes it any more beautiful, it simply adds stuff to it.
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That is still an amazing photo after all these years.
 
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