The Role of the Woman
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Thank you! ^.^
There are men who get custody, as I said, because the woman is obviously addicted to something, inept or violent. But this is rare, and when I say favor, I don't mean the law is written to favor them, I mean the judge will usually symaphize first with the woman. Everyone I have ever talked to, personally, who have dealt with family court says this. And you see it all over social media where this topic is discussed.
But since, as one said, staitisics are a drunkard's lamppost, then why post numbers to validate this? It doesn't appear that numbers AoK DID post were countered with any other numbers or a different interpretation of what he drew. No one actually talked about the numbers he posted, just assumed... which, is not honest listening and debate, imo.
There are men who get custody, as I said, because the woman is obviously addicted to something, inept or violent. But this is rare, and when I say favor, I don't mean the law is written to favor them, I mean the judge will usually symaphize first with the woman. Everyone I have ever talked to, personally, who have dealt with family court says this. And you see it all over social media where this topic is discussed.
But since, as one said, staitisics are a drunkard's lamppost, then why post numbers to validate this? It doesn't appear that numbers AoK DID post were countered with any other numbers or a different interpretation of what he drew. No one actually talked about the numbers he posted, just assumed... which, is not honest listening and debate, imo.
Considering the typical length of his posts and his use of language, I find it interesting that you feel the need to step in and speak for Ageofknowledge. He strikes me as a person who is more than capable of speaking for himself.
Additionally, your information re: family law is based on misunderstanding and not actual statistics. It's a myth that a woman is always given favorable status in the courts just because she's a mother.
Additionally, your information re: family law is based on misunderstanding and not actual statistics. It's a myth that a woman is always given favorable status in the courts just because she's a mother.
Perhaps I sympathize with taking a lot of time to write, google and research and put together something and the whole thing dismissed because people decided I (not the actual information or idea) was unreliable. It can be frustrating and honestly, most of us have "that soft spot" and maybe this is it for him.
I see a lot of hard words and very little compassion or attempt to understand his attitude. Doesn't excuse some of the things he said, but I almost get the impression that if he put it "the kind way" that he would encounter the same dismissal - maybe not the same rebuke, but he probably wouldn't get a honest discussion that way, either.
Perhaps he talks this way after trying several times to do it "the kind way." I know, I've been there.
Care to enlighten me? If I really am wrong, I'd like to know (and have reason to believe via sources, as well).
How about putting these ideas more concise next time 
. We are not writing essays and writing such long pieces is just time-consuming. If it were an academic forum that would be fine, but let's remember ideas are more important than the words used to communicate the ideas.
. We are not writing essays and writing such long pieces is just time-consuming. If it were an academic forum that would be fine, but let's remember ideas are more important than the words used to communicate the ideas.
I didn't mean that He never does, only that to expect life to roll smoothly because we obey is not biblical. The perfect marriage because you waited to have sex and got to know the guy is not something garenteed. Sometimes His blessing is not what we would think of as a blessing.
... God blesses us, for a fact. How we interpret blessings, is the subjective matter.
Discernment is not something, imo, that God hands you totally and fully when becoming a Christian. It's so something you grow in, and so something you will also make mistakes in, as well.
... God blesses us, for a fact. How we interpret blessings, is the subjective matter.
Discernment is not something, imo, that God hands you totally and fully when becoming a Christian. It's so something you grow in, and so something you will also make mistakes in, as well.
In law, in terms of the separation of powers, the judge's role is to interpret statute, whilst constitutionally representing the interests of the custodial and non-custodial parents' rights in a free country, albeit for the benefit of the affected child and his or her 'best interests.' The judge will make an order based on facts and apply them to law, which is why there are these separate parts to his judgment. If the body of common law (case made law or judge made law) precedents support that in general terms, there is a presumption that the mother or equivalent is preferred for custody, then on this basis she will indeed have that custody. However, no case is ever truly the same. What are the child's needs including their current residence, their school, their home-life, and in some cases where the child is of age their opinion may be valid. Financially is mother or father financially capable of providing for the child is also a substantive interest. Is mother or father able to morally raise that child and be a good parent according to the standard of the reasonable parent, that is the hypothetical parent. The judge will then look at the facts and determine whether mother, father, other relative is granted custody either based on their circumstances or alternatively if one or more is not reasonably capable of meeting the child's 'best interests, any other relative or non-relative as an alternative. The father or mother may be granted sole custody in situations where their parental skills are in question, where either has a drug or alcoholic habit, or other impediment which has a consequence to the child's best interests. So, it's not just a case that Mother automatically will be granted custody except that she is not dangerous. It also depends if there are parents living in two different states. It is rather complex.
I'd like to address the issue of more women than men accessing higher education in the U.S. Technically, this is a separate topic, but it's part of the talk here.
Higher education has remained largely unchanged for basically 100 years or more. The biggest changes to higher education in Western Society have involved issues of access (for women and minorities) and the more recent manifestations of online education and distance learning.
However, the underlying philosophies that drive higher education are based on the liberal arts model.
There have been two ideas proposed regarding higher education:
1. Men are not suited for the classroom AND
2. Something must be done to address the issue that more women than men are accessing higher education now in the U.S.
The first idea is completely false. Although there are some new ideas out there about men being more action and process oriented, HIGHER EDUCATION HAS REMAINED LARGELY UNCHANGED FOR ABOUT 100 YEARS. So, in 1915, when colleges in the U.S. were almost entirely populated by men, men didn't seem to struggle with the concepts of absorbing lecture and contemplative reading (the foundational skills of higher ed). It's a modern re-writing of history to pretend that men are too action-oriented to be still and listen or engage in deep philosophical thought. It also seems rather demeaning to men, IMO.
Of course, there are some individual men who find these skills more challenging. Perhaps 100 years ago these men would not have attended college. The truth is, there are plenty of job fields available to men who aren't particularly academic. They may not have the same cache as a college degree, but the income can be stable and substantial. I know, for example, that electricians and plumbers make more than I do.
The second idea is an idea based on competition. The reason more women are in college than men is because the playing field was leveled and women have been shown to be more apt academic competitors in the current system. The bar is the same--women must get the right grades for college acceptance, women must get the right scores on the SAT or ACT for college acceptance, women must fill out the same applications and write the same entrance essays. To complain that the field should be altered to favor men seems rather biased and a bit of sour grapes.
Now, you can argue that women aren't necessarily smarter than men, but only show more acceptable academic behaviors--and you'd be right. It's not an issue of intelligence. Being able to listen, work collaboratively, engage in thought experiments, maintain a basic level of organization, research, explore new ideas, synthesize various views, endure academic rigor, and engage with opposing philosophies are all skills needed to be successful in college. And they are skill sets readily available to any person who wishes to seek them.
You can also argue that the school system favors girls--and you'd be wrong. There are plenty of statistics that indicate that while very young girls might exhibit greater degrees of facility with language and social deftness, this evens out as students age. In fact, there are studies that show that boys are actually favored from middle school onward. (As a teacher, I can anecdotally confirm the favoritism that some teachers show towards boy students--and I have my own theories about why this is so).
Part of the reason that I think there's been a lowering in male college attendance is because many men are opting out of college. They're finding other avenues to pursue careers, whether entrepreneurial or on-the-job training.
Ultimately, the system is going to need to change to reflect the changing needs of our society. With so many people getting academic degrees, a BA or BS has less value than it previously did. People are having to get masters degrees for jobs that once required only a bachelors.
Higher education has remained largely unchanged for basically 100 years or more. The biggest changes to higher education in Western Society have involved issues of access (for women and minorities) and the more recent manifestations of online education and distance learning.
However, the underlying philosophies that drive higher education are based on the liberal arts model.
There have been two ideas proposed regarding higher education:
1. Men are not suited for the classroom AND
2. Something must be done to address the issue that more women than men are accessing higher education now in the U.S.
The first idea is completely false. Although there are some new ideas out there about men being more action and process oriented, HIGHER EDUCATION HAS REMAINED LARGELY UNCHANGED FOR ABOUT 100 YEARS. So, in 1915, when colleges in the U.S. were almost entirely populated by men, men didn't seem to struggle with the concepts of absorbing lecture and contemplative reading (the foundational skills of higher ed). It's a modern re-writing of history to pretend that men are too action-oriented to be still and listen or engage in deep philosophical thought. It also seems rather demeaning to men, IMO.
Of course, there are some individual men who find these skills more challenging. Perhaps 100 years ago these men would not have attended college. The truth is, there are plenty of job fields available to men who aren't particularly academic. They may not have the same cache as a college degree, but the income can be stable and substantial. I know, for example, that electricians and plumbers make more than I do.
The second idea is an idea based on competition. The reason more women are in college than men is because the playing field was leveled and women have been shown to be more apt academic competitors in the current system. The bar is the same--women must get the right grades for college acceptance, women must get the right scores on the SAT or ACT for college acceptance, women must fill out the same applications and write the same entrance essays. To complain that the field should be altered to favor men seems rather biased and a bit of sour grapes.
Now, you can argue that women aren't necessarily smarter than men, but only show more acceptable academic behaviors--and you'd be right. It's not an issue of intelligence. Being able to listen, work collaboratively, engage in thought experiments, maintain a basic level of organization, research, explore new ideas, synthesize various views, endure academic rigor, and engage with opposing philosophies are all skills needed to be successful in college. And they are skill sets readily available to any person who wishes to seek them.
You can also argue that the school system favors girls--and you'd be wrong. There are plenty of statistics that indicate that while very young girls might exhibit greater degrees of facility with language and social deftness, this evens out as students age. In fact, there are studies that show that boys are actually favored from middle school onward. (As a teacher, I can anecdotally confirm the favoritism that some teachers show towards boy students--and I have my own theories about why this is so).
Part of the reason that I think there's been a lowering in male college attendance is because many men are opting out of college. They're finding other avenues to pursue careers, whether entrepreneurial or on-the-job training.
Ultimately, the system is going to need to change to reflect the changing needs of our society. With so many people getting academic degrees, a BA or BS has less value than it previously did. People are having to get masters degrees for jobs that once required only a bachelors.
I think you missed my point. I mean the preconceived ideas (women being vulnerable, for example, is a prevelant image of single mothers, and even married women) being brought to the table automatically, before even considering the case, and it being an idea set to begin with, it skews the decisions or perspective of the judge. Would bias be a better word? Stereotype, perhaps?
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Well since I'm a virgin all I can say - you have no moral ground. But Ceile De and Ageofzeroknowledge and NOTah - you lose the moral ground. You've simply plumbed the depths. Yes your the adults. But your zero abilty to stick to the topic set, your petty name calling and your disgraceful attacks on women regardless of age sits you comfortably with the worst of society. Please don't even pretend your Christians. Clearly your not.
Well said, CeileDe. And you're wearing a Steelers hat! You Rock, my Brother!
Judges have a duty to be objective, or they could recuse their person from that case. Some judges are women, too. I don't know if judges view potential custodial parents as vulnerable, not unless some psych./ therapist report says so, or the guardian ad litem or the court appointed staff indicate so. According Grams, M. (2004), a female lawyer, men manipulate children to get access, so this would mean the father gets custody. I would like to see your research that evidences what you are claiming to be the case.
E
[h=2]Seven Misconceptions about Submission:[/h][h=4]Misconception #1: Submission is universal—the directive can be applied correctly by all, even those outside of the faith community.[/h]
Christian submission is defined by the relationship between God the Father and Son. It cannot be properly understood apart from that mooring. Hence, I believe it is unwise for us to uphold the instruction for wives to submit themselves to their husbands as an achievable standard for those outside the faith community. People without the indwelling power of the Holy Spirit have neither the discernment nor the power to live out submission and authority in a godly manner.
[h=4]Misconception #2: Submission is gender-exclusive—it’s just for women.[/h]
Men have a responsibility to submit too—it’s not just something that’s required of women. EVERY Christian, female or male, has the responsibility to submit to the Lord, and also to the authorities the Lord has placed in his or her life. What’s more, the biblical concepts of submission and authority cannot be disassociated. The two are indivisibly connected. A biblical definition of submission cannot be understood apart from a biblical definition of authority.
[h=4]Misconception #3: Submission is generic—every woman submits to every man.[/h]
The Bible instructs a wife to submit herself to her own husband; not to men in general.
[h=4]Misconception #4: Submission is a right—a husband has the right to demand his wife’s submission.[/h]
A husband does not have the right to demand or extract submission from his wife. Submission is HER choice—her responsibility… it is NOT his right!! Not ever. She is to “submit herself”— deciding when and how to submit is her call. In a Christian marriage, the focus is never on rights, but on personal responsibility. It’s his responsibility to be affectionate. It’s her responsibility to be agreeable. The husband’s responsibility is to sacrificially love as Christ loved the Church—not to make his wife submit.
[h=4]Misconception #5: Submission is indiscriminate—it means mindless acquiescence.[/h]
A Christian’s first responsibility is to submit to the Lord and His standard of righteousness. A wife is not called to submit to sin, mistreatment, or abuse. The Lord does not want “weak-willed” women—women who lack the discernment and strength to respond to the right things and in the right way. Godly women do not submit to sin. They carefully and intentionally weigh and discern how to submit to sinful human authority in light of their primary responsibility to submit to the ways of the Lord. No brain-dead doormats or spineless bowls of Jello here! Submission is neither mindless nor formulaic nor simplistic. Submitting to the Lord sometimes involves drawing clear boundaries and enacting consequences when a husband sins. Submission is an attitude of the heart. A woman can have a submissive spirit even when saying “no” and refusing to go along with sin.
[h=4]Misconception #6: Submission precludes mutuality—it creates lopsided, one-way relationships.[/h]
Submission and authority function hand-in-hand with all the other biblical directives about how Christians ought to interact with one another. Along with submitting to her husband, a Christian wife also has the responsibility to be transparent, speak truth, confront sin, and challenge her husband to ever increasing levels of holiness. As heirs together of the grace of life, both husband and wife have the responsibility to love, encourage, and build one another up; and to interact with forbearance, kindness and humility. Biblical authority and submission contribute to mutuality, and do not diminish or detract from it. (It’s “both-and” not “either-or.”)
[h=4]Misconception #7: Submission promotes abuse—it encourages husbands to be domineering, self-centered boors.[/h]
When properly understood and enacted, the framework of hierarchical relationships within the Christian community serves a protective function, because every authority is accountable to a higher authority. This community structure encourages husbands to fulfill their responsibility to love as Christ loves, and holds them to account when they don’t. It fosters Christlikeness and prevents abuse. A wife whose husband is abusive can appeal to higher authorities for intervention and protection. It is the responsibility of the authorities to protect and seek the good of all those under their care.
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