Dear reader. I have been a christian 30+ years. I started by asking God for wisdom, knowing there was a power and understanding in Jesus that spoke to my heart, but I did not know where or why it spoke to me. One word changed my life, love. At each level of my experience, still there was another layer, a deeper realisation of what that word meant.
I lead a house group on love above spiritual gifts, that the core mission of the church was to heal the heart, to make whole the soul and spirit of a person. I knew of people who believed in regression therapy but that just destroyed them. I knew that opening up old wounds often made them deeper. I began to realise we are an emotional history, with learnt reactions to things that we actually use everyday, which adjust depending on experience. We sow and build this framework and it defines us. If the Lord is to mean anything, he has to address this in our hearts. Rather than open old wounds, he makes new strengths, he puts in understanding and healing, so there is not a wound but a strong place to walk, we are remade.
I wondered at the cross, the cross being lifted up, as the golden snake that brought healing to all who saw it. Could it be that the actual realisation of God made man dying for us, remade us daily within, empowered us, as an intellectual and emotional experience, not just super spiritual experience in the spirit. Now it is not possible to see this truly without the Holy Spirit, but what if the lie is to make it too religious and not personal enough. Look around your life, and ask, who do you really know, love or care about? My experience of humans is we are so defensive, and so volatile, we almost trust no one. Jesus goes beyond this, saying at His core, at the very being of God, He loves us, and is willing to do the impossible.
Does Jesus reduce you to tears? Do you sing "I live to serve you each day." "You are my sunshine."
This is the spring of living water in us, the unstoppable flow, the reason why the apostles were happy to go to their deaths praising the Lord, because he literally transcends us at all levels.
Now the reason why someone says "confused mess" because the Lord has not spoken to them at this level.
St francis prayer
Make Me an Instrument of Your Peace has spoken to people for hundreds of years.
But for these guys this is not christianity. At this point we should walk away. I am talking a different language, yet I know exactly what they are saying. Mysticism does not ask what you are doing, just obedience because it is Gods work. But God is a God of order and real teaching, and confirmation of what has gone before. He does not make something new, but expands on all His previous revelation.
The Old covenant is a foreshadow of the new, it is not a change. You can find the heart of God, His love, His redemption in seeing the actual embodiment of the cross, before the cross, else Abraham, Enoch, Melkizidek could not have known God.
As I thought all those years ago, we are very lost and we want so badly to arrive, we will invent our own arrival, or reality.
And yes there is a failure in teaching, but mainly in this modern society a failure of emotional honesty and truth, because we are so terribly wealthy, we can run away from all the difficult issues.
Someone in a bretheren church said of the charismatic group, they say the same words as us, yet claim they are so different. The difference was the pure excitement at the word of God, but what it lead to was a split, and a group who did not last, but fizzled out, rather than renewed the whole. So which is it? Maybe both, but that is the task the Lord puts towards us, to let the Spirit give life to what is already there.
Now I have an agenda, like these NAR guys. The agenda is to speak to what we are, and to empower us to change through the cross, and letting love speak to who we are. This is the ministry of the Holy Spirit but it is not mysticism or some, woooo that felt good, I am soooo drunk, collapse on the floor, it is plain, I stand in front of you and say honestly I love you, without hesitation. That is the reality Jesus preached us to become, real, simple, open, honest, righteous people.
But do you believe it is possible or put it another way, do you believe Jesus?