I will abide by your rules: If you say you have had enough of me, I will simply post like "goodbye", and will post no more. By the way, I would have been one of those who reached out to you by e-mail, but I think it important to listen before one leaps in. At this point, I am so glad I did.
Are you sure you don't know what to believe? I am so impressed by this quote, and please don't think I'm fooling. How many church members have wished their pastor would put his time and effort into representing God the way you have put yours into just being yourself, and being honest? You have taken what looks like hours to carefully read, analyze and answer each post. And you are thanking everyone who reached out. And you are willing to admit God could change you. Almost no pastors would take that time with each person, almost no churches recognize the need to thank people for daring to get involved in something that could be threatening, and so few are willing to admit there's anything needed to be changed in them.
In the early church, when people heard from God about something the pastor didn't like, the church sent them to the world, and called them wandering apostles. Maybe that's all that happened; God has something different for you. Even if you make me stop talking to you, I will keep reading this thread. I want to watch it happen.