My crumpling marriage

My husband and I have been married for a year and a half. We have been together 2 and a half years. We have two small babies together. Lately we have been having issues in our marriage. Neither one of us has seen a successful marriage so we don't know how to be married. We have been separated since January 10. At that time my husband informed myself and my family that he no longer loved me and that he did not want to be with me. A few weeks later we ended up talking and he said he truly did love me but was tired of constant fighting. We agreed that we wanted to work on our marriage. About a month after that we got in a fight and he said that he was done. He didn't want to work on our marriage anymore. A few weeks after that my husband rededicated his life to Christ and was Baptized. Since then he has been actively pursuing classes through the church and even marriage counseling. I have been frightened that he only wanted to work on our marriage for our kids. (He loves them more than anything. Sometimes to the point I can honestly say I am jealous.) My husband spoke to the couple who are wanting to counsel us and after he spoke to them he said me a text saying that he had a lot on his mind. I asked him what all was said and if he was ok. He responded by saying he was worried that he wanted our marriage to work more for the kids than for us. He said he did love me but was scared to death that he wanted to work on our marriage for the kids. Now I'm sitting in my mom's family room trying not to cry. I've been so badly hurt but have done everything I can for this man. My husband was not raised in a Christian home. I introduced him back to church (his family used to go on special occasions). He is really stressed out about a lot of things and he is trying to straighten out his confusion. I joined this site because I need someone to speak with that won't take my side or his but will pray for me and talk with me about what I need to do. I am getting to the point that I don't care if he ends up wanting to stay with me or not, I just want to get past this pain. I have been going through this for a long time now. I don't want to think like that but this hurts too much. If anyone has any positive words of encouragement that would be great.

I will be praying for you and your husband and your kids as well Amber. The way I see it, you both need each other more than you think. I suggest you start meeting with Him more, talk to Him and both of you must try understanding each other coz then you can and will help each other. Also spend time in prayer and let God guide you, coz only through Him can a marriage be well. God bless

After being married now for more than thirty years, I can say that to have a god marriage takes work.
Love takes a commitment and risk.
But you need to give Him to Jesus , trusting in God to do the work on him that you could not.
It took me along time to learn this, but when I did in prayer, Jesus brought the healing in my husbands faith, and in our marriage.
Ask Jesus to give you His love and forgivness for your husband, praying daily for this.
Because once you begin in Jesus, His grace is set upon you both.
True healing takes time, and it may seem sometimes that it will never happen, but keep loving your husband, and work to bring back the intimacy that is the glue of your relationship.
God knew we needed this, that is why scripture speaks to submitting to each other in marraige.
You, your husband and children will be in my daily prayers in Jesus as long as you need.
Pm me if you need, Ill try to help where I can in Jesus.

Hugs and God bless
pickles

Praying for you both! Are you going to church with him? The Holy Spirit is the great healer of hurts and many times His is the only way to get rid of resentments.

Look toward the future, not in the past. Your husband is willing to work on your marriage...meet him at where he's at

Amber,

From what I know, most marriages go through rough patches...
When things got rough for me, I would talk to an older woman that I trusted.
Just having some one who has been married for a long time to talk to was very helpful.
(Its better if it not a family member.)

A book that helped me was..."Lord, only you can change me." By; Kay Arthur
If you want to Change your marriage, you can start with yourself...
The only way to make things different...is to be different.

I pray that God's perfect wisdom come to light in your life!
God Bless and take care, Shekaniah

Lots of couples go through what you're experiencing. If you can tough it out things might be better down the road. Your still young so emotions might flare more easily. as you get older you'll mellow out and might be easier to get along with each other. At least the kids will then grow up in a complete home. If they grow up with a broken family they'll grow up and honestly have seriously problems. Then when they try and have a family they likely will see it fall apart as that is what they grew up with. So I'd try and work it out if I were you. It's a minor road bump. Why are you guys fighting anyway. You guys got to mellow out and just talk about problems not argue.