NEED PRAYER NOW
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Heavenly Father we pray for Lynn and her husband John. We would pray that Lynn would know your love and protection at this time and would be really be aware of your presence, give her strength to keep going and help her with her back issues. We pray for John's continuing recover, Lord we ask you would guide the medics in all they do. We ask that they would be able to offload the fluid from the lungs and that the heart would be able to pump sufficient oxygen round to meet the bodies needs. In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ Amen
Latest update from Lynn....Just opened my email a minute ago and found this message reposting here for all.
Generalized Update on John
(I have given up thinking I'll make this short. lol)
I have a top three in things I fear:
1. A call to tell me to get there quick. (Or no rush.)
2. They told me he couldn't be on this EKMO machine for more than 10 days. (Today is his eighth day.)
3. Infection.
Number 3 hit! Infection! 102-degree temperature. Nurse said "small infection." Um, 102 degrees. He's never had a temperature higher than that since I've known him. What's a "big infection," because that seems big to me. They're testing to see which kind. (I never knew they could do that. They can, but only to a limited extent.)
Number 2 is not looming any more. The nurse tells me that the manufacturer sets that parameter and they've used it past that length, so don’t worry about that. She even gave me that cute little smirk that said, "I've heard that myth before and I'm not worried." (I like smirks. Most the ones I've ever seen were good smirks. For those who don't get why I'm talking smirks, it's because when I was writing my novel, my characters smirked a lot, and too many people told me smirks are considered mean.)
So, number 2 on my list of things I fear is being relegated down further on my list. (My fear list is long, but the rest of it is less important things. One is our humidifier is making a racket when it goes on. John's big on that humidifier being important for unclogged noses in winter and cuts down on our heating bill. Something about "Dry heat bad." Fortunately, we're in the 50's and 60's the last couple of days and it's supposed to rain tonight, so no dry heat to worry about right now. I'm going to look it up online to see if I can fix it. I think it's just the fan needs to be greased, but I'll learn more when I ca figure out which machine it is. John will be upset if he could have fixed it, but I bought a new one anyway. So, see? Only the top three on my fear list are important. The rest is just every day stuff I worry about.)
And how am I doing?
Kind of proud of myself. (This is something I usually talk to John about. He gets why I'm proud.) I have absolutely no sense of direction. The only way I can tell west from east is if the sun is out and it's not near noon. But there's a problem with that. You'd think New Jersey is east of Philadelphia, and it is, but Philadelphia is tilted. We don't go north to south. We go Northeast to Southwest. (Honest. They're two names for sections of Philly.) I'm from Jersey originally. The beauty of having no sense of direction in that state is it's both a small state and a peninsula. When I got lost, worst comes to worse, if I keep driving straight, within 90 minutes, I'll see the Delaware River (west), the Atlantic Ocean (east), or the Delaware Bay (south.) If I were going north, I would notice a bunch of high-rises and industry, which tells me I'm in North Jersey, so turn around. But ever since I moved to Philly, I have a fear of getting lost going west. The next noticeable river is the Mississippi, which is ten hours from here. lol
Between fearing I'd burst out crying while driving, (and, BTW, haven't cried in almost 2 days -- proud of that too), and fearing I'd get lost, I've been taking a taxi. That was getting too expensive, so I paid attention to how the driver went and wrote down the directions.
Today I drove! I wouldn't have been lost at all on the way there, if my mind didn't drift between the second and fourth light. (Worried about finding a parking garage down the street from the hospital.) I was supposed to turn left at the third light. University City. (The name of the section of Philly the hospital is in.) The problem with universities is students usually walk to class. That means many lights aren't for streets. They're for foot traffic. So got lost, but found some maintenance men who told me where to park. Ends up they also close down a couple of garages on the weekend. So the person telling people in cars why they can't park in that garage told me how to get to the garage that was open.
Guess where the garage was. Under the hospital across the street from the hospital I wanted to go to. (City. Three hospitals all in a row -- one for children, one for cancer, and one for U of Penn, aka hospital John's in.) Every time I went out for a smoke in the last week, I was looking at the building above where I parked my car. For someone with no sense of direction, that was very kind of God.
On the way home, I got lost too, but at least I realized I was at the edge of what I consider my neighborhood, so figured it out even before getting lost. I was in a right-turn-only lane so had to turn and then turn back.
I drove on the scariest road (Schuylkill Expressway) in Philadelphia twice today. After all that's happened in the last two weeks, t'ain't nothing anymore. John would be so proud.
But really really pray his infection goes away. I know infection + living-on-machines is NOT a good combination
Generalized Update on John
(I have given up thinking I'll make this short. lol)
I have a top three in things I fear:
1. A call to tell me to get there quick. (Or no rush.)
2. They told me he couldn't be on this EKMO machine for more than 10 days. (Today is his eighth day.)
3. Infection.
Number 3 hit! Infection! 102-degree temperature. Nurse said "small infection." Um, 102 degrees. He's never had a temperature higher than that since I've known him. What's a "big infection," because that seems big to me. They're testing to see which kind. (I never knew they could do that. They can, but only to a limited extent.)
Number 2 is not looming any more. The nurse tells me that the manufacturer sets that parameter and they've used it past that length, so don’t worry about that. She even gave me that cute little smirk that said, "I've heard that myth before and I'm not worried." (I like smirks. Most the ones I've ever seen were good smirks. For those who don't get why I'm talking smirks, it's because when I was writing my novel, my characters smirked a lot, and too many people told me smirks are considered mean.)
So, number 2 on my list of things I fear is being relegated down further on my list. (My fear list is long, but the rest of it is less important things. One is our humidifier is making a racket when it goes on. John's big on that humidifier being important for unclogged noses in winter and cuts down on our heating bill. Something about "Dry heat bad." Fortunately, we're in the 50's and 60's the last couple of days and it's supposed to rain tonight, so no dry heat to worry about right now. I'm going to look it up online to see if I can fix it. I think it's just the fan needs to be greased, but I'll learn more when I ca figure out which machine it is. John will be upset if he could have fixed it, but I bought a new one anyway. So, see? Only the top three on my fear list are important. The rest is just every day stuff I worry about.)
And how am I doing?
Kind of proud of myself. (This is something I usually talk to John about. He gets why I'm proud.) I have absolutely no sense of direction. The only way I can tell west from east is if the sun is out and it's not near noon. But there's a problem with that. You'd think New Jersey is east of Philadelphia, and it is, but Philadelphia is tilted. We don't go north to south. We go Northeast to Southwest. (Honest. They're two names for sections of Philly.) I'm from Jersey originally. The beauty of having no sense of direction in that state is it's both a small state and a peninsula. When I got lost, worst comes to worse, if I keep driving straight, within 90 minutes, I'll see the Delaware River (west), the Atlantic Ocean (east), or the Delaware Bay (south.) If I were going north, I would notice a bunch of high-rises and industry, which tells me I'm in North Jersey, so turn around. But ever since I moved to Philly, I have a fear of getting lost going west. The next noticeable river is the Mississippi, which is ten hours from here. lol
Between fearing I'd burst out crying while driving, (and, BTW, haven't cried in almost 2 days -- proud of that too), and fearing I'd get lost, I've been taking a taxi. That was getting too expensive, so I paid attention to how the driver went and wrote down the directions.
Today I drove! I wouldn't have been lost at all on the way there, if my mind didn't drift between the second and fourth light. (Worried about finding a parking garage down the street from the hospital.) I was supposed to turn left at the third light. University City. (The name of the section of Philly the hospital is in.) The problem with universities is students usually walk to class. That means many lights aren't for streets. They're for foot traffic. So got lost, but found some maintenance men who told me where to park. Ends up they also close down a couple of garages on the weekend. So the person telling people in cars why they can't park in that garage told me how to get to the garage that was open.
Guess where the garage was. Under the hospital across the street from the hospital I wanted to go to. (City. Three hospitals all in a row -- one for children, one for cancer, and one for U of Penn, aka hospital John's in.) Every time I went out for a smoke in the last week, I was looking at the building above where I parked my car. For someone with no sense of direction, that was very kind of God.
On the way home, I got lost too, but at least I realized I was at the edge of what I consider my neighborhood, so figured it out even before getting lost. I was in a right-turn-only lane so had to turn and then turn back.
I drove on the scariest road (Schuylkill Expressway) in Philadelphia twice today. After all that's happened in the last two weeks, t'ain't nothing anymore. John would be so proud.
But really really pray his infection goes away. I know infection + living-on-machines is NOT a good combination
Dear Father
Pease continue to be with John and Lynn. Thank You so much for bringing John this far and help him to continue to improve. Continue also to be with Lynn and give her the strength and ability to get back and forth to the hospital with not getting lost. Please continue to give them comfort and peace during this trial. In Jesus Name Amen.
Pease continue to be with John and Lynn. Thank You so much for bringing John this far and help him to continue to improve. Continue also to be with Lynn and give her the strength and ability to get back and forth to the hospital with not getting lost. Please continue to give them comfort and peace during this trial. In Jesus Name Amen.
Did an email check and this in from Lynn:
~[TABLE]
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[TD]Lynn
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[TD]5:20 PM (1 hour ago)
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John's temperature is back to normal, but the nurse says he still has an infection. (They don't know the cause.) Today was his day off, under the concept he needs to just rest without being poked and prodded as much as possible, so they put him into an even deeper sleep.
Next concern they have -- and she said it's "troublesome," not alarm -- is he's losing blood. Two pints yesterday. (I thought it was just a pint a day, but she says two isn't horrible.) One of the tubes that either take or return his blood is leaking. She doesn't seem to think that explains it though. He's been on a feeding tube for the last day and a half, so they're hoping he'll "go to the bathroom" (and he has a catheter, so no problem on the other side of that euphemism), to see if the bleeding could be in the intestine. No idea how asleep he is, but if he can help it, he won't do that in bed. (I don't think he can help it, but there are signs he is somewhat in control of himself. He always raises a leg up when he's sleeping, but he has to keep his legs straight, and has somehow gotten the message enough that he no longer raises up a leg.)
They had the TV on, so I had her put on the Giants/Redskins game. He always watches football on Sunday, and since it wasn't the Eagles, it wouldn't cause blood pressure problems. Add to that, we hate the Cowboys, don't like the Giants, but have no problems with the 'skins, (they're usually on the bottom in our division, so we feel sorry for 'skins fans lol), and with the 'skins beating the Giants, hoped it sunk through with him like this was a nice normal Sunday afternoon. I even apologized a couple of times for talking during a play.
Me? Got there and back without getting lost once, but I have finally had it with the 21st century. Forgot my debit card. I parked in a parking garage. Parking garages no longer take cash. WHAT? Fortunate, I took money. (I don't always, because I usually have my debit card. lol) There's an office open 24/7 in the hospital for just such things. On the good side, I met another woman who also hates the 21st century. She had her debit/credit card, but was stuck at the exit gate, (feet from where I parked my car), and was honking for an attendant. (No attendants.) So I was able to help her get the card to face correctly and work. Nice to have another person besides me stuck in the last century too. (I got the Information Center woman chuckling at someone not liking the 21st century. She was young enough that she probably doesn't remember much about the last century.)
Any idea how long it takes to have ripped muscles heal? They seem to be waiting for John to heal, but I have no idea how long that takes. It's eight days since his heart attack. I cut myself in the middle of summer, and still have the fading line to prove it, but John tends to take about one-quarter of the time to heal from cuts. Yeah, I know this isn't a cut. I'm just used to him healing faster.
~[TABLE]
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[TD]Lynn
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[TD]5:20 PM (1 hour ago)
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John's temperature is back to normal, but the nurse says he still has an infection. (They don't know the cause.) Today was his day off, under the concept he needs to just rest without being poked and prodded as much as possible, so they put him into an even deeper sleep.
Next concern they have -- and she said it's "troublesome," not alarm -- is he's losing blood. Two pints yesterday. (I thought it was just a pint a day, but she says two isn't horrible.) One of the tubes that either take or return his blood is leaking. She doesn't seem to think that explains it though. He's been on a feeding tube for the last day and a half, so they're hoping he'll "go to the bathroom" (and he has a catheter, so no problem on the other side of that euphemism), to see if the bleeding could be in the intestine. No idea how asleep he is, but if he can help it, he won't do that in bed. (I don't think he can help it, but there are signs he is somewhat in control of himself. He always raises a leg up when he's sleeping, but he has to keep his legs straight, and has somehow gotten the message enough that he no longer raises up a leg.)
They had the TV on, so I had her put on the Giants/Redskins game. He always watches football on Sunday, and since it wasn't the Eagles, it wouldn't cause blood pressure problems. Add to that, we hate the Cowboys, don't like the Giants, but have no problems with the 'skins, (they're usually on the bottom in our division, so we feel sorry for 'skins fans lol), and with the 'skins beating the Giants, hoped it sunk through with him like this was a nice normal Sunday afternoon. I even apologized a couple of times for talking during a play.
Me? Got there and back without getting lost once, but I have finally had it with the 21st century. Forgot my debit card. I parked in a parking garage. Parking garages no longer take cash. WHAT? Fortunate, I took money. (I don't always, because I usually have my debit card. lol) There's an office open 24/7 in the hospital for just such things. On the good side, I met another woman who also hates the 21st century. She had her debit/credit card, but was stuck at the exit gate, (feet from where I parked my car), and was honking for an attendant. (No attendants.) So I was able to help her get the card to face correctly and work. Nice to have another person besides me stuck in the last century too. (I got the Information Center woman chuckling at someone not liking the 21st century. She was young enough that she probably doesn't remember much about the last century.)
Any idea how long it takes to have ripped muscles heal? They seem to be waiting for John to heal, but I have no idea how long that takes. It's eight days since his heart attack. I cut myself in the middle of summer, and still have the fading line to prove it, but John tends to take about one-quarter of the time to heal from cuts. Yeah, I know this isn't a cut. I'm just used to him healing faster.
M
Hi Lynn bless you,
I think you are a bit like me and use humour to deal with life's problems but
inside things aren't that amusing.
Incidentally catheters can cause infections I think the stats are around 70%
of people on catheters get water infections and the longer they are in, the
higher the chance of an infection. Maybe the hosp have already tested, but you
might want to ask them.
Praying for continued healing in John in all aspects of him, physically, mentally
and spiritually and for yourself. Lord bless Lynn, give her rest when she is
in bed, watch over her and keep from harm. Give her wisdom and may your
peace rest over her.
Amen
I think you are a bit like me and use humour to deal with life's problems but
inside things aren't that amusing.
Incidentally catheters can cause infections I think the stats are around 70%
of people on catheters get water infections and the longer they are in, the
higher the chance of an infection. Maybe the hosp have already tested, but you
might want to ask them.
Praying for continued healing in John in all aspects of him, physically, mentally
and spiritually and for yourself. Lord bless Lynn, give her rest when she is
in bed, watch over her and keep from harm. Give her wisdom and may your
peace rest over her.
Amen
Wasn't on the computer much today and just checking my emails and this came in from Lynn.
~[TABLE="class: cf gJ"]
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[TD="class: gF gK"][TABLE="class: cf ix"]
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[TD][h=3]Lynn[/h][/TD]
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[TD="class: gH"]10:12 AM (12 hours ago)
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I found out how someone can have an infection without a fever. White blood cell counts. I don't know what the numbers mean, but he's supposed to have an 8 count for white blood cells. His is 25.1. The nurse says she's thinking positive because it was 25.6 the day before. I see "three times what they should be," so not good.
He's still bleeding somewhere, but I'm taking that he only needed one pint of blood yesterday as a good sign, because it was two pints the day before.
They were sedating him with an anesthetic called Propofol. (I gave a blank look to the nurse, not recognizing the name of the drug, so she told me it was the drug that killed Michael Jackson.) But they don't dare keep him on that, so he was awake for my whole visit. He's also in pain. Worse yet, he hardly likes to take Aleve when he's in pain, so when the nurse said he was at the highest amounts he can be given, but she has an order in for more pain meds, I asked him if he wanted more. He didn't respond.
He didn't respond much during my visit. It upset me more than the two days before when he slept through my whole visit. (Back to crying again.) But overnight, I've decided to ask him what's going on. I figure it's he hurts too much, he's too groggy, he's not all there (brain damage), he's very depressed, or he's angry at something (or me.) So I can come up with reasons, but the best choice is he's too groggy.
They're seeing if they can wean him off the ventilator. He was on 100% oxygen, so yesterday they took it down to 90% to see if he can make up the difference on his own. I made a deal with the nurse -- if she can get him down to 0% overnight and he makes it on his own, I'll give her the winning lottery ticket that blows into my hand. My parting words, but as I was walking down the hall, I realized I really would, if I could.
Minor miracle has happened. We are able to get refunded some of our real estate taxes every year, so I wait until November to use that money toward Christmas. I was a bookkeeper, so know how to file the form. By my calculations (and it's not hard to come up with the numbers to do the calculations), we were supposed to get $250 back. We missed getting $300 back because together we made $82 more last year than the line between $250 and $300. (Fine with me being too rich. lol) But the increments are all by $50, so the choices were: $250, $300, $350, $400, or $500. They gave us $375. Makes no sense, but we'll take it!
Another minor miracle. Our humidifier was making a awful racket at startup. It reminded me of the sound when a pebble got into our bell housing in our Maverick decades ago. (Bell housing has something to do with keeping a fan in the engine from getting hit by debris, but obviously that didn't work that time. lol) I'm as non mechanically-inclined as possible, but keeping humidity in our house is important to John. Something about making heat more efficient because it's very dry in winter. So, I know he'd be upset, if he knew I didn't keep the humidifier running, but he'd also be upset if it was a minor problem, but I decided to get a new humidifier instead. So, I took a look at the motor and fans to see if maybe something was caught up in the fans. No such luck, but I found a lot of dust there, so cleaned that up. Miracle! It worked! I really didn't fix anything but the noise stopped. The humidifier is working again.
I tried joining CC again last night. Didn't take. I think I know what went wrong. I tried using the same name. When I have a chance, I'll try again. Seems dumb to have updates go through you, when I can update it. But for now, thank you so much. I asked John if he wanted me to call the elders of the church we would belong to if we could go to church, but he shook his head No. So we can use as many prayers as we can get. I fear my prayer remains too short -- "Fix him, God. Bring him back to me, but not worse than he was."
~[TABLE="class: cf gJ"]
[TR="class: acZ"]
[TD="class: gF gK"][TABLE="class: cf ix"]
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[TD][h=3]Lynn[/h][/TD]
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[TD="class: gH"]10:12 AM (12 hours ago)
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[TD="class: gH"][/TD]
[TD="class: gH acX"]
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[TR="class: acZ xD"]
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I found out how someone can have an infection without a fever. White blood cell counts. I don't know what the numbers mean, but he's supposed to have an 8 count for white blood cells. His is 25.1. The nurse says she's thinking positive because it was 25.6 the day before. I see "three times what they should be," so not good.
He's still bleeding somewhere, but I'm taking that he only needed one pint of blood yesterday as a good sign, because it was two pints the day before.
They were sedating him with an anesthetic called Propofol. (I gave a blank look to the nurse, not recognizing the name of the drug, so she told me it was the drug that killed Michael Jackson.) But they don't dare keep him on that, so he was awake for my whole visit. He's also in pain. Worse yet, he hardly likes to take Aleve when he's in pain, so when the nurse said he was at the highest amounts he can be given, but she has an order in for more pain meds, I asked him if he wanted more. He didn't respond.
He didn't respond much during my visit. It upset me more than the two days before when he slept through my whole visit. (Back to crying again.) But overnight, I've decided to ask him what's going on. I figure it's he hurts too much, he's too groggy, he's not all there (brain damage), he's very depressed, or he's angry at something (or me.) So I can come up with reasons, but the best choice is he's too groggy.
They're seeing if they can wean him off the ventilator. He was on 100% oxygen, so yesterday they took it down to 90% to see if he can make up the difference on his own. I made a deal with the nurse -- if she can get him down to 0% overnight and he makes it on his own, I'll give her the winning lottery ticket that blows into my hand. My parting words, but as I was walking down the hall, I realized I really would, if I could.
Minor miracle has happened. We are able to get refunded some of our real estate taxes every year, so I wait until November to use that money toward Christmas. I was a bookkeeper, so know how to file the form. By my calculations (and it's not hard to come up with the numbers to do the calculations), we were supposed to get $250 back. We missed getting $300 back because together we made $82 more last year than the line between $250 and $300. (Fine with me being too rich. lol) But the increments are all by $50, so the choices were: $250, $300, $350, $400, or $500. They gave us $375. Makes no sense, but we'll take it!
Another minor miracle. Our humidifier was making a awful racket at startup. It reminded me of the sound when a pebble got into our bell housing in our Maverick decades ago. (Bell housing has something to do with keeping a fan in the engine from getting hit by debris, but obviously that didn't work that time. lol) I'm as non mechanically-inclined as possible, but keeping humidity in our house is important to John. Something about making heat more efficient because it's very dry in winter. So, I know he'd be upset, if he knew I didn't keep the humidifier running, but he'd also be upset if it was a minor problem, but I decided to get a new humidifier instead. So, I took a look at the motor and fans to see if maybe something was caught up in the fans. No such luck, but I found a lot of dust there, so cleaned that up. Miracle! It worked! I really didn't fix anything but the noise stopped. The humidifier is working again.
I tried joining CC again last night. Didn't take. I think I know what went wrong. I tried using the same name. When I have a chance, I'll try again. Seems dumb to have updates go through you, when I can update it. But for now, thank you so much. I asked John if he wanted me to call the elders of the church we would belong to if we could go to church, but he shook his head No. So we can use as many prayers as we can get. I fear my prayer remains too short -- "Fix him, God. Bring him back to me, but not worse than he was."
M
Hi Lynn, keep praying keep pressing in. Your prayers
have just as much value and worth as those of any pastors and elders.
I found that out in October when my Aunt was in a desperate condition.
I took a small bottle of olive oil to the hospital too and prayed over her
and anointed her myself several times.
Since then life has been difficult it has had its challenges she is still
in hospital but God is still working in that situation.
I say this not to detract from your own position, but to encourage you and
give you hope. My situation was very similar to yours and through all the upset
and fears I had, God has continued to work in His perfect timing. I want it all
quicker but He obviously knows best.
He does in your situation too I promise.
I just wish I could give you a big hug and tell you I know just how you are feeling
right now.
You remain in my prayers.
x
have just as much value and worth as those of any pastors and elders.
I found that out in October when my Aunt was in a desperate condition.
I took a small bottle of olive oil to the hospital too and prayed over her
and anointed her myself several times.
Since then life has been difficult it has had its challenges she is still
in hospital but God is still working in that situation.
I say this not to detract from your own position, but to encourage you and
give you hope. My situation was very similar to yours and through all the upset
and fears I had, God has continued to work in His perfect timing. I want it all
quicker but He obviously knows best.
He does in your situation too I promise.
I just wish I could give you a big hug and tell you I know just how you are feeling
right now.
You remain in my prayers.
x
Was up with the chickens checking email and this is latest update from Lynn.
Lynn
~John Update
Good news. Bad news.
Good news. He's getting off the lung part of the machine tomorrow. (Not to be confused with the ventilator.) The lung part of the machine does the oxygenating of the blood right through the lungs. They tested him, and, sure enough, his lungs are generating enough, (as much as the rest of us do it), oxygen that he will be taken off the machine and his blood kept where it belongs -- in him. He will stop looking like a Borg.
Bad news. Yesterday his white blood count was 25.1, aka 3 times higher than it ought to be, but his fever left. Today it is at 40, and his fever is 102 degrees. That machine pumping his blood out and back in cools the blood a little. So, when it's removed his fever will hit 103 or 104. Chances are that machine caused the infection, so it's good to get him off it, but taking him off doesn't fight the infection. It might stop adding to it.
My aunt had a heart attack several years ago. The heart attack didn't kill her. Three weeks later, an infection did. It happens all the time, the very reason I feared he'd get an infection.
The infection might have explained his non-reaction yesterday. Today he was less awake. (I guess they found something else to sedate him.) When I went today, they had his TV on… to a soap opera! Aren't men allergic to soap operas? I've never met a man who enjoyed them. I know he hates them, so I quickly switched the channel. His eyes opened and he smiled at me. So all is okay with me tonight, except I'm really worried about the infection. (Laid hands and prayed, but boy, my prayers are too simple. Still stuck with "Lord, stop the infection." How do others pray long prayers with pretty words that provide comfort? Wish I had that sometime.)
Oh, and today I over did intentionally, so I could make tomorrow a simpler day. Went grocery shopping and visited him -- apparently at the busiest time for people parking there. (Why do people honk there horns when traffic is at a standstill. Do they think the laws of physics do not apply if they're in a hurry. "Go through those ten cars in front of you. Run down those people who dare cross the street. That red light doesn’t mean anything. Go go go!) I took the last parking spot before the entrance of hell. (Okay it was the last parking spot at the lowest level, but there was LOUD -- can't hear yourself think loud -- steam coming out of a building about 20 yards from my car, so it felt like hell had an indoor swimming pool nearby.) And then came home during rush hour traffic on the one expressway in Philly that can bottleneck so well, it made it in the top 25 list in the country. BUT I did that on purpose, because if traffic wasn't inching along (half an hour to go three-quarters of a mile), no one was ever going to let the cars coming off the ramp onto the road. (Had just enough room to get my right front bumper in between two stopped cars in the left lane. lol) So, I'm sing the Twelve Days of Christmas at the top of my lungs with idiots honking all around me. Honking! Only supposed to be don eon the sixth day. lol
And then it was trash night. Oh, and true joy, one of my teeth chipped during dinner. The type of chip that's going to cause a bump on my tongue. Somehow I have to fit in a dentist appointment. I'm not sure I can. If they have to take it out. Someone is supposed to take me home. Um, John's busy sleeping (and fighting for his life.)
Is God trying to tell me something?
Lynn
~John Update
Good news. Bad news.
Good news. He's getting off the lung part of the machine tomorrow. (Not to be confused with the ventilator.) The lung part of the machine does the oxygenating of the blood right through the lungs. They tested him, and, sure enough, his lungs are generating enough, (as much as the rest of us do it), oxygen that he will be taken off the machine and his blood kept where it belongs -- in him. He will stop looking like a Borg.
Bad news. Yesterday his white blood count was 25.1, aka 3 times higher than it ought to be, but his fever left. Today it is at 40, and his fever is 102 degrees. That machine pumping his blood out and back in cools the blood a little. So, when it's removed his fever will hit 103 or 104. Chances are that machine caused the infection, so it's good to get him off it, but taking him off doesn't fight the infection. It might stop adding to it.
My aunt had a heart attack several years ago. The heart attack didn't kill her. Three weeks later, an infection did. It happens all the time, the very reason I feared he'd get an infection.
The infection might have explained his non-reaction yesterday. Today he was less awake. (I guess they found something else to sedate him.) When I went today, they had his TV on… to a soap opera! Aren't men allergic to soap operas? I've never met a man who enjoyed them. I know he hates them, so I quickly switched the channel. His eyes opened and he smiled at me. So all is okay with me tonight, except I'm really worried about the infection. (Laid hands and prayed, but boy, my prayers are too simple. Still stuck with "Lord, stop the infection." How do others pray long prayers with pretty words that provide comfort? Wish I had that sometime.)
Oh, and today I over did intentionally, so I could make tomorrow a simpler day. Went grocery shopping and visited him -- apparently at the busiest time for people parking there. (Why do people honk there horns when traffic is at a standstill. Do they think the laws of physics do not apply if they're in a hurry. "Go through those ten cars in front of you. Run down those people who dare cross the street. That red light doesn’t mean anything. Go go go!) I took the last parking spot before the entrance of hell. (Okay it was the last parking spot at the lowest level, but there was LOUD -- can't hear yourself think loud -- steam coming out of a building about 20 yards from my car, so it felt like hell had an indoor swimming pool nearby.) And then came home during rush hour traffic on the one expressway in Philly that can bottleneck so well, it made it in the top 25 list in the country. BUT I did that on purpose, because if traffic wasn't inching along (half an hour to go three-quarters of a mile), no one was ever going to let the cars coming off the ramp onto the road. (Had just enough room to get my right front bumper in between two stopped cars in the left lane. lol) So, I'm sing the Twelve Days of Christmas at the top of my lungs with idiots honking all around me. Honking! Only supposed to be don eon the sixth day. lol
And then it was trash night. Oh, and true joy, one of my teeth chipped during dinner. The type of chip that's going to cause a bump on my tongue. Somehow I have to fit in a dentist appointment. I'm not sure I can. If they have to take it out. Someone is supposed to take me home. Um, John's busy sleeping (and fighting for his life.)
Is God trying to tell me something?
Latest update from Lynn in my email today....
Lynn
~Ends up CC won't let me back on. Oh well.
(John is still alive.)
Oh, crap! Got an unexpected call this morning from the hospital. They're warning me (and getting advance permission) that he might have to go on kidney dialysis. Again, I was so surprised by the call, that I didn't hear half of what she said, despite listening as well as I could. From what I got, kidneys do two things -- filter blood and wash out any excess fluids. His are doing the second thing fine, but not the first thing. (And, I don't really get that, so will have to ask more when I go in.)
No, not necessarily permanent dialysis. Probably not, but they are not doing the filtering thing well. His entire body took a big hit, and this is the second thing that has been caused by it. And they're not talking "a few hours a day." They're talking putting him on the machine 24 hours a day to work slowly. Which means another line goes into his neck, (preferably) or in his groin, (second best option.)
You know the saying, "heavy heart?" My heart has literally felt that for the last two weeks. It was just beginning to rise -- feeling like it was going back to where it belonged. It just sunk again.
If that's not enough, my oldest brother called last night. (First person in the family to find out what's going on.) My older brother, (I have two brothers older than I am, two brothers younger, and a younger sister, so superlatives explaining which brother works), lost his part-time job, so he's coming up to clean up Dad's house. This is the guy who never did any housework, but counted on sympathetic dates to do it for him. It looked like his small chandelier (simple country style, not mansion type) had a veil over it, but it wasn't. It was a thick layer of cobwebs. And he had three inches of dead insect carcasses under his frog aquarium because he turned the light on above it and open the window to attract bugs at night. When the bugs hit the light, it would stun them and they'd fall. Some fell in with the frogs and became dinner. Others fell under and died. This is the brother moving in with Dad to clean the house. That tells volumes of how much hoarding Dad has been doing. (I see that brother doing good in the cleanup.) Meanwhile my oldest brother presses on to go through the legal preceding necessary to put Dad through detox before placing him in an assisted-living home.
Sounds like the annual family Christmas get-together is canceled.
Lynn
~Ends up CC won't let me back on. Oh well.
(John is still alive.)
Oh, crap! Got an unexpected call this morning from the hospital. They're warning me (and getting advance permission) that he might have to go on kidney dialysis. Again, I was so surprised by the call, that I didn't hear half of what she said, despite listening as well as I could. From what I got, kidneys do two things -- filter blood and wash out any excess fluids. His are doing the second thing fine, but not the first thing. (And, I don't really get that, so will have to ask more when I go in.)
No, not necessarily permanent dialysis. Probably not, but they are not doing the filtering thing well. His entire body took a big hit, and this is the second thing that has been caused by it. And they're not talking "a few hours a day." They're talking putting him on the machine 24 hours a day to work slowly. Which means another line goes into his neck, (preferably) or in his groin, (second best option.)
You know the saying, "heavy heart?" My heart has literally felt that for the last two weeks. It was just beginning to rise -- feeling like it was going back to where it belonged. It just sunk again.
If that's not enough, my oldest brother called last night. (First person in the family to find out what's going on.) My older brother, (I have two brothers older than I am, two brothers younger, and a younger sister, so superlatives explaining which brother works), lost his part-time job, so he's coming up to clean up Dad's house. This is the guy who never did any housework, but counted on sympathetic dates to do it for him. It looked like his small chandelier (simple country style, not mansion type) had a veil over it, but it wasn't. It was a thick layer of cobwebs. And he had three inches of dead insect carcasses under his frog aquarium because he turned the light on above it and open the window to attract bugs at night. When the bugs hit the light, it would stun them and they'd fall. Some fell in with the frogs and became dinner. Others fell under and died. This is the brother moving in with Dad to clean the house. That tells volumes of how much hoarding Dad has been doing. (I see that brother doing good in the cleanup.) Meanwhile my oldest brother presses on to go through the legal preceding necessary to put Dad through detox before placing him in an assisted-living home.
Sounds like the annual family Christmas get-together is canceled.
Thanks so much to everyone praying for Lynn and John after checking email this is the latest update from Lynn.
~Lynn
All good news today. I did a generalized post for the Prayer Request forum, because I finally have time to put up the Christmas tree! lol
- - - - -
Good News Update on John
They scared me for a bit. They moved him. But they moved him into the luxury suite. Well, technically not, but his last room was so small I had to get up every time they were changing meds or checking machines, because my knees were in the way when I sat in the chair. This room? He has a window! There's enough room to put a cot. (And don't think I'm not considering that either. lol) I pulled up the chair closer to his bed and didn't have to move when the nurse was futzing with his gizmos. (Lots of gizmos, but about one-third of what he used to have.)
So the nurse said this was where patients who will be spending some time with them stay. He whispered that like John might not want to hear it. Yeesh! My biggest fear in the last two weeks has been he won't spend much time there. "Some time" means they expect him to have time! That's a good thing!
AND, if that's not enough they're weaning him off a whole bunch of stuff. One machine still helps his heart out. It doesn't have to. His white blood count has gone down to 32. (Yesterday 38.5. Day before, he reached up to 46. 40 is danger zone. Suddenly that 25.1 I worried about last week does look good. It's supposed to be around 8-10, just to get some idea what's good.) So they're weaning him off more meds. And, the biggy -- that which makes him most uncomfortable and that which stops us from talking -- the ventilator! They're going to try taking that out in the next 24 hours! Woot woot!!!
Granted, he still has the open-heart surgery coming, but a breather (literally) would be nice. Normal white blood count would be nice. Finding out what he wants would be very nice!
Several things have also happened in the last 48 hours. I was turned onto a new song. (Eternally grateful, Candance!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YNqo4Un2uZI It wasn't well the first time I heard it, but I know God wanted it to be so I kept listening. Now it is. To the point that was my first thought when I woke up this morning. (Two weeks ago it was JOHN! with a panic. Didn't even get that moment so many talk about between asleep and awake to forget.) "Through it all my eyes are on you."
I park under one hospital, walk out of that one to go across the street to John's hospital. I have a smoke in between. There's only this one small spot where smokers can some, in front of a third hospital (CHOP -- Children's Hospital of Philadelphia -- famous place.) It has a raised garden with pansies that are still blooming and some kind of ground cover under small trees. The ground cover is somewhat blah, but once a year it has small purple flowers in it. That time of year was two months ago. Yesterday, I took a plate of raspberry brownies for John's nurses. (Raspberry brownies -- the ultimate comfort food for me. The two best taste in the world -- chocolate and raspberries. In case you don't know the story, I have decided God created raspberries specifically because he knew I'd come along eventually and would truly appreciate that invention more than most do, so raspberries and chocolate. Can't get better than that, and I really want the nurses to know how much I appreciate their efforts.) Well, I saw something small and purple in that ground cover yesterday. (BTW, purple! My favorite color. lol) Nah! It flowers two months ago, so couldn't be. That and I am right smack in the middle of a large city, so someone might steal the brownies if I went to look. And my hands shake. (I finally figured out what that is. It's called "effective tremors." Something people get sometimes in their 40's-60's. It is no big deal -- except I can't take pictures of my garden anymore -- unless it gets really bad. It sounds like it doesn’t get that worse for most. Worse yet, it gets worse with stress, so it's been annoying lately, especially since my signature became required by the hospital and they probably think I got that course doctors take to write illegibly. lol Hey, I went to Catholic school for my first 4.5 grades, so "good penmanship" was stressed.) So I was curious what that small purple thing was, but didn't look.
Today I looked. It is one of those flowers. One tiny, quiet tenuous flower unaware it's past its prime in the middle of nothing worth looking at in a huge city hiding in a sea of humanity bustling back and forth through hospitals. Many worried about a loved one. Others taking care of those loved ones. Others students. So busy no one noticed. God said, "Yes. I noticed. I did that. I do that for all of mine -- including John and including you."
John is more awake, looks like he's uncomfortable, and hurts. I told him it's okay because this is better. I asked him if he knew how long he'd been in the hospital. He shook his head no. I told him that at that exact moment two weeks ago I was being annoying and gabby as I took him to the ER. (Still can't believe I was trying to be calm and cautious so my driving didn't scare him, all the time he's in the middle of a massive heart attack. Good thing. Had I known that -- my driving would have been terrible.)
I asked him the two questions I needed to ask.
"Are you at peace with God through this? Not saying this is the end, it's not, but… all this! A lot to take in." He shook his head No. I told him it took me two weeks to get there and he slept through most of it, so that's okay.
(And then the nurse had to check on something, so there was a pause.)
Then I asked him, "Do you trust he is still the good shepherd? He is leading us where it is good for us to go." He nodded and all his angst and twitching calmed for a few minutes.
I think he's going to make it. Am I reading the signs right? Or is this just Lynn the Optimist seeing out of my lavender glasses still? (Let me keep my glasses on for a while. lol)
~Lynn
All good news today. I did a generalized post for the Prayer Request forum, because I finally have time to put up the Christmas tree! lol
- - - - -
Good News Update on John
They scared me for a bit. They moved him. But they moved him into the luxury suite. Well, technically not, but his last room was so small I had to get up every time they were changing meds or checking machines, because my knees were in the way when I sat in the chair. This room? He has a window! There's enough room to put a cot. (And don't think I'm not considering that either. lol) I pulled up the chair closer to his bed and didn't have to move when the nurse was futzing with his gizmos. (Lots of gizmos, but about one-third of what he used to have.)
So the nurse said this was where patients who will be spending some time with them stay. He whispered that like John might not want to hear it. Yeesh! My biggest fear in the last two weeks has been he won't spend much time there. "Some time" means they expect him to have time! That's a good thing!
AND, if that's not enough they're weaning him off a whole bunch of stuff. One machine still helps his heart out. It doesn't have to. His white blood count has gone down to 32. (Yesterday 38.5. Day before, he reached up to 46. 40 is danger zone. Suddenly that 25.1 I worried about last week does look good. It's supposed to be around 8-10, just to get some idea what's good.) So they're weaning him off more meds. And, the biggy -- that which makes him most uncomfortable and that which stops us from talking -- the ventilator! They're going to try taking that out in the next 24 hours! Woot woot!!!
Granted, he still has the open-heart surgery coming, but a breather (literally) would be nice. Normal white blood count would be nice. Finding out what he wants would be very nice!
Several things have also happened in the last 48 hours. I was turned onto a new song. (Eternally grateful, Candance!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YNqo4Un2uZI It wasn't well the first time I heard it, but I know God wanted it to be so I kept listening. Now it is. To the point that was my first thought when I woke up this morning. (Two weeks ago it was JOHN! with a panic. Didn't even get that moment so many talk about between asleep and awake to forget.) "Through it all my eyes are on you."
I park under one hospital, walk out of that one to go across the street to John's hospital. I have a smoke in between. There's only this one small spot where smokers can some, in front of a third hospital (CHOP -- Children's Hospital of Philadelphia -- famous place.) It has a raised garden with pansies that are still blooming and some kind of ground cover under small trees. The ground cover is somewhat blah, but once a year it has small purple flowers in it. That time of year was two months ago. Yesterday, I took a plate of raspberry brownies for John's nurses. (Raspberry brownies -- the ultimate comfort food for me. The two best taste in the world -- chocolate and raspberries. In case you don't know the story, I have decided God created raspberries specifically because he knew I'd come along eventually and would truly appreciate that invention more than most do, so raspberries and chocolate. Can't get better than that, and I really want the nurses to know how much I appreciate their efforts.) Well, I saw something small and purple in that ground cover yesterday. (BTW, purple! My favorite color. lol) Nah! It flowers two months ago, so couldn't be. That and I am right smack in the middle of a large city, so someone might steal the brownies if I went to look. And my hands shake. (I finally figured out what that is. It's called "effective tremors." Something people get sometimes in their 40's-60's. It is no big deal -- except I can't take pictures of my garden anymore -- unless it gets really bad. It sounds like it doesn’t get that worse for most. Worse yet, it gets worse with stress, so it's been annoying lately, especially since my signature became required by the hospital and they probably think I got that course doctors take to write illegibly. lol Hey, I went to Catholic school for my first 4.5 grades, so "good penmanship" was stressed.) So I was curious what that small purple thing was, but didn't look.
Today I looked. It is one of those flowers. One tiny, quiet tenuous flower unaware it's past its prime in the middle of nothing worth looking at in a huge city hiding in a sea of humanity bustling back and forth through hospitals. Many worried about a loved one. Others taking care of those loved ones. Others students. So busy no one noticed. God said, "Yes. I noticed. I did that. I do that for all of mine -- including John and including you."
John is more awake, looks like he's uncomfortable, and hurts. I told him it's okay because this is better. I asked him if he knew how long he'd been in the hospital. He shook his head no. I told him that at that exact moment two weeks ago I was being annoying and gabby as I took him to the ER. (Still can't believe I was trying to be calm and cautious so my driving didn't scare him, all the time he's in the middle of a massive heart attack. Good thing. Had I known that -- my driving would have been terrible.)
I asked him the two questions I needed to ask.
"Are you at peace with God through this? Not saying this is the end, it's not, but… all this! A lot to take in." He shook his head No. I told him it took me two weeks to get there and he slept through most of it, so that's okay.
(And then the nurse had to check on something, so there was a pause.)
Then I asked him, "Do you trust he is still the good shepherd? He is leading us where it is good for us to go." He nodded and all his angst and twitching calmed for a few minutes.
I think he's going to make it. Am I reading the signs right? Or is this just Lynn the Optimist seeing out of my lavender glasses still? (Let me keep my glasses on for a while. lol)
M
Hi Lynn,
I'm still thinking about you both and praying for you.
You might find yourself having a mix of positive and negative days.
Some of that may purely be due to the emotional turmoil within you.
Fix your eyes on Jesus, I know that is easier said than done when there
are so many things going through your mind. Can I suggest something
which will help. Keep a prayer diary and make a note of every answered
prayer no matter how big or small, even if it does not involve John
directly.
Read it often to remind yourself what God is doing, you will be amazed
at just how much God is working on your behalf. His plans and timing are
perfect.
I'm still thinking about you both and praying for you.
You might find yourself having a mix of positive and negative days.
Some of that may purely be due to the emotional turmoil within you.
Fix your eyes on Jesus, I know that is easier said than done when there
are so many things going through your mind. Can I suggest something
which will help. Keep a prayer diary and make a note of every answered
prayer no matter how big or small, even if it does not involve John
directly.
Read it often to remind yourself what God is doing, you will be amazed
at just how much God is working on your behalf. His plans and timing are
perfect.
Been so busy today just now really paying any attention to CC but email had an update from Lynn so posting that for you now.
Lynn
I figured out why I should call before visiting John -- because I spent 1.5 hours waiting around for doctors and nurses to change lines and other I-don't-know stuff. Apparently, he hasn't had some of his lines changed since they were put in at the VA hospital two weeks ago. (This is bad? I figured so much stuff was going on and he was so precarious, they didn't want to chance it.) And, because some of those lines go directly into his neck, they sedated him more than usual. (The X-ray technician and a nurse put the plate under him, moved him around, suctioned him out, and then pulled the plate out again, without him even crunching his eyebrows -- his standard "what are you doing to me" face if he's semi-awake.)
Part of the reason why all that happened was because there was a clog in the dialysis machine, which cranked up his fever level. I got a glimpse of him before I was scooted out, and he had a damp cloth on his forehead -- a sure sign he had a fever.
So, good news and bad news, but the good news is so good, the bad news wasn't hard to take.
Good news -- his white blood count is down to 20. (Still aiming for 8-10, but after going all the way up to dangerous levels -- 46, when 40 is terrible -- 20 is so very good.) I'm thrilled!
Bad news -- didn't get off the ventilator. My optimistic side pictured him actually thrilled with hospital Jell-O and talking, but since he slept through the visit anyway, I can hold off hope on that one.
I did ask the nurse if nurses were allowed to lie to patients. The lie I want told? Eagles creamed the Patriots. lol
Lynn
I figured out why I should call before visiting John -- because I spent 1.5 hours waiting around for doctors and nurses to change lines and other I-don't-know stuff. Apparently, he hasn't had some of his lines changed since they were put in at the VA hospital two weeks ago. (This is bad? I figured so much stuff was going on and he was so precarious, they didn't want to chance it.) And, because some of those lines go directly into his neck, they sedated him more than usual. (The X-ray technician and a nurse put the plate under him, moved him around, suctioned him out, and then pulled the plate out again, without him even crunching his eyebrows -- his standard "what are you doing to me" face if he's semi-awake.)
Part of the reason why all that happened was because there was a clog in the dialysis machine, which cranked up his fever level. I got a glimpse of him before I was scooted out, and he had a damp cloth on his forehead -- a sure sign he had a fever.
So, good news and bad news, but the good news is so good, the bad news wasn't hard to take.
Good news -- his white blood count is down to 20. (Still aiming for 8-10, but after going all the way up to dangerous levels -- 46, when 40 is terrible -- 20 is so very good.) I'm thrilled!
Bad news -- didn't get off the ventilator. My optimistic side pictured him actually thrilled with hospital Jell-O and talking, but since he slept through the visit anyway, I can hold off hope on that one.
I did ask the nurse if nurses were allowed to lie to patients. The lie I want told? Eagles creamed the Patriots. lol
Not a very good day myself but email check has this update from Lynn..
Lynn
~The only reason John sometimes hasn't had a temperature is because his dialysis machine helps to lower the body's temperature, plus the staff works tirelessly to cool him off. Add to that, his white blood cell count went up to 22 today, so the doctor decided it was time to CT scan his whole body to try to find the cause.
Pneumonia.
They also found a blood clot in his leg, so he's back on heparin.
Meanwhile, I couldn't see him today because I hit a wall. I rolled over in my sleep at 5:30 this morning and a wave of dizziness woke me up. A weird kind of dizzy -- like my room tilted 45 degrees. It did go away even before I brushed my teeth, but I'm glad there is a railing between my bedroom and the bathroom because I would have stuck on the right wall. (Like the house was still tilted that much.)
I was nervous driving for fear it would hit again, so didn't. Since I went to bed at 1 AM, I was hoping I could go back to sleep sometime today. I can't seem to relax. I used to be very good at it. It's to the point I'll walk into the kitchen before realizing I had no need to walk into the kitchen.
Finally that nap came along, but it was 4:15, and John' nurse wanted me to call her at five to find out how the CT scan went. I was in bed trying to sleep in ten minutes, but, sure enough, a neighbor banged something big fifteen minutes later. (Something like tossing an empty paint can into an empty plastic trashcan from 10 feet away.) I rolled over and the dizzy hit again. It's two hours later. Most of it is gone, but it still sometimes feels like I'm going to careen to my right at any given moment. I don't know which I want less - to find out I'm coming down with a flu or it keeps coming and going so I can't see John.
Lynn
~The only reason John sometimes hasn't had a temperature is because his dialysis machine helps to lower the body's temperature, plus the staff works tirelessly to cool him off. Add to that, his white blood cell count went up to 22 today, so the doctor decided it was time to CT scan his whole body to try to find the cause.
Pneumonia.
They also found a blood clot in his leg, so he's back on heparin.
Meanwhile, I couldn't see him today because I hit a wall. I rolled over in my sleep at 5:30 this morning and a wave of dizziness woke me up. A weird kind of dizzy -- like my room tilted 45 degrees. It did go away even before I brushed my teeth, but I'm glad there is a railing between my bedroom and the bathroom because I would have stuck on the right wall. (Like the house was still tilted that much.)
I was nervous driving for fear it would hit again, so didn't. Since I went to bed at 1 AM, I was hoping I could go back to sleep sometime today. I can't seem to relax. I used to be very good at it. It's to the point I'll walk into the kitchen before realizing I had no need to walk into the kitchen.
Finally that nap came along, but it was 4:15, and John' nurse wanted me to call her at five to find out how the CT scan went. I was in bed trying to sleep in ten minutes, but, sure enough, a neighbor banged something big fifteen minutes later. (Something like tossing an empty paint can into an empty plastic trashcan from 10 feet away.) I rolled over and the dizzy hit again. It's two hours later. Most of it is gone, but it still sometimes feels like I'm going to careen to my right at any given moment. I don't know which I want less - to find out I'm coming down with a flu or it keeps coming and going so I can't see John.