Betrayed

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J

J-Kay-2

Guest
#21
I just don't see how people can still be nice in that way if it's only going to make people do the same thing over and over. That's all. It sounds to me you're feeling like I was attacking your comment when really it didn't take that long for me to see some things on here that makes me think that it's just a pass for the husband to continue to do it. I don't think it's right.
I am sorry for misunderstanding. I ask for your forgiveness. God bless ~ J~K~2
 
J

J-Kay-2

Guest
#22
Here is the thing. The Lord has continuously within this last year had put it in my heart that the truth was still being with held from me. Periodically he had done this to not let me hurt all at once. But slowly so that I could deal with the pain slowly. Had he given to me all at once I would be in a mental institution. Just got done speaking with my pastor about newly discovered actions in all 10 affairs that my husband admits out of anger because he had been caught. I'm instructed and very much feel the need to tell yet another good friend that my husband slept with his wife. He and my husband are why we were good friends. He deserves to know, the same as I did when nobody told me. It is a healing process. I am not out to wreck their marriage, she and my husband did that themselves. My husband and many others did these things not me. Since I called the last husband it has brought a small piece of comfort to me. I cannot forgive someone who claims to have changed n lives for the Lord knowing that they are still continuing to live with lies. I'm beginning to think he is a very good con artist. But god knows:)

Devastated, I won't be making any more comments on this. I hope I can
convey what I see happening, and the Word I gave you, well..... I would
rather err on the side of being right, than being wrong. Either I heard
from God one night, for you, and the next night it was my scripture devotion.
Coincidence ? No, not with God. That is not my place to instruct you and
I am leaving what was given to me and since you don't agree or believe it
is from Him, I understand. I told you to pray over it, and obviously you did
and you got your answer contrary to what I felt. That is good for you to do.
Always test the spirit that is claiming God gives someone a Word for them.
I am that someone and obviously I missed it.

I am going to tell you what I see has happened based on what is posted here.
I see lives destroyed by telling innocent people their mate was unfaithful to
them. Often times people have done things in their past and person was sorrowful
for it and was forgiven by God and the marriage stayed intact. That is called
revenge. Scripture says "Vengeance is mine saith the Lord, I will repay." However,
you feel better after having done what you did. I can't help but wonder what did
it make the innocent people feel like. Am I misunderstanding you when you said
you were told to tell the mates ? I don't know.. Yes it is sad what happened to you.
Obviously I have come into a chat topic that was not meant for me to offer advice.
I am sorry you have been hurt. I ask forgiveness for hurting you with my advice,
but the Scriptures, still stay the same. They are the Word of God. I pray the best
for you in your future.
 
J

JustAnotherUser

Guest
#23
I am sorry for misunderstanding. I ask for your forgiveness. God bless ~ J~K~2

There's no need. If anyone's acting like a jerk it's me. :(

Hope all is good. I'll leave this alone and put it past as well.
 
J

ji

Guest
#24
There is alot to my story. I will try to make it as short as possible. I am a Cancer survivor of 7 years. The year before I found out I lost my father. Here it is 8 years later and last year on the date of my father's anniversary date I found out my husband of 18 years was having an affair. Thinking that was it I also found out that he had had several affairs through our entire 18 years of marriage. Recently I was in a car accident and fractured my pelvic bone in 2 places and am confined to a wheel chair. There are at least 3 women in my neighborhood that my husband had been with along with 2 women who we were good friends with them and their husbands. 1 of those women he was with in my own backyard. So every where I turn I am reminded of the pain by his decisions. I am a Christian and am finding it difficult to focus on the good things that God had given me. My husband had changed his ways and is a Christian also. However he was baptized at the time he was having an affair. I'm at the point where I can't live with him nor can i without him. It's hard to be positive when I am filed with tremendous pain and grief. Betrayal and disloyalty. God forgive me but I can't forgive them or like them for what they have done to me and my kids. I also hope he forgives me for wishing that pain will come to them. They all knew what they were doing and who I was. I have never ever been unfaithful to my husband. I know i will never get an answer why when that's pretty much all I want.
"If we believe not, yet he abideth faithful: he cannot deny himself." 2 Timothy 2:13 KJV.
Jesus is Lord God and He is full of Mercy and Grace.His Tender Care and Love never dries out.He is the Everlasting Father.Although i am not married,i had terrible losses in my family and its somewhat like your past.Trouble after Trouble in every step i take.This is the situation that every Child of God face.Its happening because we Love God more than this world.
i know its not good at times to see the Light..i have had terrible times,still at times going through..

Dear,Please read this with Patience.:)

Jesus lived a sinless life and because He was Obedient to God the Father for fully accomplishing the Purpose He was sent for by YHWH(God the Father who calls everything into existence from nothing),Jesus was denied Justice for the mission He had to accomplish.So what are we in front of that sacrifice?...The Pain and Suffering a Christian goes through is not tolerated by world.we live in a compassion less world where compassionate are less.And that's why we Go to God.He never goes back on His words.

Because of Losses in my life,i tried to end my life one time and that was at a time i realized there is nothing good in me to please God.And instead of dying,i was lifted up from death by the Spirit of the Lord God Almighty.It was Supernatural.And that day God reminded me the Promise He gave to me sometime back which is
"[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea[/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif], [/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness[/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]." Isaiah 41:10 KJV.
[/FONT]

God is Love :).He will not fail you,the day you close your eyes to depart this world,you will be seeing Jesus wiping out your tears.Its a Special Privilege for a Child of God.Even if you feel like fainting in your walk with God.....lean on God,rest on His Chest.He is Love.

God will pull you through.
your Testimony sharing made me feel like there are people like me in this world looking for Compassion.so thanks for Sharing.It's us that God is going to mold so that we become what we did not receive from others,and in time God will make us share that with others who deserve it.When you become Peaceful,Pray a lot.Count Praising to God in numbers like 1000,2,000...5000 etc.
1,000 Praises will take at least 15 minutes,more you take it to 2,000 and 3,000...its a 1 hour time with God.you are making breakthroughs.you will be touched by the Holy Spirit and tears of Joy will come out then.Do it and Realize,am talking it all from experience.

Its in the midst of troubles that God's Peace Reigns Supreme.Its not easy,i know.But try...A Baby takes time to start walking.Just like that we all have our Learning times.Age doesn't matter,our heart's Desire to be with God matters and then God's Presence can be sensed in our Lives more and more which we couldn't see till then...Revive it even if sometimes we miss it due to various reasons.In time it will become like Breathing..:)

we got 24 hours a day,a time of 15 minutes to 1 hour Praying is the bets thing we do on that day.It will Bless us.

God Bless.
 
J

ji

Guest
#25
Devastated: I think you sound wise and patient in your decision to have
counseling. When God forgives, He forgets. It is not as easy for us as
humans to be that way, but we are not God. However, you know God and
you know He will give you the wisdom to deal with this situation with
dignity. I believe you are a lady, you have been hurt multiple times, but
Jesus was able to forgive us our sins and He said we must forgive 70x's7.
It sounds like you are working on it. Do you recall the old song .......
"Me And Jesus, We Got Our Own Thing Going?" that just popped in my
head. True, you and Jesus are going to work this out. If you still love
your husband and are willing to put the past behind you, I believe it
would be easier for you. You are in wheelchair. Does this mean your
intimacy is out of the question ? If so, then you might have a different
outlook on the issue as to whether he can stay faithful. I pray you
can be healed and walking again. I pray your husband will consider being
baptized again as he realizes he did not understand the seriousness of
what baptism is. You said he has come to Christ right ? You are
going to have counseling ? My prayers are with you and I believe with
God all things are possible. You can start a new loving relationship with
him if he is willing to be the husband God intends. We will pray for you.
God bless you and know you are loved by our Lord and He is watching
over you. In Christ, a sister ~ J~ Kay~ 2
God doesn't forget...if we don't turn to God and repent of our deeds in our Growth to image of Christ,we as Christians are still in danger.Its a walk in Humility before God that matters.God deeply Forgives...we cannot do that.He is Love,that's why He tolerates us and gives us time to Repent and He washes us Clean when we Go to him more and more..

God finally no more remembers the sins of Over comers who reached in Heaven to be with Him....
Which is why we should be careful in reconciliation with others who wronged us.Love them and Forgive them but don't forget the past they exhibited.Walk away from such scenarios,give them time to grow is no problem..It all depends on their changed heart...And sometimes they can teach us also..

God Bless.
 
D

devastated

Guest
#26
To everyone who has posted. I in no way did this to cause disagreements between you all. I was just trying to get good honest godly advise to what my direction should be. I now feel guilty for causing such problems among you all. My deepest apologies. To everyone. Maybe I came to a website that was not appropriate for my issues. Was just trying to find a Christian way of helping myself. To do things right by God. Also for my own self being. I do appreciate all of your words n knowledge. I know it's very easy to step back and give another advise. I'm guilty of that myself. When it comes to myself, I don't see things that clearly. I am very sorry that my post may have been inappropriate for this site. Didn't mean to cause any problems. I have enough on my plate as it is. It also saddens me that I may have affected you all. I'm sorry.
 
J

ji

Guest
#27
To everyone who has posted. I in no way did this to cause disagreements between you all. I was just trying to get good honest godly advise to what my direction should be. I now feel guilty for causing such problems among you all. My deepest apologies. To everyone. Maybe I came to a website that was not appropriate for my issues. Was just trying to find a Christian way of helping myself. To do things right by God. Also for my own self being. I do appreciate all of your words n knowledge. I know it's very easy to step back and give another advise. I'm guilty of that myself. When it comes to myself, I don't see things that clearly. I am very sorry that my post may have been inappropriate for this site. Didn't mean to cause any problems. I have enough on my plate as it is. It also saddens me that I may have affected you all. I'm sorry.
if i did say something that made you feel bad,i apologize...but Truth is Truth..
Its better to realize it as soon as you can,this site is essential if you are looking for answers,..ignore debates,yea..its ok..
But look for answers,..many don't have it..not only hear but in outside world also..
So always look for answers..:)
Jesus is Lord of Lords,King of Kings and He is the One who is going to Judge everything in the end.
And its also True that none Loves like Jesus and He wants us to Clean ourselves by the Grace of God to Eternity in Heaven.

Its not about debate or hurting words,its all about finding the way to Eternity with Jesus than going round in circles..and miseries of this world..
 
J

J-Kay-2

Guest
#28
To everyone who has posted. I in no way did this to cause disagreements between you all. I was just trying to get good honest godly advise to what my direction should be. I now feel guilty for causing such problems among you all. My deepest apologies. To everyone. Maybe I came to a website that was not appropriate for my issues. Was just trying to find a Christian way of helping myself. To do things right by God. Also for my own self being. I do appreciate all of your words n knowledge. I know it's very easy to step back and give another advise. I'm guilty of that myself. When it comes to myself, I don't see things that clearly. I am very sorry that my post may have been inappropriate for this site. Didn't mean to cause any problems. I have enough on my plate as it is. It also saddens me that I may have affected you all. I'm sorry.
What can wash away my sins ? Nothing but the Blood of Jesus. The red print made me
think of that song.
Devastated, You came to right place. You were given wise advice by others. I wish in one
way, I could take back mine, but.... honestly every thing I said about praying about your
situation and the scripture confirming what I had written you confirming what I had written
earlier, I can't take back what I know was God. I was the instrument. I could see you
glowing in my spirit mind, and see you healed and happy, not holding any hatred. It was
an image I believe Jesus gave me to share with you. He is only way to give peace to the
broken heart.

I give you permission to toss out of your minds eye what I wrote and as I said earlier,
pray and see if that came from God. I do not claim to be His spokesperson, but I do
share what I feel in my spirit when I am not looking for an answer. It simply came
and I passed it on. So.... we will assume I made an error, and I ask your forgivness
for interfering.. You see, you came to the right place. I was in wrong place obviously.

Please take the advice your sisters have given you ... there is much love there.
I wish you the very best God has to offer and may you and the Pastor get the issue
resolved the way Christ would want it.

You are loved. J~Kay~ 2
 
D

devastated

Guest
#29
I am in no way upset with anybody on here that had given advise at all. I'm just in a very confused state. I can tell you all that today is a little better. After speaking with my counselor. I guess I feel relieved in a way that I do not owe my husband a decision on what he tries to convince me that we need to move forward. After speaking with her for almost 2 hours. She explained that I am no where close to make a decision about anything. That I need to concentrate on myself. Which is going to take alot of time. I love you all and appreciate each and everyone of you. Many Blessings to you.
 

tires

Junior Member
May 2, 2014
1
0
1
#30
Dear Betrayed------ The pain you must be enduring is unbelievable and i am sure at times unbearable....i am paralyzed from the waist down and have a foot
amputated along with other peripheral infirmities associated with paralysis....I have been married 30 years to my wife...at one
time i was like your husband...i was unfaithful and full of other addictions...It was do to my addictions and unfaithfulness that i became paralyzed ( car wreck ...drunk ) I do not know how or why my wife chose to stay with me but she did...and after years of Recovery on so many fronts i am now faithful and clean and sober....it hurts so much and the strong memories of pain i caused my wife are still with me...I do not deserve the mercy and grace i received from God and my wife....but for some reason God and my wife chose to give me compassion instead of all of the other remedies for my heartless actions...Life now is growing in Grace and Mercy and acceptance for me and my wife....it really hurts to remember what I did
but again for some reason i was given so many chances and finally it worked...So I am sharing this with you just in case you
might choose to stick it out with your husband....there are stories of success....and i promise your husband will not get off the hook....but forgivenss and love does heal...even for us people who absolutely dont deserve it...May God bless you both
 
D

devastated

Guest
#31
It does help to hear from somebody who had caused the pain. I'm so very glad you are healed in your heart. My problem is. ...I don't think he realizes the depth of the pain he had caused. He constantly tries to justify what he had done. So far I have had several excuses including blaming me. Somedays out of anger he continues to hurt me with his words. It pains me terribly. He is scheduled to go to counseling next week but continues to tell me he is fixed and doesn't need it. However he does still carry the actions and characteristics of a person with an addiction. Through this last year up until Friday that I know of (until God puts it in my heart again) he continues to lie until I confront him. He had never come to me on his own with the truth. Then he gets upset that I can't see the good in him and trust him. He's learning God's Word, he's just not living by it completely. I so very much appreciate your testimony. It truly made me cry. I'm glad you choose to change for god and your wife. Many Blessings to you and your wife.
 
J

J-Kay-2

Guest
#32
Dear Betrayed------ The pain you must be enduring is unbelievable and i am sure at times unbearable....i am paralyzed from the waist down and have a foot
amputated along with other peripheral infirmities associated with paralysis....I have been married 30 years to my wife...at one
time i was like your husband...i was unfaithful and full of other addictions...It was do to my addictions and unfaithfulness that i became paralyzed ( car wreck ...drunk ) I do not know how or why my wife chose to stay with me but she did...and after years of Recovery on so many fronts i am now faithful and clean and sober....it hurts so much and the strong memories of pain i caused my wife are still with me...I do not deserve the mercy and grace i received from God and my wife....but for some reason God and my wife chose to give me compassion instead of all of the other remedies for my heartless actions...Life now is growing in Grace and Mercy and acceptance for me and my wife....it really hurts to remember what I did
but again for some reason i was given so many chances and finally it worked...So I am sharing this with you just in case you
might choose to stick it out with your husband....there are stories of success....and i promise your husband will not get off the hook....but forgivenss and love does heal...even for us people who absolutely dont deserve it...May God bless you both

Sir, that is one of the most humbling testimonies I have heard in
a long time. I felt your remorse in your words, not just the affliction.
Your gratitude for your wife and her undying love and forgiveness.
I hope someone will read this and know there is hope to reconcile
with their mate. God is so wonderfully patient with all of us in all
our ways. Thank you for stepping forward with your confession.
May all your days be blessed with love, joy, peace and happiness.