This is a great example of why I have some hatred for many religions. I too was scared out of my mind as a child because of fear of the apocolapse. That fear is used to control you. I find this very sad.
Don't worry about these things...the end won't be for a very very long time, lest there is a nucular holocaust.
Sounds like you're a casualty of modern-day-organized-religion-without-any-spirituality, Michelle. My heart goes out to you, I might feel the same way if I had been raised in the average spiritually-dead church
. But, please, although you understandably reject religion, please stay open-minded about the fact that Jesus loves you, that He died for you, and that He wants to have a relationship with you. I do not expect you to take my word for this, but I would appreciate it (when you feel ready), if you would just ask Jesus with an open heart if it is true, and He will show you Himself. Because then you will know for certain, no mind-control involved
. You seem like a very intelligent young lady, and it is good to have you on this site. But please realize that not everyone who says they're a christian is a mindless, spiritually dead dried-out shell
. I follow Jesus because He loves me, and because I realize that when you take away all the vanity of this life, He's really all there is. At some point, please, give Him the opportunity to wrap you in His love. Praying for you- Nicole <3