Joidevivre., yes dear suffering sister in Jesus., even in knowing your situation and what you are going through. We not only learn from the Bible, we also learn by the circumstances living here on earth exposes us to., and He walks through them with us as He keeps beckoning us all along the way to believe Him anyway in spite of them.
My dearest friend Barbara was shockingly diagnosed with lung cancer a few months ago. She is many times of my day my biggest reality. What she is going through, how she feels and what she struggles with., and my seeing it so closely is another challenge to my eyes and senses as I help care for her and do baths and am intimately aware of her suffering. The changes her body is showing and her breathing has totally changed.
These are real changes and they also match up with the rest of the things I've seen in my life that were impossible to refute in the face of faith in the Word. Yet I must refute them daily as I read the promises He has shown in His Word. What do these promises mean for us? How can we dare hold on to them when our lives are hurting? Did He mean for us to? Yes, I believe with all my heart He means for us to hold on to them and Him in the face of these tribulations.
Psalm 91 is an impossible chapter to hold on to today for many believers. I've read it and thought how can 1,000 fall at my side and 10,000 at my right hand and have it NOT approach me? The only answer is learning how to believe and walk by faith even in the middle of it all.
This learning takes the very personal and private walking in and through this world. And the truths about the 10 fold and the 20 fold and the 50 and 69.9 fold and the 90 fold up to the 100 fold faith and healing. It's a walk taken one step at a time personally for each one of us.
So each one of us is walking it on our own (humanly speaking) and often alone without the human strength of and even encouragement others. Yet we have to walk it because He calls us to walk it. Even if no one follows or agrees.
Psalm 91American Standard Version (ASV)
Security of him who trusts in Jehovah.
91 He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High
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a][/SUP]Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
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2 [/SUP]I will say of Jehovah, He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in whom I trust.
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3 [/SUP]For he will deliver thee from the snare of the fowler,
And from the deadly pestilence.
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4 [/SUP]He will cover thee with his pinions,
And under his wings shalt thou take refuge:
His truth is a shield and a buckler.
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5 [/SUP]Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night,
Nor for the arrow that flieth by day;
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6 [/SUP]For the pestilence that walketh in darkness,
Nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday.
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7 [/SUP]A thousand shall fall at thy side,
And ten thousand at thy right hand;
But it shall not come nigh thee.
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8 [/SUP]Only with thine eyes shalt thou behold,
And see the reward of the wicked.
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9 [/SUP][SUP][b][/SUP]For thou, O Jehovah, art my refuge!
Thou hast made the Most High thy habitation;
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10 [/SUP]There shall no evil befall thee,
Neither shall any plague come nigh thy tent.
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11 [/SUP]For he will give his angels charge over thee,
To keep thee in all thy ways.
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12 [/SUP]They shall bear thee up in their hands,
Lest thou dash thy foot against a stone.
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13 [/SUP]Thou shalt tread upon the lion and adder:
The young lion and the serpent shalt thou trample under foot.
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14 [/SUP]Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him:
I will set him on high, because he hath known my name.
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15 [/SUP]He shall call upon me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble:
I will deliver him, and honor him.
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16 [/SUP]With long life will I satisfy him,
And show him my salvation.
So like I pray for my dearest and best friend Barbara, I pray for you Jodevivre. Knowing only some of the suffering and some of the questions you also must be walking out. It overwhelms and intertwines our senses. Sometimes resting is the only way to get through the next few hours. But like you wrote here, they are for a season. Am praying for you sister.