There is a fight going on that most people don't know about or see.
This fight happens in small stages throughout your life. Sometimes you sense it, usually you don't.
You are constantly losing in this fight until you start seeking God.
Even that is not a guarantee to stop losing the fight but it is a first step in the path of Victory.
All of your answers are given in the bible. The problem is you won't understand them until you ask God to reveal them to you.
2 Corinthians 4:3-5
3 But if our gospel be hid, it is hid to them that are lost:
4 In whom the god of this world hath blinded the minds of them which believe not, lest the light of the glorious gospel of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine unto them.
5 For we preach not ourselves, but Christ Jesus the Lord; and ourselves your servants for Jesus' sake.
I tried to think what I would listen to when I was 19. It wouldn't have been much. I was pretty sure everyone was wrong. Turns out I was pretty much right. No one has all the answers but the Lord.
John 14:6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.
John 16:33 These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.