My marriage is falling apart

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Erika8520

Guest
#1
#1
I have been with my husband 10 years and this last December I found out he cheated on me, HE kicked me and the kids out of the house and we separated for 2 months we then decided to give it another shot but everything has been horrible since. It gets worse daily. He works out of town and on the weekends he turns of the phone and in the morning acts like I'm crazy and just pretends everything is ok. I'm really devestated when we decided to get back together I really thought he felt remorse and regret for destroying our family but it seems it's actually the opposite. I am so heart broken I don't know what else to do. I pray that God helps me because I can't take much more
 
trofimus

trofimus

Senior Member
#2
Aug 17, 2015
10,684
794
113
#2
Maybe try to seek help in the church you both belong to?
 
Sheepman

Sheepman

Senior Member
#3
Aug 13, 2016
135
5
0
#3
Dear christian!
Im divorced because my wife cheated on me many times.
It consumed me.
There should never be adultery in a christian home. Your husband is in the fire already if dont find a way to truly repent.
Adultery is the worst.
Its smash the heart to pieces and still the heardened world just goes on.
Its a miracle im still alive.
I have since i was young felt such disgust at cheating i waited til 30 before i married because of fear of losing
my heart. And still I did.

Satan is a stealer and destroyer from the beginning.

Marriage is more holy than most can imagine in this brainwashed era.

For now (and pardon my swinglish)
My heart goes out to everyon that goes through what you do.
Its only possible to go through it without losing the heart with Jesus from Nazareth.
He is right now in heaven interceding for you and every other beliver.

He loves you.

I have no church in this country that is following Jesus truly.
I just want to share what took me trough the insanity of adultery and
the world.
The last 6 months i listened to "Council of Time" (you can find it on youtube)
He hold a straight path and deal with everything from the gospel to the more
difficult stuff.

Chuck Misslers "Gospel of John" session on youtube is very good.

I know exactly how you feel.
You just want to cry all the time.

And with Jesus
With music
It is releasing.
And sometimes you melt to much.

So its like one has to choose to cry in its time so to speak.

Its so much more id like to say.

When it feels to bad...and I cant even read or pray etc
I say to my soul
It keeps me close to Jesus and the time is short.

Cleanse ourselves of this worlds beating.

Best regards
A fellow christian
 
Yonah

Yonah

Senior Member
#4
Oct 31, 2014
1,074
103
48
#4
the truth of the matter is that there is no greater form of betrayal between a husband and wife then adultery, and the one who commits is completely clueless as to the pain they cause their spouse and their family, nor can they, you see like any sin willfully engaged in, it blinds the heart and darkens the spiritual senses, my council to you dear sister is seek our Savior's loving embrace and pray earnestly that his eyes are opened to the enormity, and the bondage he is now in, and that he sees and feels the real pain he has caused yourself and you children, pray that he understands it was not the enemy who brought this grievous blow to his own house but his own selfishness. restoration is always possible but not commanded, be strong in our Savoir.
 
notmyown

notmyown

Senior Member
#5
May 26, 2016
4,927
1,272
113
#5
Erika8520 said:
I have been with my husband 10 years and this last December I found out he cheated on me, HE kicked me and the kids out of the house and we separated for 2 months we then decided to give it another shot but everything has been horrible since. It gets worse daily. He works out of town and on the weekends he turns of the phone and in the morning acts like I'm crazy and just pretends everything is ok. I'm really devestated when we decided to get back together I really thought he felt remorse and regret for destroying our family but it seems it's actually the opposite. I am so heart broken I don't know what else to do. I pray that God helps me because I can't take much more
Click to expand...
:( i'm so sorry.

perhaps we could ask a mod to move this to the family forum?
in hope you'll get more responses there.

i will pray for you. ♥
 
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MyaView

Guest
#6
#6
I'm pretty sure I'm not alone when I say that if there's one lesson in life that God tries to teach us all is that you can not put your faith in another human being. They will disappoint you every single time. There comes a time in everyone's lives where God will most likely make you feel like you're all alone in the world and HE is the only one who can help you....and it's true! Rely on him first. Put him first in your life and all of the rest will fall into place where it should be.
 
resurrection33

resurrection33

Banned
#8
Dec 19, 2009
27,513
128
0
71
#8
Erika8520 said:
I have been with my husband 10 years and this last December I found out he cheated on me, HE kicked me and the kids out of the house and we separated for 2 months we then decided to give it another shot but everything has been horrible since. It gets worse daily. He works out of town and on the weekends he turns of the phone and in the morning acts like I'm crazy and just pretends everything is ok. I'm really devestated when we decided to get back together I really thought he felt remorse and regret for destroying our family but it seems it's actually the opposite. I am so heart broken I don't know what else to do. I pray that God helps me because I can't take much more
Click to expand...
If he's had sexual relations with another woman since marrying you, you are free to divorce him or separate from him.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#9
#9
Erika8520 said:
I have been with my husband 10 years and this last December I found out he cheated on me, HE kicked me and the kids out of the house and we separated for 2 months we then decided to give it another shot but everything has been horrible since. It gets worse daily. He works out of town and on the weekends he turns of the phone and in the morning acts like I'm crazy and just pretends everything is ok. I'm really devestated when we decided to get back together I really thought he felt remorse and regret for destroying our family but it seems it's actually the opposite. I am so heart broken I don't know what else to do. I pray that God helps me because I can't take much more
Click to expand...
The most common mistake people make in a separation is going back too soon. It's easy to fake remorse for a short time, to get your way. For separation to be truly effective there needs to be requirements of what needs to be done before you even Talk about getting back together (counseling, proof of genuine remorse and effort of change, etc) and patience. Sounds like that may be the case here. Sorry. )=
 
O

oldethennew

Banned
#10
Feb 28, 2016
11,311
2,973
113
#10
I truly believe if a God ordained/blessed marriage is God's reality, then nothing that satan can do will be
able to destroy it...
 
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simplifiedtruth

Banned
#11
May 28, 2016
537
3
0
#11
resurrection33 said:
If he's had sexual relations with another woman since marrying you, you are free to divorce him or separate from him.
Click to expand...
That statement is not generally true tho. Adultery can only happen when a man lays with another mans wife.
 
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Ariel82

Guest
#12
#12
Will pray that you find a way to support and care for yourself and your children
 
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simplifiedtruth

Banned
#14
May 28, 2016
537
3
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#14
MyaView said:
LOL! Are you a polygamist or something?!
Click to expand...
I know God is. And Abraham, Jacob, Moses, David and others in the bible. I know Jesus was born from a polygamist family.
I also know the law of God sanction it and regulates it, and even commands it if your brother dies and has not raised seed.
I also know polygamy has always been a custom biblically and that the bible does not condemn it or say it is a sin a single time. I know polygamy is also mentioned in prophecy when there comes a time where 7 women are gonna take hold of 1 man.
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#15
#15
simplifiedtruth said:
I know God is. And Abraham, Jacob, Moses, David and others in the bible. I know Jesus was born from a polygamist family.
I also know the law of God sanction it and regulates it, and even commands it if your brother dies and has not raised seed.
I also know polygamy has always been a custom biblically and that the bible does not condemn it or say it is a sin a single time. I know polygamy is also mentioned in prophecy when there comes a time where 7 women are gonna take hold of 1 man.
Click to expand...
Old testament examples....new testament promotes monogamy from both men and women...just read the requirements to being a deacon or bishop...husband to ONE wife.

Also the Bible reminds men to go back to their first love and the wife of their youth.

Jesus was descended from Leah not Rachel or the maidservants, just to note that though the Bible allows pologomy in the Old testament, that doesn't mean God approved of it.
 
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simplifiedtruth

Banned
#16
May 28, 2016
537
3
0
#16
Ariel82 said:
Old testament examples....new testament promotes monogamy from both men and women...just read the requirements to being a deacon or bishop...husband to ONE wife.

Also the Bible reminds men to go back to their first love and the wife of their youth.

Jesus was descended from Leah not Rachel or the maidservants, just to note that though the Bible allows pologomy in the Old testament, that doesn't mean God approved of it.
Click to expand...
Have you looked behind the word "one" in the NT ? Also God does not change. God allows polygamy and it is even commanded. He also told David, if you would have want more wives, I would have given you. (Btw he had a bunch).
 
Fenner

Fenner

Senior Member
#17
Jan 26, 2013
7,507
111
0
#17
To the original poster, I'm so sorry. It really bothers me that he threw you AND your children out of the house. I can't fathom any decent person allowing their children to be homeless. That selfish behavior right there shows what type of person he is.

I would get your self situated with a job, etc and find a way out. I know that it's not easy but it sure is better than spending your life with a selfish jerk.

I'm sorry to sound harsh. God bless you.
 
Sheepman

Sheepman

Senior Member
#18
Aug 13, 2016
135
5
0
#18
Because of your hardened hearts God allowed it. Jesus said it. You are in deep water my scandinavian friend.

Adam had one wife.
He fell.

Jesus is the new Adam.
If you approve polygami its not compatibke with the new covenant that should soften your heart towards other
hearts.

To grow in Jesus will never be possible while at the same time polluting his commandments.
So..mention one in our covenant that descended into polygami.

Silence

Paul even commended full time service of the Lord in this age of grace. But not many is able to do it.
You know it is really a freedom to know we can now through Jesus go back to the wonderful special love directed to one woman/man as a unity loving the Master in the garden.

And as said above.

Dont even think about having a role as pastor and the like if you live lije that.

Im sorry but its the truth.

When it says 7 to 1 it doesnt say they should marry. Only whats the predicament.
The sad watering down of the males in this end of days where testosteron has become synonymous with evil.

God is also a warrior.
The second coming wont be mercy to those not holding on to his commandments. And even worse for those who promote unscriptual selfish motives.

But..polygami IS compatible with worlds strange version of LOVE.

Its a lunewarm all inclusive mist. Bohemian groove would love it. Dull care.
 
S

simplifiedtruth

Banned
#19
May 28, 2016
537
3
0
#19
Sheepman said:
Because of your hardened hearts God allowed it. Jesus said it. You are in deep water my scandinavian friend.

Adam had one wife.
He fell.

Jesus is the new Adam.
If you approve polygami its not compatibke with the new covenant that should soften your heart towards other
hearts.

To grow in Jesus will never be possible while at the same time polluting his commandments.
So..mention one in our covenant that descended into polygami.

Silence

Paul even commended full time service of the Lord in this age of grace. But not many is able to do it.
You know it is really a freedom to know we can now through Jesus go back to the wonderful special love directed to one woman/man as a unity loving the Master in the garden.

And as said above.

Dont even think about having a role as pastor and the like if you live lije that.

Im sorry but its the truth.

When it says 7 to 1 it doesnt say they should marry. Only whats the predicament.
The sad watering down of the males in this end of days where testosteron has become synonymous with evil.

God is also a warrior.
The second coming wont be mercy to those not holding on to his commandments. And even worse for those who promote unscriptual selfish motives.

But..polygami IS compatible with worlds strange version of LOVE.

Its a lunewarm all inclusive mist. Bohemian groove would love it. Dull care.
Click to expand...
You are entitled to your own opinion, but not to your own fact. Nothing that you just said condemns polygamy and neither does the bible, not once. The fact remains, polygamy is biblical and not condemned, not once. You are valuing your own opinion above the Word of God. Or you don't know and assume that what I said is not there. What would you say to people from such nations and cultures where people live polygamous lifestyles ? Would you tell them they are sinning and should divorce ? Your opinion comes from a western and roman way of thinking about marriage. Let God be true and every man a liar.

This discussion should be in another thread.
 
Maynard

Maynard

Banned
#20
Jan 17, 2013
612
19
18
#20
FIND A MARRIAGE COUNSELOR

Erika8520 said:
I have been with my husband 10 years and this last December I found out he cheated on me, HE kicked me and the kids out of the house and we separated for 2 months we then decided to give it another shot but everything has been horrible since. It gets worse daily. He works out of town and on the weekends he turns of the phone and in the morning acts like I'm crazy and just pretends everything is ok. I'm really devestated when we decided to get back together I really thought he felt remorse and regret for destroying our family but it seems it's actually the opposite. I am so heart broken I don't know what else to do. I pray that God helps me because I can't take much more
Click to expand...
Go to marriage counseling with your husband, Erika, not the internet for advice regarding your situation. People here really know nothing of what's actually going on in your relationship with your husband. You are not doing yourself, your husband, your children, nor your marriage any favors at all by coming here for advice regarding your marriage in crisis. People have already given you some potentially destructive advice, and like most discussions here on CC chat it has already degenerated into biting.

Seek out a qualified marriage counselor, Erika. You can go to a counselor by yourself too to talk about it. You can simply google and find many in your area.

Be careful. Pray.
Best wishes. God bless.
 
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