Doubting

llen · Apr 18, 2013

Hey,
I'm looking for some help. I'm 21, and I was raised in a Christian home. I remember questioning God at about 9 and asking Mum if He was definitely real and she said it was impossible that He wasn't (which I know isn't true, and never really believed) and these doubts continued until I was 15 or so. I then trusted a few good Christian friends, and chatted through things, and I guess got over stuff a bit then. I have never had assurance of my Salvation, and to be honest have never felt like I believed in Jesus quite enough. I have no recollection of really becoming a Christian. However, from I was 16 I really felt like I trusted in God, I felt like I was relying on Him, I was even praying about going to the mission field after I graduate.

Then about 3 weeks ago, like a light turning off, I felt the doubts come back. It feels like they are smothering me, I feel like I am drowning. I am doubting everything. It started with my salvation - but now it's God's existence, whether I really believe in Jesus - if I believe enough. I don't feel like I can believe anything I think, I don't know how I even feel. I'm worried there might be something mentally wrong with me too, like depression or anxiety. I want people to pray for me, and I think I know that if I turned away from all this I would be wrong. I know I wasn't working hard enough on my relationship with God beforehand, but I don't know how to function at the minute. I am constantly reading, praying, trying to get back to normal. I don't feel anything at the minute, I don't even see sin in my own life. I am falling apart. I need God so much, I need Jesus. I know that. But I don't know how to believe.

I'm supposed to be going away for three months this summer, in like a month, and I'm terrified of going away feeling like this. I don't want to go to the mission field if I'm not even sure I have God.

Blain · Apr 18, 2013

Doubt, fear, unbelief, anxiety, these are all things from the devil not god. It seems to me you are being attacked by the devil to question if god is real and to question your faith. You say you do not see any sin in your own life? this may be because deep down you know you are washed by the blood of the lamb. I think you will find the answers and peace you seek on here and if you continue to ask the lord for help. He always comes to the aid of those who cry out to him without hesitation:]

dashadow · Apr 18, 2013

In our walk with God it's important to have Christian brothers and sisters walking with us. We are all challenged at times. Some of us are challenged much more than others. But God and His Love manifested by Christ and those who love Him will see you through. Praying God will lift you up, protect you and guide you.

llen · Apr 18, 2013

Thank you so much, both of you. I really do feel like it is the devil, making me doubt my salvation, and my God. How would you recommend dealing with that? I really feel like he's tempting me to try praying to him, and trying to get me to call him lord - which I would never do! My church doesn't really talk a lot about the devil, so I don't really know how to deal with it...

Blain · Apr 18, 2013

Yes the devil will try to make you do these things, I have to go to work but i want to leave you with. Use the word of god as a weapon against him. Rebuke him the name Of Jesus christ. The lords name makes even the devil tremble with fear. Scripture will not only save you from the devil but will make you a very powerful vessel of the lord. There is a fire that is in all of us that the devil knows if it burn with the love, passion and trust in the lord. He cannot stand against us. Let the fire burn!!!

Duckies · Apr 18, 2013

Hi llen,

As many have mentioned there is always something trying to tell us that God is not real, and a lot of it starts with doubt within ourselves. I too while being a Christian for so long was once tested on my faith, i knew God existed but i felt it in me, that sensation of well i don't feel anything. So i put my Lord to the test (not in an evil way), just something that i would know, simple and straight (very detailed on when, and how), after that it is really up to you how to see things when you have your answer.

I have yet to see him not answer me, sometimes we do ask for silly things which we already know the answer to, and God knows this too for he knows your heart. In your case, not saying this is "It", but you want to let the holy spirit flow through you so that you may find your peace, and sometimes looking for him and asking him to be there is just what we need and what he is been waiting for you to ask.

Through him you been saved, and believe me he is there, i seen a life be saved when it should have died (and that was just the start of things i have witnessed him do).

God Bless You!! ^_^ and don't lose faith, for he will never lose His for You!

Porthos · Apr 18, 2013

llen said:

Does God believe in you? Yea. You don't need faith in this outward creature that you aspire to look at, this idea that you hold, this action where you cling mentally to the notion that He's 'out there', you need faith that you're a compassionate human being and that having compassion means that you know God better than most people ever will!!

God is in you, love. God is in you. God is in the kiss on a baby's forehead, and the blades of grass that sweep in the wind, and the moment a father cries a tear of joy at his newborn. He's in the last fifty pence you give to a stranger and the night you sat up with your friend while she cried on your shoulder. He's in the smell of a home-cooked meal and the taste of a glass of wine with family, and he's in the warmth of your mother's hugs.

Don't doubt that. that's like doubting yourself; the creation God made inch by inch, sewn like a blanket to be wrapped round the needy and the oppressed. That's you. And God knows you inside out!

Don't doubt you ..... God didn't.

RedTent · Apr 18, 2013

I think God handles this differently for each different person. For me, the idea that our world just happened didn't make any kind of sense. That is how God handled it with Job. He said to look at the world He created and how He runs it. For instance, who can create and operate the stars.

When I studied the meaning of the seven feasts God gave the Hebrews to tell of His plan for us, it really made me bless God.

The sermon on the mount gives such a picture of how God is working with us today.

If you don't get all caught up in the kind of thinking we learned from the Greeks, in having to know why and when and how step by step, the way God created the world in the first place just makes for awe. God is short on detail in Genesis when He tells us about that, but all the important things we have to know is there.

It makes only the world understood by people who only know of the fleshly side of things, not the spiritual realm, seem pretty dumb.

zone · Apr 18, 2013

llen said:

take comfort in His Wisdom and power.
you don't have to be brave all the time,
don't hide your doubts and fears from those who love you.
share your burdens, the Lord's people will help you carry them.

try to see your Father's Love and Glory in creation.

notice the little things. and the big things

i don't know where you are going on missions.
maybe it's you who will be ministered to there

sometimes it works that way.

go back to the basics - His creation - including you - and stand there on what you know to be true.
rebuild your faith from there. keep it simple.

Peace to you in the Lord Jesus Christ,
zone

crossnote · Apr 18, 2013

I noticed you mentioned 'I' or 'my/me' over 50 times in your OP. Also you mentioned at least twice and implied even more 'not having enough faith'.

Faith is a matter in what or better who you are trusting and in this case even faith as little as a mustard seed is sufficient for it is not a matter of our great faith but rather our great God.

Secondly with faith, it is a turning from I/me/my (as in my salvation) to Jesus Christ and Him crucified for my sins (His Salvation). There comes a time(s) in our walk where we are broken and reduced to 'God, save me' as did Peter when started to sink in the sea when he saw the storm rather than Jesus.

And Peter answered him, "Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water." He said, "Come." So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, "Lord, save me." Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, "O you of little faith, why did you doubt?"
(Mat 14:28-31)

pickles · Apr 19, 2013

Scripture says " count it as pure joy when such times come upon you, for it is such that perfects one's faith.

Do not see this as a time of doubts, but as God perfecting faith in you.
These are such that bring the steadfast faith that is unwaivering, and the joy of salvation.
I have found praise is an exellent tool against any doubt.
Praying for you and all that is the joy of salvation and the delight of the love of Jesus.

God bless
pickles

hutchie · Apr 19, 2013

A man of great means began to build a house for himself. When he began his work the time and the weather was favorable, as the project continued there was much dispute among the community and as the season changed many storms and winds opposed the construction of his house. Eventually the house was built and it became one of the most beautiful homes in his community. The key to this builders success was determination and the most important element was that his foundation was prepared on Christ the Chief Cornerstone.

PeteWaldo · Apr 19, 2013

llen said:

Not long after I was saved, I felt Satan trying to reclaim me, in part because I was still unrepentant from alcohol consumption. Once I realized what was happening I was terrified and it just struck me to shout right out loud "Satan I can't wait to see Jesus throw you in that lake of fire!!!!" and I was immediately released, and have not been bothered by the enemy ever since.
Brother Ellis who has had considerable experience in delivering folks from unclean spirits and demons posted a good thread with a prayer of renunciation:
http://christianchat.com/bible-discussion-forum/61157-prayer-renunciation.html

llen said:

You need to read scripture more. Also consider fulfilled bible prophecy. Like for example where I copy and pasted this verse from: "My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?"
PSALMS 22

Let alone stunning reality:
http://christianchat.com/bible-disc...-historicism-bible-prophecy-2.html#post980172

llen said:

Where are you supposed to go and with what kind of a group, if any?
(I'm more of the opinion that African Christians need to come and begin mission work in western churches!)

loveme1 · Apr 19, 2013

Cry out for Him during this time.

llen · Apr 19, 2013

Thank you all. I do think I'm relying too much on my self, but how do you change that? I'm still really worried I'm not a Christian, that I never was, but I don't think I could become one for the first time now because I'm doubting so much.

It all seems too simple, too easy. Salvation seems like something it is too easy for us to get - but I guess that's grace?

maxwel · Apr 19, 2013

Before a mission trip, it's common for a lot of weird things to start happening.

I'm sure plenty of people here will be happy to discuss all of these things, including the disbelief, and the depression.

Please feel free to message me anytime, for discussion or prayer.

impact360 · Apr 20, 2013

that was a really beautiful reply zone.
so true, if we will just take a moment and look at God's creation, just get away and enjoy it we can see His handiwork right before our eyes.
Take courage Ilen you are not alone, even after a very vibrant relationship with the Lord I came under demonic attack at a dark time in my life and had the thoughts that there is no God and that I must be crazy to believe in a God. And I wasn't feeling the Lord's presence at the time either, so I was very depressed and discouraged, but I determined to reject those lies, I looked back over my life and thought on all the times that God had delivered me and ministered to me and loved me, and I knew in the depths of my being that there was indeed a God and that I am His child. It may seem crazy to think that someone with such a intimate relationship with God could even think such a thing, but it was because of the hard time that I was going through, Satan doesn't play fair, he kicks us when we're down, he was putting those thoughts into my mind, and I had to reject them in Jesus name, I spoke out loud that I know that God is real, that satan is a liar and commanded that lying demon to leave, and it did. Things are much better now, and the Lord is doing lots of stuff in my life. Yes go on that missions trip you might just find God there

or better yet He will find you

Just think of it this way, do you think satan wants you to go on that trip, perhaps that's why you are under such attack right now. Stand up against those lies and go trusting God that He will help you, Jesus said, "Apart from me you can do nothing!" and Paul said, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!" So if you feel inadequate, that's great!!! Then God can use you, because if you thought you were all that, you might not get used then. God is looking for willing vessels, not qualified, it's the Holy Spirit that qualifies you to be used, not your abilities or skills or talents or knowledge, because Jesus fills you with His life and that life will flow out of you to others, He can fill your mouth with wisdom and insight for a person that you don't even know, but God knows them. All you have to do is make yourself available to Him. God bless you and may you have a wonderful missions trip and may God use you mightily for His glory!!!!! Amen

hattiebod · Apr 20, 2013

llen said:

Doubting is quite normal!! but we need to stamp on it!!

of course you have questions, you always will I hope because we have a 'living & growing' faith. Best thing to do is share with someone who you trust and is (at this time, as we all go through our valleys

strong in the Lord. Take your doubts to God, draw close...often when we feel like this the time we spend in prayer & worship, reading scripture slips...so make a effort, even if you do not feel like it, to stay with it. Listen to some teachings on the subject? look up scriptures on this? and most of all, know you are safe with Him who loves you, you are a precious child of God and He longs to comfort you through this. God Bless you!! <><

zone · Apr 20, 2013

llen said:

remember God's Promises of salvation are wholly centered on what Christ has done.
while we were yet sinners; weak, Christ died for the ungodly.

remember your baptism.

don't make these say anything other than what they say.

just see the Promises. they are God's promises.

Mark 16:16
Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned.

Acts 2:38
Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.

Acts 22:16
And now what are you waiting for? Get up, be baptized and wash your sins away, calling on his name.'

Romans 6
1What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? 2By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? 3Or don’t you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.

Galatians 3
26So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, 27for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. 28There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. 29If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham’s seed, and heirs according to the promise.

psychomom · Apr 20, 2013

Ephesians 1

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ,

4 just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before Him. In love

5 He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will,

6 to the praise of the glory of His grace, which He freely bestowed on us in the Beloved.

7 In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace,

8 which He lavished upon us. In all wisdom and insight

9 He made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His kind intention which He purposed in Him

10 with a view to an administration suitable to the fulness of the times, that is, the summing up of all things in Christ, things in the heavens and things upon the earth. In Him

11 also we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to His purpose who works all things after the counsel of His will,

12 to the end that we who were the first to hope in Christ should be to the praise of His glory.

13 In Him, you also, after listening to the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation—having also believed, you were sealed in Him with the Holy Spirit of promise,

14 who is given as a pledge of our inheritance, with a view to the redemption of God’s own possession, to the praise of His glory.

15 For this reason I too, having heard of the faith in the Lord Jesus which exists among you, and your love for all the saints,

16 do not cease giving thanks for you, while making mention of you in my prayers;

17 that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you a spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of Him.

18 I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened, so that you may know what is the hope of His calling, what are the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saints,

19 and what is the surpassing greatness of His power toward us who believe. These are in accordance with the working of the strength of His might

20 which He brought about in Christ, when He raised Him from the dead, and seated Him at His right hand in the heavenly places,

21 far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and every name that is named, not only in this age, but also in the one to come.

22 And He put all things in subjection under His feet, and gave Him as head over all things to the church,

23 which is His body, the fulness of Him who fills all in all. (NASB)

Praying the simple beauty and certainty of God's Word reaches you.
And praying vs 18-19 for you. ♥
-ellie

Doubting

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