I feel my lack of understanding on subjects of the incorruptible seed. And why I keep sinning might be a hindrance to my belief and acceptance.
Its almost like each time I read something new in the bible, I get the same feeling I had when I was baptised, which is unsure.
When I was baptised I had no knowledge of faith grace The fathers will and very little knowledge of Jesus, Adam and Eve.
I didn't even know Grace means an unmerited favour from God.
I Just kinda went along with what others where saying. But a big part of me wanted to believe.
I feel perhaps my heart as been examined and maybe my belief was not pure enough to recieve the new seed, or maybe it has
I'm puzzled I cant find any scripture that says God breaths life into each new born baby. I've found scripture that says God breathed a living soul into Adam.
I'm assuming this means Flesh can not give birth to spirit.
I'm glad that you're so tenacious in trying to understand and get to know God - I'm sorry that you're so troubled and feel confused.
You say "maybe my belief was not pure enough"... well, I can assure you that none of our faith/belief is pure enough to please God. Also, you seem focused on the "seed" issue...? Remember that Jesus said, "“If you had faith like a grain of mustard seed, you could say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it would obey you. (Lk. 17:6)
Jesus also spoke about coming to Him as little children... little children don't have PhD's in Theology... and you don't need that either.
He works with us right where we're at... most of the time that's a place of being utterly hopeless, "poor in spirit"... that means a poverty of any spiritual understanding.
I'd encourage you to stop trying to understand/know/be intellectual about anything other than Jesus saves us when we call out to Him... that a Scriptural fact! It's doesn't require anything more. Just hold on to the belief that Jesus wasn't lying when He said:
Rev. 3:20 Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.
Matt. 7:7-11 “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!
Luke 11:9 And I tell you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.
Psalms 34:18 The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
Put your faith in Jesus being believable... trust that He's good to His word.
Quit relying on you.