Free Will thread, Hiz and Blain

[Magenta]

So beautifully stated, Stunnedbygrace, I especially liked this line:

But it pleased Him to show His son to me.

I went to see a movie many years ago on the life of Christ, it was around Easter/Resurrection Sunday, I was by no means a believer, but I was curious about Jesus, maybe felt drawn, and it was at that time that I experienced an infilling of God's love for me, accompanied by an impartation of His complete knowledge of who I was and how I had come to the broken place in life I was, and His forgiveness for me, for all the mistakes and wrong turns I had taken, and the mess I had made of my life. I have made reference to this several times since joining here It is part of my testimony #279

I have a slightly different understanding because of the way I have experienced God, even while I was still running from Him in disobedience, rebellion, and defiance. I consider myself to have been lost at that time from my present perspective, but God knew exactly where I was. This was quite a few years ago, twenty seven to be more exact. My marriage had broken down following two first-trimester miscarriages, and a still birth that occurred less than two weeks before the nuptials. I also had a lot of baggage from my past that I had been unable to deal with/put "closure" on. It was around Passover in 1988, and a neighborhood evangelical Christian church was showing a movie on the life of Christ based on the Gospel of Luke. I had been brought up in a fairly strict religious environment but did not know Jesus, and was curious, and living in a world of unremitting emotional pain, so I went. As I sat in that church after seeing the first or second part of that movie, I am not sure at what point the following happened: my whole body was filled with the Light of God's unconditional love and forgiveness for me and all I had done, all the ways I had messed up my life, all my failures and mistakes, all of it bathed in the Light of His absolute understanding of how and why I had become the person I was, all of it bathed in the Light of His unconditional love and total forgiveness. I tell you, I wept. I felt so broken and so lost and so unredeemable, but most of all I felt unworthy. And of course I am unworthy.

Even after that, oh yes, it was a cherished experience, but even after that I did not believe in "that" God. I had begun a spiritual seeking phase, and carried on in that for another fifteen years until God clearly called me out of what I was doing. And yes, even after that, even after that clear calling out, my stiff-necked stubbornness was so set against Him it took another year following the calling out for me to surrender my life to Him.

 

[Stunnedbygrace]

Do you know why you especially liked that line??
It is the NLT version of a verse in Galatians: and it pleased Him to show me His Son. I don't always remember what book something is in but I sure do remember what book that one's in because it hit me so hard when I read it.

I think how He drew us and how it happened does slightly alter how we view certain things. And none of us is done having our minds renewed and haven't learned His mind in all things yet, so there are bound to be things we see a little differently.
One of my big things lately has been to accept tensions between verses and just ask Him to explain it to me. I used to just ignore verses that seemed to be in tension to other verses that I loved, but now I accept the tension and wait for Him to pull it together. Most arguments I see are picking one side of that rope or the other and trying to yank it so there is no tension by just ignoring the other end of the rope. I try not to do that anymore.

 

[reneweddaybyday]

God has given every man the same measure of faith.

Romans 12:3 For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.


God has chosen the foolishness of preaching to save them that are lost:

1 Corinthians 1:21 For after that in the wisdom of God the world by wisdom knew not God, it pleased God by the foolishness of preaching to save them that believe.


Faith by hearing the word of God:

Romans 10:17 So then faith cometh by hearing and hearing by the word of God.


Those who do not come to faith are those who restrain or hinder the truth in unrighteousness (Rom 1:18) when they hear the word of God. Because they restrain, the Word does not reach the heart where God can bring the increase (1 Cor 3:7).

Those who do come to faith are those who do not restrain or hinder the truth in unrighteousness when they hear the word of God. As a result, the Word of God trickles down into their heart and God brings the increase (1 Cor 3:7).


Since it is God Who gave faith to all men and women and since it is God who gives the increase, then it is God Who is deserving of all praise, worship, and adoration for having designed such a magnificent gift for all mankind. Those who do not come to faith are given the same gift. They just do not accept God's gift.


Here is a different example:

When I see a beautiful sunset, I thank God for having created the heaven and the earth to provide the sunset and I thank God for giving me eyes to enjoy the beauty of the sunset.

It is God Who created that which results in the beautiful sunset.

It is God Who gave sight to my eyes to enjoy the beautiful sunset.


Same concept with faith. God made faith a part of all men and women. We either partake of that which He has given to us or we do not.

None can blame God for not coming to faith. He has given all we need to find Him.

None can boast for coming to faith because it is God Who gave all we need to find Him.

 

[Magenta]

Yes, I know why I like that line: it shows me the love of the Father through the sacrifice of the Son sent for the express purpose of rescuing us from the life of sin we were living, to bring us into His promises through the covenant written in the righteous blood of the spotless Lamb of God whose book of life our names have not been blotted out of... everything is made possible through Jesus Christ. It is awesome and amazing and almost defies description but for the fact we have the Bible explaining it all, closed to all but those with eyes to see and ears to hear. I too see both sides of the arguments at times and the little twists and turns that cause the misunderstandings and think you show an astounding amount of patience in attempting to bring clarity to the thought processes of others

 

[eternally-gratefull]

eg,

it seems as if you are going in circles...Jesus' Love and gifts are not to be in debate here,
we must respect other's point of view for where they are and what they have experienced, which
will most likely always be different than our very own...

it's never to be a defense or fight of who is right or who is wrong, but to discern who LOVES our Saviour,
no matter how they have arrived at this blessed life-time event...

for us, we always take great joy in the precious fact that others Love and Respect their
heavenly Father, this always takes precedence above all else and we would always choose
to rejoice in our shared LOVE than to argue in our own defense of what we have experienced
or believe as we grow and run our race...

I am not judging her, I am trying to say what I believe that is all

 

[Stunnedbygrace]

Yes, I know why I like that line: it shows me the love of the Father through the sacrifice of the Son sent for the express purpose of rescuing us from the life of sin we were living, to bring us into His promises through the covenant written in the righteous blood of the spotless Lamb of God whose book of life our names have not been blotted out of... everything is made possible through Jesus Christ.

And I especially like this line!
It has made me weep profusely. Happy tears.

 

[Stunnedbygrace]

I am not judging her, I am trying to say what I believe that is all

I think we are doing a good job of bearing with each other in love. I felt you became a little impatient with me but I didn't think you were judging me.

I think I DO understand what you believe. There are always those verses in tension though that He has to fit together for us. Until then we just walk by the light we have and enjoy one another because it's good to have so many brothers and sisters.
You guys just ravish my heart sometimes when I see my Lord in you. Magenta made me cry and I can't stop it now...

 

[Magenta]

And I especially like this line!
It has made me weep profusely. Happy tears.

Much in this thread has brought me to the verge of such happy tears, to know the love God has for us and how fortunate we are -no matter what else happens- to know such, and to realize too that we were created for such, to be loved by Him, and to love Him in return for the amazing gifts of life and love. There is nothing better, though sharing it is a close second

 

[Crustyone]

We are triune. Self will makes no sense to me. We have 3 wills at any time that can battle. Spirit, soul, body. We are free to choose which we follow

I think Romans chapter seven disputes the three wills idea. John only mentions two, warring against each other. Romans 7:21-25 [FONT=&quot]21 So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]22 For in my inner being I delight in God’s law;[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]23 but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]24 What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]25 Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!

[/FONT]There is the spiritual righteous mind and the bodily carnal mind.

 

[garee]

I think a free will is a will that was created in man before the fall. This would be the kind of will to do the commandments of God, led by the Spirit of Christ, and perform it .Man upright failed and it brought death by corruption and separation from God .

Man made perfect created with a subjective will, subjected it to his own conscience/heart that God designed to be against doing the will of another. Rather than to do the good pleasure of God’s will, man did the will of the father of lies, learning by experiencing to do the will of another, he died and was ejected out of the garden which was used temporally to represent the kingdom of God not of this world .The kingdom to come.

God knew that before He created man as to what was in them. He also in that way knows the thoughts and intents of our hearts. And is why He has created in us a new spirit and heart in those who have been born again that now therefore willing can do the desires of the Faithful Creator .Christ, in the Son of man is our example

Joh 4:34 Jesus saith unto them, My meat is to do the will of him that sent me, and to finish his work.

For it is God who works to both will and do His good pleasure. Free will for a Christian is to do the will of our father and finish it. he is our confidence if he has begun the good work of salvation in us we can be assured he will finish it working in us.

It is like the Son of man said when men wanted to make His flesh which he said could not profit, that which is good.

Christ as the holy Spirit of God in the person of the Son of man said” only God "not seen" is good. The Holy Spirit, Christ defines what is good and what is not. By that which he creates.Again if we believe God it is because he has created that new heart and spirit that will never die. We put no confidence in the flesh but rather walk by the Spirit of Christ that dwells in the believer.

Philippians 1:6 Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:

 

[Stunnedbygrace]

Faith is a gift of God.. God did the work.

Abraham believed God and it was accredited to him as righteousness.

It was Abrahams faith, He trusted in the work of God.

I read back through the thread as I often do, to make sure I didn't miss anything, and sure enough, I did miss something.
(By the way, good morning EG!)
The first sentence (to my mind), wars with the last sentence here...to say "faith is a gift of God" but to then say "it was Abrahams faith" seem to be saying opposite things.

But also, as I slept, I realized that my experience AFTER I met God has been that I use the faith He gave me every day. Whenever I make a choice to prefer the contempt of the world (and it comes most furiously from my mother) rather than refuse what God has said instead. This is many times and many ways, such as not worrying, even though I don't have a 401k and being laughed at or chided when I do something other than what they would, or HOW they would, because I;ve gotten a nudge by the Spirit.

The most recent example of this was just about two weeks ago. I haven't had a job in a long time, except for one small one that pays me 70.00 every two weeks. I am strong and able-bodied, and have done everything I know to find a job, becoming increasingly more humble in what I would be willing to do as time went on, but even the hamburger places I've applied to wouldn't hire me. When I met God, I made 500.00 a day for the work I did. After I met Him, when the economy tanked, my work dried up because it was...specialty work that only people with disposable income wanted. But with the economy, they held off on frivolous items just as people of more meager means did.

All the time, my mom would come home with different applications, which I filled out to make her happy, but at a certain point, I realized that this was not normal that I couldn't find a person on earth to hire me for even very simple and menial jobs. So while I filled out the applications as mom wished, and took them in, I knew I wasn't going to get a job. I knew this was Gods' hand, even though I didn't understand why. The whole story would prove to you that it had to be Gods' hand preventing, but it's too long to tell.

So I told God I was just going to wait for some direction from Him and told Him I KNEW He wasn't going to let me starve to death. I told Him I saw that I was on a donkey and was kicking it for so long but now realized that I was doing wrong and was going to wait and stop striving.

A short time later, someone suggested that I go to a certain place and talk to them about the work I know how to do (the work I used to get 500.00 a day for.) The Holy Spirit washed over me very suddenly, which is how I know that something being said is true, or that I should go a certain direction. So I immediately said, yes! I'm going to go there!

I prepared a door with an example of my work on it and the next day got ready to go. My mom stopped me and said I was going unprepared. She thought I should gather pictures of the other examples of my work and do more samples and thought she should go with me because she thinks I don't do a good example of "selling myself" and I have to admit that, according to the way everyone seems to "pad their resume", which to me, means to exaggerate and lie, she is right.

So I didn't go, and listened to her. But that night, I realized what had happened. God told me to go and I let her make me become fearful that I needed more preparation than just an example of what I do for them to see. I was led to begin looking at myself and my insufficiencies instead of just promptly obeying the Spirit. So I told her I was going to go with just the one sample, the next morning.

As I lay in bed, I thought, I shouldn't have looked at my own deficiencies or become fearful that I would mess it up and not get any work, because God told me to go. AND, I didn't even know that it would lead to work, for all I know, it was only a test of obedience and nothing whatsoever would come of it as far as work, but that something else very different would occur because of my going. None of my thoughts or speculations really mattered at all. Only obedience to the Spirits nudge mattered.

As I was leaving the showrooms of this business, right by the front door on the wall (in a regular secular business) was a wall hanging for sale, because in addition to being a custom cabinet place, they sell some home decorations and offer design help. It was woven with different colored threads and had writing stitched on. It said, as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. It was 40.00. I wanted to buy it because it just made me laugh and laugh, but I couldn't buy it because I don't have 40.00.

So I failed, but then He led me right and I realized where I went wrong, and I did eventually just listen to the Spirit and reject any fears. So...all that was just to say that, while I truly believe my faith was and is a gift and not something I was born with, I do now have a choice to use it every day to overcome my flesh, the devil and the world, or to waste it by being overcome and failing to use it. And yet, it would never, never grow without testings such as the one I described, which are Gods' working to grow me and prepare me for the weight of more and more of His glory.

So I can see one thinking it is their faith instead of a gift from God. And I think that as they grow more and more, they will begin to see it is a gift and that God then carefully grows it. But it takes walking in it, failing, being shown where you failed, getting up and going on, etc., to grow it.

Mom is very perturbed with me though that I told them they could charge 500.00 or more a day for my work and I would be happy with giving them half of it. Oh, she is soo perturbed!

 

[Crustyone]

We all have free will even before we are saved. When I was a kid In was told not eat the crayon as I was curious as to what it tasted like now pause here and consider what is going on in my mind. I was told not to eat to it I could have chosen to listen but my curiosity got the best of me and I took a bit only to spit it out in disgust.

This is free will the ability to choose. Now if we are going into the will of the mind flesh and the spirit we have consider that the mind is what controls the body and thus controls the flesh but the heart is what controls the spirit or rather the spirit we live act and speak by.
Normally we live according to our own will the fleshly will we act on what we think what we like what we hate and what we love the human will is separate from the will of God it is the polar opposite. The will of God however resides in the heart of the person and opposes what the fleshes will wants in every way.

Everyday our fee will is being used by both God and satan, the rules is they can only influence our free will they whisper to us what do and what not to do exactly like the cartoon angel and devil on your right and left shoulder you see in cartoons.
The thing is because of free will ones destiny is never set in stone, It was not always guaranteed that I would come to Christ it was a decision I had to make for myself.

You start out right, but you end sentence is incorrect, I think. We have free will, but God knows what all of our decisions will be and what all of our situations will be, so knowing that, He knows what we will do, hence He knows what we are destined to do. I suspect that He put our particular type of personality in the situation necessary to bring about the desired result. He made the situation and we chose the outcome, the one He knew we would choose.

 

[Stephen63]

God does not change. He states in His Word:

Psalm 102:25-27 "Of old You founded the earth, And the heavens are the work of Your hands. "Even they will perish, but You endure; And all of them will wear out like a garment; Like clothing You will change them and they will be changed. "But You are the same, And Your years will not come to an end.

Psalm 33:11 The counsel of the LORD stands forever, The plans of His heart from generation to generation.

Hebrews 6: 17 In the same way God, desiring even more to show to the heirs of the promise the unchangeableness of His purpose, interposed with an oath,

James 1:17 Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.

Hebrews 13:8 Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

Since we established the fact that God doesn't change, and that Christ was crucified in the mind of God from the foundation of he world, we should be able to understand that since man had free will in the beginning & thru the old covenant, God didn't change it in the New Covenant, which was established on better promises. God didn't change that, man's belief system only said He did.

 

[HisHolly]

I think Romans chapter seven disputes the three wills idea. John only mentions two, warring against each other. Romans 7:21-25 [FONT=&quot]21 So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]22 For in my inner being I delight in God’s law;[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]23 but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]24 What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]25 Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!

[/FONT]There is the spiritual righteous mind and the bodily carnal mind.

Feel free. I don't mind bc I know how I mean it.
Anyone who truly wants an answer I'll give it but I'm not interested in the nit picking that goes on. bc too many think too high of themselves. HS can guide, ask Him.. revelation is available.
I'm satisfied in my response

 

[Grace777x70]

I agree that God does not change in His character and purposes for us and they are clearly revealed in Christ. Truth and perception of that truth is progressive in it's nature from the Old Testament to the New Testament.

Our "perception" of God does change however from the Old Covenant to the New Covenant. Jesus said that no one knew the Father. In the OT people knew Him as "God" but Jesus came to reveal Him as "Father" to us. John 17:6

This is a whole new paradigm shift to man-kind and it was either a blessing to some people or a stumbling block to the self-righteous. Jesus is the exact representation of the nature of the Father it says in Hebrews 1:1-2

Jesus is perfect theology.

If we want to see how the Father views sinners - look to how Jesus interacted with them.

If we want to see how the Father views self-righteous religious people - look to Jesus and His interactions with the Pharisees.

If we want to see the Father's will towards sickness and disease - see what Jesus did as He came to fulfill the will of God. Jesus said that it was the Father in Him doing His works.

If you want to see how the Father disciplines His children - look to see how Jesus dealt with the disciples.

There is a "now" word of God to us. Isaac was happy that his dad - Abraham listened to the "now" word of God to him concerning the slaying of Isaac.

Abraham could have said " Bless God, the word of God stands forever so I'm going to slay my son. The word of God is to be "obeyed" and there should be no compromise".

Old Abraham would have been "dead wrong" ( pardon the pun ). The knowing of God for who He and the Lord Jesus Christ for who they truly are is a progressive understanding which only comes by the revelation of the Holy Spirit to us.

We are completely dependent on the Holy Spirit to reveal Christ to us ( which He is the exact representation of the Father ) as Mary was dependent on the Holy Spirit to conceive Jesus in her womb.

It is God who is at work in us both "to will" and "to do" of His good pleasure. Phil. 2:13. He gives us both the desire and the capability to do His will for our own good.

 

[FreeNChrist]

Does everyone agree that man has been given the freedom to choose??

 

[PeterJens]

Free will is a difficult subject because it also covers the idea of perception.
If you do not perceive something or are aware of it you cannot respond to it.

There is a brain disorder where people loose the ability to see both halves of an object,
but are not aware they are only peceiving half of it.

So free will is only possible in a true sense when you are pure and redeemed because otherwise
you are a slave to the thing you wish to have freedom or choice over.

It means though we have free will, we follow our understanding and inclinations that lead us to
sin and rebellion.

We do not know what makes us sheep, or people Jesus calls. In the parables we are the people
He found in the streets who were invited, and we responded. Amen.

 

[eternally-gratefull]

I read back through the thread as I often do, to make sure I didn't miss anything, and sure enough, I did miss something.
(By the way, good morning EG!)
The first sentence (to my mind), wars with the last sentence here...to say "faith is a gift of God" but to then say "it was Abrahams faith" seem to be saying opposite things.

If Abraham did the work, Then yes, I would agree, But Abraham trusted that God would do the work. Ie, God gift, was the work in which Abraham could trust in.

But also, as I slept, I realized that my experience AFTER I met God has been that I use the faith He gave me every day. Whenever I make a choice to prefer the contempt of the world (and it comes most furiously from my mother) rather than refuse what God has said instead. This is many times and many ways, such as not worrying, even though I don't have a 401k and being laughed at or chided when I do something other than what they would, or HOW they would, because I;ve gotten a nudge by the Spirit.

The most recent example of this was just about two weeks ago. I haven't had a job in a long time, except for one small one that pays me 70.00 every two weeks. I am strong and able-bodied, and have done everything I know to find a job, becoming increasingly more humble in what I would be willing to do as time went on, but even the hamburger places I've applied to wouldn't hire me. When I met God, I made 500.00 a day for the work I did. After I met Him, when the economy tanked, my work dried up because it was...specialty work that only people with disposable income wanted. But with the economy, they held off on frivolous items just as people of more meager means did.

All the time, my mom would come home with different applications, which I filled out to make her happy, but at a certain point, I realized that this was not normal that I couldn't find a person on earth to hire me for even very simple and menial jobs. So while I filled out the applications as mom wished, and took them in, I knew I wasn't going to get a job. I knew this was Gods' hand, even though I didn't understand why. The whole story would prove to you that it had to be Gods' hand preventing, but it's too long to tell.

So I told God I was just going to wait for some direction from Him and told Him I KNEW He wasn't going to let me starve to death. I told Him I saw that I was on a donkey and was kicking it for so long but now realized that I was doing wrong and was going to wait and stop striving.

A short time later, someone suggested that I go to a certain place and talk to them about the work I know how to do (the work I used to get 500.00 a day for.) The Holy Spirit washed over me very suddenly, which is how I know that something being said is true, or that I should go a certain direction. So I immediately said, yes! I'm going to go there!

I prepared a door with an example of my work on it and the next day got ready to go. My mom stopped me and said I was going unprepared. She thought I should gather pictures of the other examples of my work and do more samples and thought she should go with me because she thinks I don't do a good example of "selling myself" and I have to admit that, according to the way everyone seems to "pad their resume", which to me, means to exaggerate and lie, she is right.

So I didn't go, and listened to her. But that night, I realized what had happened. God told me to go and I let her make me become fearful that I needed more preparation than just an example of what I do for them to see. I was led to begin looking at myself and my insufficiencies instead of just promptly obeying the Spirit. So I told her I was going to go with just the one sample, the next morning.

As I lay in bed, I thought, I shouldn't have looked at my own deficiencies or become fearful that I would mess it up and not get any work, because God told me to go. AND, I didn't even know that it would lead to work, for all I know, it was only a test of obedience and nothing whatsoever would come of it as far as work, but that something else very different would occur because of my going. None of my thoughts or speculations really mattered at all. Only obedience to the Spirits nudge mattered.

As I was leaving the showrooms of this business, right by the front door on the wall (in a regular secular business) was a wall hanging for sale, because in addition to being a custom cabinet place, they sell some home decorations and offer design help. It was woven with different colored threads and had writing stitched on. It said, as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. It was 40.00. I wanted to buy it because it just made me laugh and laugh, but I couldn't buy it because I don't have 40.00.

So I failed, but then He led me right and I realized where I went wrong, and I did eventually just listen to the Spirit and reject any fears. So...all that was just to say that, while I truly believe my faith was and is a gift and not something I was born with, I do now have a choice to use it every day to overcome my flesh, the devil and the world, or to waste it by being overcome and failing to use it. And yet, it would never, never grow without testings such as the one I described, which are Gods' working to grow me and prepare me for the weight of more and more of His glory.

So I can see one thinking it is their faith instead of a gift from God. And I think that as they grow more and more, they will begin to see it is a gift and that God then carefully grows it. But it takes walking in it, failing, being shown where you failed, getting up and going on, etc., to grow it.

Mom is very perturbed with me though that I told them they could charge 500.00 or more a day for my work and I would be happy with giving them half of it. Oh, she is soo perturbed!

God grows our faith by being faithful. Our faith fails when we lack faith in God. It is still our faith, It is still Gods work..

It is faith in self that is foolishness, Because we fail How many times do we take control when things go good (lets be honest)

I was hoping to get past this, This is a non essential topic that gets my emotions stired.. and it scares me to go to far into it.

p.s. Good morning. Sorry was so late to get back to you sis

 

[FreeNChrist]

Does everyone agree that man has been given the freedom to choose??

Guess not, eh??

 

[Stunnedbygrace]

If Abraham did the work, Then yes, I would agree, But Abraham trusted that God would do the work. Ie, God gift, was the work in which Abraham could trust in.




God grows our faith by being faithful. Our faith fails when we lack faith in God. It is still our faith, It is still Gods work..

It is faith in self that is foolishness, Because we fail How many times do we take control when things go good (lets be honest)

I was hoping to get past this, This is a non essential topic that gets my emotions stired.. and it scares me to go to far into it.

p.s. Good morning. Sorry was so late to get back to you sis

If it gets bad emotions or impatience stirred, then it is best to keep away from it until such a time as you can remain calm and peaceful to speak with your brothers about it. Have a good day, EG!