Matthew 7:20- "Therefore by
their fruits you will know them."
Melvainyo first I want to say that based on your posts, I do not think you are a "stereotypically strict, hyper-religious person who can't tolerate a dance" . I agree that a lot of modern dance is exceptionally sensual in nature, and does not represent a Christlike or godly nature. Thats just a fact and for a Christian to argue that fact would make me question where their heart stood and therefore not put much weight on their opinion... sadly. And I applaud you for recognizing that this type of use of our bodies is not appropriate and does not glorify God, and for not being afraid to stand up and express your concerns.
That being said, the church I attend does have a monthly "Friday Night Live" that caters to a younger, more hip crowd, and sometimes features Hip Hop and rock style music with Christian lyrics, in addition to praise and worship music and sermons. I know the youth enjoy these special events and I have witnessed powerful moves of God at these events. The church next door features a youth dance team where they choreograph dances to popular Christian music, using some modern dance techniques, but it is never even remotely sexual in any way.
So my point is, it is possible to utilize more modern means as a form of appealing to a more diverse group of people, without becoming ungodly or wordly. The Bible clearly lays out the ways we should act as Christians, and if anything we do comprimises us in any way, it shouldn't be done.
Galatians 5:19-26 is great scripture that you can easily test your actions against to see if they are in line with the spirit and not the flesh.
16 I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh.
17 For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish.
18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law.
19 Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery,
[c] fornication, uncleanness, lewdness,
20 idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies,
21 envy, murders,
[d] drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told
you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.
24 And those
who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.
26 Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.
I would say that anything truly done in the spirit would not be wrong, but those things done in the flesh should be avoided. There are many "rules" that have been passed down from generation to generation, and the "abstain from the appearance of evil" scripture has been used to enforce those rules, but upon further study of the Word it is found that those things are not actual sinful. So just be careful in simply judging all behaviors, and base everything on godliness!
And don't let anyone chastise you for your convictions if they clearly do not align with true godliness!!!