I have to admit I did cringe a bit when you wrote that you were screaming at God. God DOES understand what you're going through, and that's why He helped you.
But don't go overboard with the screaming at or to God thing. There has to be respect and reverence toward Him because He is God and
He has already done and sacrificed so much for you out of great love for you.
Keep in mind that the Lord has placed a lot of value on you - He won't overlook you:
Matthew 6:25 “
Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?"
But you have to have your priorities in the right order:
Matthew 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
If you focus on the Lord and keep Him first in your life, He'll take care of everything else you need!
So here's the proper way to present your requests to God. It's really simple:
Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
So this verse says to:
- Present your requests with a grateful heart. Recall to yourself all the past wonderful things He's done for you and give thanks for them.
- Trust God - lay all your problems at His feet. Then wait patiently for Him to help or provide for you according to His will. He might not answer you the way you would want Him to, but He will always come through no matter what.
I hope this helps!