A
Im new here. Im desperate for answers. I've been brought to my knees.
Ive spent that last 12 years of my life drinking, partying and jumping from BAD boyfriend to BAD boyfriend. I was raised by a single mother and my father was never around due to drugs/alcohol.
I've been in heavy therapy for two months now. I'm told that I have extreme low self esteem and attachment issues.
I am in a relationship with a really wonderful man for 13 months which is what brought me to the therapy. I realize I want to be with him and only him. The anxiety set in 3 months into the relationship.
When I met him I stopped drinking and I stopped going out. I didn't feel like it was a lifestyle I wanted anymore. Now I feel empty because that's what "filled my cup" for so long.
Being in a relationship with this amazing man I find myself being anxious from the time I wake up to the time I go to sleep. I have this heavy aching feeling in my throat and in my chest. It makes me cry a lot. When I am with him I constantly feel like I should end it because of the way my body is reacting. It's very hard to control.
I have a hard time being away from him. I also have a very hard time sharing his attention with others. I get jealous and irritable. For example I would have a really hard time going somewhere with him and his friends because I would be sitting there judging those people and than comparing myself to the other girls in the group. It's so ridiculous how childish I can be. I don't exhibit any of this behavior in front of him. Instead I have anxiety attacks.
New Years Eve he received a text from a woman that I know is 100% his friend. She wished him Happy New Years and said Love you! I was standing next to him when I saw this text and I got so angry that I walked out of the place.
I hate that I am this way. It is making me absolutely miserable. I have always struggled with this in all my relationships. I don't want to lose this man, he has been so patient with me for over a year now. He still wants to stand by me.
I guess my question is, is where do I begin in helping to feel more secure with myself so that I can feel secure with my boyfriend who I love dearly.
Ive spent that last 12 years of my life drinking, partying and jumping from BAD boyfriend to BAD boyfriend. I was raised by a single mother and my father was never around due to drugs/alcohol.
I've been in heavy therapy for two months now. I'm told that I have extreme low self esteem and attachment issues.
I am in a relationship with a really wonderful man for 13 months which is what brought me to the therapy. I realize I want to be with him and only him. The anxiety set in 3 months into the relationship.
When I met him I stopped drinking and I stopped going out. I didn't feel like it was a lifestyle I wanted anymore. Now I feel empty because that's what "filled my cup" for so long.
Being in a relationship with this amazing man I find myself being anxious from the time I wake up to the time I go to sleep. I have this heavy aching feeling in my throat and in my chest. It makes me cry a lot. When I am with him I constantly feel like I should end it because of the way my body is reacting. It's very hard to control.
I have a hard time being away from him. I also have a very hard time sharing his attention with others. I get jealous and irritable. For example I would have a really hard time going somewhere with him and his friends because I would be sitting there judging those people and than comparing myself to the other girls in the group. It's so ridiculous how childish I can be. I don't exhibit any of this behavior in front of him. Instead I have anxiety attacks.
New Years Eve he received a text from a woman that I know is 100% his friend. She wished him Happy New Years and said Love you! I was standing next to him when I saw this text and I got so angry that I walked out of the place.
I hate that I am this way. It is making me absolutely miserable. I have always struggled with this in all my relationships. I don't want to lose this man, he has been so patient with me for over a year now. He still wants to stand by me.
I guess my question is, is where do I begin in helping to feel more secure with myself so that I can feel secure with my boyfriend who I love dearly.