Withdrawels from DXM

So here we go. Instead of giving in I'm going to type it out.
The first impulse is to eat.
Second impulse is to look at pornography.
Third impulse is to try and find a wife.
Fourth impulse is to satisfy myself in some way.
Then. Blackness in my stomach.
I have to wait to find a wife.
Why?
Because I'm incredibly shallow.
But the girls I find attractive aren't attracted to me.
Then I will have no one.

This is the pain in my stomach I was talking about.
This is the whole reason I took DXM.

I just need to check my ego and lower my standards.
My face is a trainwreckk and I'm overweight.
And I've made some girls very uncomfortable.
Thankfully the drug that did this is out of my system.
I'll just have to carry this around, but it's my fault for thinking too highly of myself.

It surely is easier to just take a pill than to put on Christ! Christ can't live in the same body with sin, and cleaning it of sin is not easy. It is the honestly with ourselves that is the hardest. Also, knowing that Christ cleansing is as solid as the bottle of pills, and accepting the cleansing.

The thing is, the pills don't really work, and Christ really and truly does. It is even good through our death, it lasts for eternity.