21 year marriage over?

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ngosi

Guest
#21
#21
I am in the game and honestly it is very easy to solve a problem together no matter how big if you are in 'reasoning together' mode, for the bible says the Lord says, 'come lets reason together'. Its a terrible thing when the devil hits your reasoning with God himself and with the somebody you want to reason with. This comes through one having 1) pride, 2)Envy 3) Jealous 4) Tradition 5) Laziness in prayer 6)Unforgiveness, bitterness and pride 7) Anger. 8)Fear
We fail when we go into something without asking of God even when we know Him and thats what many did in their relations. Not all women are wives and not all men are husbands or at least not yours- the bone of your bones and the flesh of your flesh.sometimes and without fear of contradiction we have other peoples wives and and they have other peoples husbands, the the children are yours'. Pray and overcome in Jesus name.
 
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Patiences

Guest
#22
#22
I couldn't believe when I read your post of your 21 year marriage being over, I am going through the same thing with a 21 year marriage ending and not being my choice. I have been separated for 2 months and not contacting my husband at all. We are both Christians and I have watched him fall away in the months before our separation. I remain faithful and asking God to take over the situation and letting His will be done. It's so hard not knowing what the end results will be but I do know that God will bless me and make my life better than ever. Praying things will work out for you too.
 
O

OFM

Guest
#23
#23
praying for u on ur marriges being over..........
 
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JerryJones

Guest
#24
#24
Unless she has committed adultery, you are not Biblically permitted to divorce her and even then, that is a last resort type thing. It is awful, that you must suffer so much with her, but keep at it. Keep trying to work on the marriage with her. Perhaps you could attempt some sort of surprisingly, passionate manner of expressing your love towards her; as women tend to be emotional creatures and thus this may subsequently appeal to her. Keep in mind than women are often much more sensitive and easily offended. That is to be feminine is to show weakness and therefore remember this when dealing with her. (assuming you don't already)
 
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marianna

Guest
#25
#25
If someone is abusive and has abandoned you, which your wife has, divorce is allowed.
I do not know which church you go to, but if what you have posted is the truth, your pastor will probably agree.
If I were in that situation I would divorce and have good times with the kids (who are not any happier in an abusive, loveless home with both parents miserable - they learn to model this again, another generation), and I would hope for someone to share all that love with.
God Bless you.
I hope for someone who will love and care for you, someone who truly knows the Lord.
marianna.
 
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sonofmax

Junior Member
#26
Oct 14, 2012
7
0
0
#26
Try to understand her side of the Marriage two books that helped me understand what my wife was going through during my Marriage was(for men only )and (for women only) i read both they helped me understand her and my emotions as well please don't choice the easy option fight for her make her know shes worth it !! Keep fighting for your Marriage .It's not better on the other side of Divorce trust me on that its a lot worse .And always remember REAL MEN PRAY ON THEIR KNEES !!!
 
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sonofmax

Junior Member
#27
Oct 14, 2012
7
0
0
#27
also I made the Mistake of trying to fix the Marriage MYSELF on my own strength and only afterwards when things cleared did i realize my mistake of not committing it to Gods strength because through him all things are possible. Please just learn about how to love her the action not the feeling emotion but the selfless act of love Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. will be praying for you and thank you for sharing, because as i have read these posts its helped me understand more of my situation as well .
 
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myheart

Guest
#28
#28
Amen, you really spoke the truth. God Bless you, I pray this helps him.
 
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myheart

Guest
#29
#29
Amen, I have prayed that prayer, your will be done Father
 
D

Delaine

Guest
#30
#30
WOW! I have been separated from my husband of 14 years for 9 months. I moved out in July and started the divorce proceedings with in the last month or so. In all honesty I was unequally yolked from day one. I choose after multiple counselors (couples & individual) over a 3-4 year span to make a positive change in my life and in the lives of my children, unfortunately that change meant ending my marriage. I struggle daily financially, but I took a leap of faith leaving, and I have stayed afloat. Since moving out I have lost weight, gone off anxiety and depression medications and have essentially become healthier and happier (not that I don't have rough days or stress). I surround myself with positive people, church going Christians, my children's activities, and I am actively pursuing a support group (either locally or on line) ... I am getting healthy on ALL levels now ... and it feels GREAT!
 
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kessy001

Guest
#31
#31
it is well with you and your home. seek Godly counsel, focus on doing it God's way and you would not be put to shame. As tough as it is, i believe there is still hope for your marriage. so i pray that the peace of God that passes all understanding guides your heart and mind through Christ Jesus .Amen. be strong my brother it is well.
 
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jay2710

Guest
#32
#32
I'm sorry this is all new to me. I'm recently divorced. Is there no compassion for those that are divorced? Are we the only ones condemded to hell. WOW
 
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photocrazee

Guest
#33
#33
Wow, good to know someone understands what I am going through. Except I've been married for nearly 16 years. I was 20, he was 25. We have two children ages 11 and 14. He has an internet porn addiction that we have struggled with for at least 12 years of our marriage. I feel like I am riding a roller coaster and I just want to get off the ride. I have finally accepted that its his sin and its between him and God. I am not his mother and I can't police him every minute. I can't trust him, he proves that to me every 6 months or so. He gets counseling from our pastor and does well for a few months, then falls back into porn and so the cycle continues. I feel so hurt. I have never done anything to cause him to distrust me. I've only supported him and stood by him for nearly 16 years. But I am so tired. My kids are tired of seeing Mommy cry. I believe I've forgiven 70X7.
 
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shekaniah

Guest
#34
#34
photocrazee said:
Wow, good to know someone understands what I am going through. Except I've been married for nearly 16 years. I was 20, he was 25. We have two children ages 11 and 14. He has an internet porn addiction that we have struggled with for at least 12 years of our marriage. I feel like I am riding a roller coaster and I just want to get off the ride. I have finally accepted that its his sin and its between him and God. I am not his mother and I can't police him every minute. I can't trust him, he proves that to me every 6 months or so. He gets counseling from our pastor and does well for a few months, then falls back into porn and so the cycle continues. I feel so hurt. I have never done anything to cause him to distrust me. I've only supported him and stood by him for nearly 16 years. But I am so tired. My kids are tired of seeing Mommy cry. I believe I've forgiven 70X7.
Click to expand...
You have my prayers...
You can start your own post.
You will get more prayer support that way.
Love in Jesus, Shekaniah
 
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chuinchoy

Guest
#35
#35
as human, there must be a reason why we act/behave in certain way. Studies have shown that when we act/behave in that way is the result of either what we've expereinced in the past or a sign to cry for help. You need to find out what they are and help your wife to overcome/resolve them. Before helping your wife, you should pray asking God to give you the ability and patience to go through them.

It is your responsibility to help your wife because when you married her, both of you vowed that for better or for worse, for heathy or sickness you will cherished her and till dealth do you apart. So, it is your turn now to make good this vow that both of you've made.
 
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chuinchoy

Guest
#36
#36
TO PHOTOCRAZEE

You need a professional perhaps a phychiatrist to help your husband to overcome sex addiction problem. Your church pastor can help ONLY on spiritual matters because your church pastor is not trained to do so.
 
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