Bipolar Wife

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spent

Guest
#1
#1
Hello. My wife has a mental illness (bipolar) and wants a divorce and her counselor and doctor says that she is psychotic and very ill, but she doesn't believe she is ill and will NOT take any medication. She has spent about $50k this year - buys clothing and jewelry for herself and put our 5 year old son in harms way - driving (reading iphone bible), so I got a court order and had her removed from the house and the court ordered her to see a doctor, which she did, but she did NOT follow his recommendation of taking meds. I got a mental health warrant and she is currently in the hospital, but refusing to take any meds. I believe in my wedding vows - better/worse, sickness/health, but after 9 months of this, I having nothing to give. I have spendt$15k on lawyer fees and we are in a giant financial hole. I love this woman, but if she comes out of the hospital and doesn't take meds, then I feel my only option is to divorce her. With her current psychotic state, she can't hold down a job. Anybody walk down this path before or have any advice? Thanks.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#2
#2
Not personally. But one of my closest friends was the bipolar wife. Bipolar can be very dangerous if not treated. It often leads to drug and/or alcohol abuse and all sorts of bizarre decisions. Come to think of it, another friend of mine has a husband who is bipolar as well. Though they separated due to his verbal abuse long before the bipolar became so strong.
But yes, they can be violent. My friend told me before she got her bipolar under control she tried to kill her husband. Not all have violent tendencies, but it's still a scary thing. This is a tricky situation. I don't think there is an easy answer to it. Wish i had an easy one to give you. This may be something to pray about more deeply.
 
B

brokenclay

Guest
#3
#3
Brother. I'm sorry to hear you are having this kind of a problem. Read all you can about this. You will see why you will do what you have to do. My best friend and brother in Christ has had to divorce to have a normal life. Plus he cares for 3 psychotic adult children. God bless you in all you do.
 
H

hospitalpharmacist

Guest
#4
#4
My Aunt is bipolar and I know very well the problem you are facing. She buys everything she sees in the shops and that she likes even if she is not working right now and she has diseases to treat. She spends more than she earns. We helped her and we are going to help her again because she is ill. Sometimes she has her anger outburst and in these moments there's no way: she treats badly anyone. I know that this situation can be very frustating because these persons refuse any kind of help. God is powerful and can heal anyone: just pray for her healing. I will do too.
Your family is in my mind and in my heart.
Stay strong and don't give up.
 
N

nathan3

Guest
#5
#5
spent said:
Hello. My wife has a mental illness (bipolar) and wants a divorce and her counselor and doctor says that she is psychotic and very ill, but she doesn't believe she is ill and will NOT take any medication. She has spent about $50k this year - buys clothing and jewelry for herself and put our 5 year old son in harms way - driving (reading iphone bible), so I got a court order and had her removed from the house and the court ordered her to see a doctor, which she did, but she did NOT follow his recommendation of taking meds. I got a mental health warrant and she is currently in the hospital, but refusing to take any meds. I believe in my wedding vows - better/worse, sickness/health, but after 9 months of this, I having nothing to give. I have spendt$15k on lawyer fees and we are in a giant financial hole. I love this woman, but if she comes out of the hospital and doesn't take meds, then I feel my only option is to divorce her. With her current psychotic state, she can't hold down a job. Anybody walk down this path before or have any advice? Thanks.
Click to expand...

I personally don't see buying things and using a phone while driving is bipolar. That " false medical condition " is throw around with such impunity,, it does more harm then good. . That's called wasting money and although not the best time to use a phone, many do use it driving.

She should not take medications , physiological, that are dangerous for your wife's health. Your overreacting is actually likely going to hurt your wife, and any hope of a good relationship in the future.. You know the saying, some of the worse situations are gotten into with the best intentions ..


The only problem you really defined well here, is that shes spending money. Women do that, that does not mean she needs to be put through grief for it: It sounds like you just need to put a cap on how much your wife is able to spend in a year. Marriage counseling is one thing, putting her in a hospital and trying to force her to take likely potentially dangerous drugs is another; and going on the information you provided, is a over reaction.
 
Last edited:
Angela53510

Angela53510

Senior Member
#6
Jan 24, 2011
11,782
2,951
113
#6
This sounds just like bipolar disorder to me! If your wife refuses medication and to listen to her pdoc, then I can't see anything else but to divorce her. I don't believe in divorce, but I know many bipolar women who have done exactly as your wife and ended up alone. They are sad and alone, and regret what the bipolar disorder did to their lives.

Sometimes they are craving excitement, other times their drives are beyond their control. Meds can make all the difference, but even if they force her, she is going to go off them the minute she can. It may take years for her to settle down and figure out how she has destroyed her life. In the meantime, you have to think of yourself and the children.

It is really sad, esp. if she will not acknowledge she is sick. Marriage counseling might help, but it sounds like she would not go. Praying God shows you the way through this nightmare!
 
C

cct

Banned
#7
Sep 16, 2013
1
0
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#7
Hi all praise the lord
 
J

jb800m

Guest
#8
#8
i had a wife that wanted to be bipolar and got treatment for it but was really borderlin personality disorder but either way, the only way to move forward in marriage is for her to realize she needs proper help my prayers are with you i stayed for 6 years and she controlled the marriage the whole time it was just plain horrible
 
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