Divorce and my life

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Poopsiemom

Guest
#1
#1
I am going through a divorce and lost custody of my two kids. It is because he claims I abuse my kids. Something I would never do, but yet it was my word against his and since I have a mental illness...I lost the battle. I would hope that joint custody would be awarded so we could co parent our two boys, but that didn't happen. These two boys are my whole world. I wanted these two so much and went through hard pregnancies to have them. They are truly my gift from God! I pray each night for them. But I am angry at God for taking my gifts away. I get two hours a week with them. Right now, my youngest is sick and I can't be there for him. I pray for guidance, but yet I am angry at God for taking my kids away from me. My soon to be ex-husband was verbally abusive and I stayed to protect the kids. I guess. It was not a smart idea. But I didn't believe in divorce and didn't think he would do this to me after 21 years of marriage. I tried so hard to be the good mom and wife. With my illness...it was a struggle.

I guess what I want to know is...is it ok to mad at God for this? I pray for guidance and protection for my boys and healing for my little one who is sick. I am just angry that I can't even call to check on him. I am so worried.
 
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Ugly

Guest
#2
#2
Honestly, i don't believe you do. God didn't take your kids from you, your husband did. Your husband has free will to act as he chooses and do as he wants, and that's exactly what he did, and now you're going to blame God for the actions of a free willed man?
Also, you chose to stay in abusive marriage to 'protect' the kids? By protect you mean keeping them in an environment where abuse was taking place. So that way they grow up learning abuse is normal and either to be accepted when abused, or to learn to abuse others.
I don't mean to be down on you, but some of this falls in your lap and is your responsibility. You married this man. You stayed with an abuser. These were your choices. Its not really a surprise someone mean and vindictive, such as an abuser, would use your mental illness against you to continue to mistreat you by robbing you of your children.
I'm not putting all the blame on you, your husband is the central problem here, not you. But you had choices to make that could have had things gone differently. So to blame God for the outcome of those choices is not fair.
I hope your ex eases up and you are granted time with your children again. I am sorry what has happened to you and i wish the best for you.
 
K

kenisyes

Guest
#3
#3
God has lots of people angry with Him. He can take it. He can also turn it around for you and for those kids, and even for your husband. Look at it this way, a lot of people aren't talking to Him at all; at least you are saying something. Remember this time when you see His victory in the situation.
 
S

shekaniah

Guest
#4
#4
Prayers sent for you to have wisdom and peace.
May God bring you into to balance mind, body and spirit.
In Jesus Name, Amen
 
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dmdave17

Guest
#5
#5
Dear Poopsiemom,

I am truly sorry for your situation, and I pray that your prayers will be answered in a way which eases your pain, but I feel compelled to point something out. God did not take your kids away from you. Your husband took your kids away from you. God is altogether good and holy. It is impossible for Him to do evil. However, He often allows bad things to happen for a reason. This was the whole point of the story of Job. Ultimately, Job's circumstances proved that his faith was sound, even in the most trying of circumstances. He never lost his trust in God, and in the end was rewarded amply.

I know you love your children deeply, and I do not doubt that you have been a good mother, but I would respectfully suggest that (just maybe) you could be aksing for the wrong thing in your prayers. Rather than asking God to do what you want. try asking Him to do what is best for your children. You might want to say something like, "Dear God. It would mean the world to me if my children could be restored to me, but Your will be done."

As impossible as it may seem to you right now, your best course of action is to trust God. Remember, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,..." (Romans 8:28)

God be with you in your struggle.
 
B

BarlyGurl

Guest
#6
#6
Aside from saying I am very sorry for your trial... I refrain from speaking here because I think you have already recieved very sound counsel from those before me. Be strengthened in Chirst.
 
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Matt37777

Guest
#7
#7
God didn't take the gifts away. He doesn't give and take like that all the time. Sometimes it's us, our faults that end up making us gain something or lose something. So again he didn't take the boys. If he took the boys they'd be in heaven with him. You still get to see them. Tell that to the mom who just lost her two kids in a car accident and would do anything to see them even for 2 minutes a year, let alone 2 hours a week. Things will get better don't worry. Then when they're old enough they can decide if they wan to spend more time with you. Don't worry. You now have freedome to explore life. A new lease on life. Get going! you can do anything now. Book that trip to hawaii right now okay! Go do it!
 
sanglina

sanglina

Senior Member
#8
Jul 28, 2012
857
4
0
#8
Poopsiemom said:
I am going through a divorce and lost custody of my two kids. It is because he claims I abuse my kids. Something I would never do, but yet it was my word against his and since I have a mental illness...I lost the battle. I would hope that joint custody would be awarded so we could co parent our two boys, but that didn't happen. These two boys are my whole world. I wanted these two so much and went through hard pregnancies to have them. They are truly my gift from God! I pray each night for them. But I am angry at God for taking my gifts away. I get two hours a week with them. Right now, my youngest is sick and I can't be there for him. I pray for guidance, but yet I am angry at God for taking my kids away from me. My soon to be ex-husband was verbally abusive and I stayed to protect the kids. I guess. It was not a smart idea. But I didn't believe in divorce and didn't think he would do this to me after 21 years of marriage. I tried so hard to be the good mom and wife. With my illness...it was a struggle.

I guess what I want to know is...is it ok to mad at God for this? I pray for guidance and protection for my boys and healing for my little one who is sick. I am just angry that I can't even call to check on him. I am so worried.
Click to expand...
My heart goes out to you <3. I just hope and pray that things will work out fine and that you get the chance to spend more time with your kids.
 
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intercessorginger

Guest
#9
#9
I wonder why you blame God and accuse him of "taking your kids away." Wasn't it actually your husband and the courts that did that? Since God is your Father a loves you so much, why would he want to cause you this pain. He is the best friend we could ever have in life..the only one who died for us. Cast your cares onto him he cares for you!
 
K

kessy001

Guest
#10
#10
May the Lord give you wisdom and peace. Be strong, God is still with you and He has your best interest at heart. Trust and Rejoice in His plans for you. Shalom.
 
J

Jenjoy

Guest
#11
#11
it's OK to be angry with at least you know he's still listening. Eventually the anger will stop. Please seek outside help. Praying for you.
 
J

Jordache

Guest
#12
#12
Whether or not God deserves it is out of the question. The fact is we are emotional beings and to deny that is wrong. Certainly you shouldn't be mad at God, but you are. Hiding it will never accomplish anything. You can let God know you're mad at Him as long as you are working on it.
 
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danschance

Guest
#13
#13
Popsiemom

&#8220;Never! Can a mother forget her nursing child?
Can she feel no love for the child she has borne?
But even if that were possible,
I would not forget you!
Isaiah 49:15

I can't imagine the pain you must feel. Nothing could hurt a mother worse than this. You have my complete sympathy and I hope it all works out. It is only natural to be angry about this but is it OK to be angry with God? I can't say. The only thing I know for certain is that God did not take your children from you. You can blame the soon to be Ex-husband for that. He is the one who lied in court. It is very natural, normal and healthy to be angry over this but un-forgiveness is always wrong. God understands how you feel and He knows the pain you feel.
 
T

texan4Jesus

Guest
#14
#14
I'm praying for you. My heart goes out to you. Be strong & trust in the Lord.
 
A

allabouthim

Guest
#15
#15
Hi, I'm sorry for what you are going through. I just lost custody of my child to an adulterous spouse who abandoned his family 7 years ago. The family court system is a perfect example of why God calls the civil courts the unrighteous or the "unjust" (1 Cor 6). I was dumbfounded by the unethical way the system works. You're right it really boils down to your word against theirs. There is no burden of proof like in a normal court of law. Our children are victimized by the money making scandal of the "family" courts.

I have a couple of questions before I can give you proper biblical counsel. Which one of you filed for divorce? Is this a first marriage for both of you?
 
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juanpablo

Guest
#16
#16
What kind of mental illness you have.

Being mad at God is keeping you away from healing. Pray, do not stop, keep praying and the doors will open. I will pray for you.
 
H

herbalforager

Guest
#17
#17
wow as I read your story, I thought I was the one writing it. God is amazing. I have been through loosing my boys, but after 7 weeks of not being able to see them, I got custody. Praise God. Pray, Pray Pray. Get rid of your anger and pain. It is so hard, but Christ Jesus is my Hero now and will never and has never left you alone. Lean on Christ alone. When you get mad and don't understand how this happened. Just call to Him, tell Him you need help and He will come and pick you up. Even when you feel sad, shameful and stuck. God can heal all of your pain. Ask Him to give you compassion and love for your accusers and your enemies!!! That is praying His will. Blessings and Love to you. Praying for you right now! Peace and Joy. You will find strength in that.
 
B

Blackson

Guest
#18
#18
Honestly, it is not true to be mad at God, and at the same time you pray to Him. I do not support what your husband has done at all, but I do encourage you to first repent and tell God I was unreasonably mad at you for something that is not your fault. However, God understands why you become mad at him, and no one else can have that understanding. Then tell God (in your newly reformed friendship) what your problem is. We can help you pray over the issue, but if your attitude towards God remains that way, nothing can be achieved my dear. Co-parenting is a necessity where there is protection, love and peace for all of you as a family. But my understanding is that there is abusive environment in your house. Do not allow your children to grow up in such environment. I suggest we just pray that the husband should bring your children to you as a mother since they are still young.
 
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