friendly advice

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Knightj33

Guest
#1
#1
I have friend I'll call her Ms. D we have been friends now for a few years. Recently her oldest daughter had been helping me out with babysitting my kids before and after school to make a little extra money. Recently a mutual friend of mine and Ms. D's has been letting me know about how fortunate I am to be paying her so little and I thank God everyday for her being there to help me but financially I truly can not afford to pay her more. Now Ms. D nor her daughter have ever come to me and ask for a"raise" but now I'm having to loose work because she seems to not be able to babysit on Fridays anymore. I hate to loose a friendship over money but I don't see any other option but to find a sitter I can rely on. Am I acting as a good Christian person by doing so this ? I have been praying over this now for a few days and would welcome any advice as how I can save my friendship.. God bless
 
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niceguyJ

Senior Member
#2
Feb 5, 2011
520
25
28
#2
My advice would be to sit down with both of them and say what you just said here. Be honest with them and let them know what is going on and how you feel. Then take it from there.
 
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Ugly

Guest
#3
#3
There is nothing 'unchristian' about doing what needs to be done to take care of your family. If the person you have been relying on is not working out any longer, there's nothing wrong with replacing them with someone who can do what you need. Its not even a 'Christian' issue.
Modern American Christianity has messed many people up by thinking that politeness is the centerpiece of faith. Not saying no to people. Never being rude or assertive, and that's just not true. There is nothing wrong with these things if need be. Not saying we should never care about being rude, but there are times it happens and that's fine.
And its not even rude to replace someone who's not meeting your needs. Friend or not. It has no bearing on your walk whatsoever.
Though i do agree with Nice, sit down and talk with this woman, see if it can be worked out. But if not, then if you need someone that fits your needs, just let her know that you'll have to start looking for someone who can. Doesn't have to be a mean thing, it can all be done nicely and pleasantly.
 
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Indubitably

Guest
#4
#4
Niceguy nailed it. A sit down is in order. She may not know what you assume she knows and you can negotiate. Get it from the source. Mutual friends are not always mutual.
 
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Aqua_Girl09

Guest
#5
#5
I think I'd find some one else that would be willing to watch the kids first. Just in case she says no. i mean you should sit down and be honest but if she decided "no i'm not going to do it anymore" then you should have someone on back up who could. Or just kinda slide it in there that if she can't do it at the original price then you've found someone else who can. DON'T tell her how much. just that you've found some one else. but you'd RATHER she do it because you like the way she is with your kids.

its a business deal. but a "Christian" matter. ^_^. i mean the bible also said it was ok to have slaves and to discipline your children. do you think all the kings got rich from being "nice"? NOPE! they were FAIR. and thats what you need to do. if you can't pay her more then you can't. its her right to stop working for you and if shes wants to she will. you're not forcing her. >_>
 
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