Thank you for all of your comments, it was actually 4 months ago that he came to me and my daughter (15yo his stepdaughter) and told us he was leaving. He came back a month later after an atty told him to go back home and told me he wanted a divorce, and he no longer loved me. I stayed up until 2 days ago, during those 3 months, he didn't speak to me or the kids the whole time. When my daughter cried to him "you are the only father I have, please talk to me" he responded with "I'm sorry, I cant talk to you, I have to protect myself" (in his mind, for court I assume) but she became extremely depressed and before he left for a week, he told me he hated this family, I was so angry that I kicked a microwave that was laying on the floor that he was so concerned about (but not us) and he than used that stupid action of mine (which I regret) and called the police on me hoping to get an upperhand in divorce or something. They made him leave and he chose to stay gone for a week rather than a day, he never contacted us, during that time, the faucet broke and I had to turn off the main water cause I didn't know what to do and he was nowhere to be found. I than determined it was too damaging for the kids and I to be around that atmosphere and for the last year, he locked me from all access to any money. It was getting pretty rough for all of us and I knew I needed to heal for awhile. I thought a break might be necessary, but I was than given divorce papers.
I really don't have the upper hand, I don't think. I feel like it's all his moves, I just sit back and watch him destroy us all for whatever reason. I truly feel that the devil has a strong hold on him. this is not the man I knew. its so sad, and I just wonder, at what point, would God want us to move forward? I never wanted any of this. I am just lost.