Marriage to prevent sexual sin?

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J

JSZie_91

Guest
#21
RUN for your life!!!!!!

Not only should you break up with him, but you should alert Pastoral Elders or a trusted pastor over the sin you share and repent asap and also what he is asking of you. In order to obtain the honour of serving in church with the goal of being in some form of leadership position (which all men are in anyway), men need to meet the character qualities of 1 Timothy 3:

Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4 He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full[ respect. 5 (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?) 6 He must not be a recent convert, or he may become conceited and fall under the same judgment as the devil. 7 He must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil’s trap. 8 In the same way, deacons are to be worthy of respect, sincere, not indulging in much wine, and not pursuing dishonest gain. 9 They must keep hold of the deep truths of the faith with a clear conscience. 10 They must first be tested; and then if there is nothing against them, let them serve as deacons.

This is the standard of all male leaders, and since in Hebrews 13:7 tells church members to imitate their leaders, this list of behaviour is held for all men in the church, and your boyfriend fails miserably at this test. He has already cheated his future wife (which you do not hold title to and might never), hes preaching a false doctrine with his outward behaviour when his heart is thinking evil, and he is sexually abusing you by expecting intimate privileges of marriage without having earnt anything by being faithful to Gods standards.
I will run away from him sis and contact Pastor at my hometown which i can trust to discuss about this..Because I cannot act myself and need someone to guide me like you sis and other. Yes, i don't want my life to be worsen..I want to grow in faith in Jesus Christ and to concern with the God standard of all male leader.. and improving myself to meet God standard for Christian lady..TQ and God Bless.
 
J

JSZie_91

Guest
#22
RUN for your life!!!!!!

If you marry him, your life will not improve but worsen. And by seeking marriage just to justify sexual sin is the worlds worst proposal and you should be deeply insulted. Break up with him and continue your education and get some counselling re your sin from someone trusted in your church.

yes, i now realise i deeply insulted with this worlds worst proposal ever..and will definately follow your advice to get some counselling.

And above all else, ask the Holy Spirit for conviction on your behaviour so you can effectively pull the plug on this relationship and sin.
I start praying now and waiting for Holy Spirit for conviction on anything I need to do:)
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#23
Very happy to hear the decision you've made, and i'm sure you've made God happy and pleased as well.
 
S

shekaniah

Guest
#24
After reading all the posts...I think you have made a good choice.
I just want to say; you have my prayers for strength and wisdom.
God bless you and keep you!
In His Service, Shekaniah
 
H

Hebrey

Guest
#25
Well, I have the experience, that if a pair of people starts doing sex once, it is very very difficult to stop it. It is not enough to know you should stop. In some cases, marriage might be solution. In some cases it is even biblical solution. But I agree with athers, who already wrote before me, your boyfriend does not love you. He tries to make you to do things just for his good and be very dominant and misusing you. I agree with others, the only way for you is to run from him, because once you would marry him, this his character might become even worse.
 
C

CC_Bride

Guest
#26
Thanks for reminding me with biblical verse from 1 Chorinthians 13: 4-8, reminding me of how love should be..realize that what I have is out of way. Also, u make me realize the marriage things 'now we can make it ok' will never work.. I think i don't want to discuss with marriage counselor (because i will not married with him anyway) but straight to Pastor that I trust to ask what should i do to win God's heart back, Also on how to prevent me from doing silly sin anymore..TQ so much ,God Bless
Praise the Lord!
 
Oct 20, 2011
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#27
it's kinda a balancing act in my opinion. You don't want to marry a bum. You don't want to marry a rich arrogant egotistical prick either. What you want is someone who makes good money, but isn't egotistical about it. Like a veterinarian or something. Someone that loves and appreciates there work. But doesn't work endless hours were you'll never see them. Marry someone you love not someone for there money. So if you love him marry him. Sex before marriage in this day and age is virtually unavoidable. Everyone has felt what you're feeling. I've done that too. The ones that escape the average are so lucky.

Here's the problem, this old idea of marrying your high school sweetheart and somehow losing your virginity together on your honey moon night is such BS. As if that happens. What usually happens is is something ugly, sinful, regretful, terrible, or worse. I wish life wasn't like this, but it is.