I was talking to my sister last week and found out some heart breaking news. She didn't want anyone else to know, but shared it with me. My 13 yr old nephew was caught vaping. But far worse than that, he lied about it and hid it from his parents. His older brother was the one who told on him because he's a by the book kid. Once he told his parents and brought the vape out to them, the younger one denied it first, then confessed in tears. My sister said my oldest nephew went outside and cried for his little brother. Makes me cry just writing it.
So here is the deeper issue. They have a cousin on their father side who is adopted. He is a year older than my youngest nephew and he is hell on wheels. Because he is adopted his parents let him have and do whatever he wants. He's a big influence. He lives close to them and he's at their house about every other weekend. If they go anywhere, he's invited along. He's an only child so he spends a lot of time with my nephews. He was the one that got my nephew the vape pen or whatever it's called. My sister also said that he was sending dirty pictures on the phone to my youngest nephew. They live in a small town that is full of drugs.
Making everything more difficult is that my sister doesn't get along with her sister in law. Her SIL has a vile tongue and has said many things behind my sisters back to try and get her in trouble with the family and her own husband. She ever told her once that we, her family, didn't love her. Just anything cruel she can think to say or do to hit at my sister, she will do. She's known in the family as the one you don't cross because of the drama she causes. So my sister is left with the young cousin coming over and challenging my youngest nephew to do things he shouldn't. My nephew told me once that his aunt lets him watch movies his mother told him not to. smh
My youngest nephew is a follower and I fear so much for him. My sister has had a very unstable marriage, her husband has a horrific temper. She felt that she needed to stay married for the kids. But now, her husband won't stand up to his sister and tell her what her son is up to. They fear he's already been messing around with girls and porn. My brother in law already has a daughter from another marriage that got pregnant out of wedlock. She's divorced and on her second marriage and she's still in her 20s.
About a year ago my young nephew was having an issue with hoarding garbage. He would hide it under his bed. My mother found garbage he had pulled out of the can in the room he stays in at her place. I believe that was an issue with his parents unstable marriage. He's been on and off meds to help him focus and concentrate. I don't think he's on anything now. My sister says he doesn't have a good close friend. Too many drug addicted families in the area and he doesn't need that influence. My husband and I have always been close to the boys. I only have two nephews. We have taken them everywhere and they have always been perfect kids. It breaks out hearts that the youngest is having these issues. My husband is a smoker and has been trying to quit. He's often warned the boys to never start and told them how hard it is to stop. I want to reach out to him, but I don't want to hurt him or have him shut me out. My sister said he's been very clingy lately with her and when they came up to spend a week here, just the two of them, he was very clingy with me, hugging me, sticking close to me, laying on me when we sat on the couch. And that worries me because that makes me feel there is something deeper going on. I love him as my own son, but I'm seeing a change and it's not a good one. He may be coming up to visit this week and I don't know how I can reach out. He doesn't know that I know what he did. Sorry for the long post, but I wanted to add as many details as possible. If anyone has any ideas, I'd be happy to hear them. Thanks.