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Hello everyone. This is my second post and I hope I am placing it in the right area. If I am not. Forgive me -In time, I shall learn, I hope. LoL (Sorry for the long post)
Ok, so I am looking for Clarification or even Justification. If I am wrong in my thinking, The Lord please correct me and allow your saints to show me the way. I have no one else to ask. No believer around me. I thank God for you and your answer in advance. If you have scriptures, that I can use, I would appreciate it.
My question.
Is there a distinction between the Family of Believer and Non Believers? I am dealing with a problem from long ago with my mother. I struggle so much with this. She says she is a Christian. I have a hard time seeing this. I am trying to do right by her but I fear this battle within myself, I am losing.
My concerns I draw from. 1 Timothy 5 3-9
3 Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need. 4 But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God. 5 The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help. 6 But the widow who lives for pleasure is dead even while she lives. 7 Give the people these instructions, so that no one may be open to blame. 8 Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
9 No widow may be put on the list of widows unless she is over sixty, has been faithful to her husband, 10 and is well known for her good deeds, such as bringing up children, showing hospitality, washing the feet of the Lord’s people, helping those in trouble and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds.
My thought process:
Does this apply to my mother and what is my responsibility.
1. the dictionary describes a widow as: a woman who has lost her husband by death and has not remarried.
My mother has never been married. She has been in a live in relationship for over 43 years without marrying. She has 5 children, 2 have passed away. We all have different fathers and the man she has been with all of my life is no relation to any of us. Like I said, I struggle to see the Christian in her. The man she is with, raised me and my siblings from small children. He has taken care of my Mother. But I can not say they to have a Loving relationship. Today he says he's to old to marry and my mother says she never wanted him. She was pushed into the relationship by her sisters. If anything happens to him, My mother is put out on the street. No provisions have been made for her.
My mother has binded me to her with: She's going to leave him, She's not happy, She's living in Sin because they are not married. I've heard it all and I've watched opportunity after opportunity pass her by. If she really wanted to leave him she would and could have left long ago. I have tried to help her all of my life. I love her and still worry about her.
I have never been married. Before I found Christ, I had twins. I was saved two years after the birth of my children. I come from a long line of Christians. My mother and I use to go to church together. I wanted to hear and learn the Word she wanted to gossip about the Pastor and his Wife...and still does today. She would not stop. I could not go to church without her. I stopped going to church and I look for fellowship where ever I can.
When my children graduated from High School, I gave up my house and we moved in with my mother. She claimed she was losing her sight...and I knew it was my responsibility to see about her as her only living daughter. After I moved in and gave up everything..she told everyone I lied. She could see just fine. She makes it hard for us to move out.
My mother is an older woman and says she's a Christian, but boy a lot of hell followers her. In the Fall of last year she turned 74 years old and had to take an eye test to drive. I took her to the eye doctor who said she only 1 point away from being legally blind. He gave her glasses and an appointment for eye surgery. When we got to the DMV she would not give the lady the paperwork and the worker was to distracted and didn't hear mom mumble through the vision test. Lord help! she's a license driver without any restrictions. Oh and me, I'm a liar. The doctor was a quack who doesn't know what he was talking about and the papers I have are not hers. (I will not get her car fixed so she is not driving)
Last note.
My mother is always seeking attention. She likes to play sick a lot. Last year in April she finally had a Heart Attack. And after 35 years we heard, "I told you I was sick". Heart Attacks are not uncommon today and My mother was blessed more then she knows. The doctors said. A rare thing happened to her that he doesn't see often. She grew another ARTERY! The doctor's say's her heart is stronger, she has some problems but she can have a long life if she just take her meds, eat right and work out some. My mother says she is sick...She can't cook, can't clean, can't shop, can't do anything for herself..but it's not that she can't she just won't.
She can take care of herself. She bathes, Cooks breakfast for her and he live in boyfriend/my stepfather? everyday. She calls for his daily rides for his doctor's appointments...but everything else I handle. I can't get her up to do anything. I've been fighting this fight since I moved in. She tells everyone she does everything...but since her heart attack friend sand family are seeing that she lied there too. I am her maid and caretaker. She told me long ago, she did want any responsibility and as long as I was there, I was going to do everything. I think I have been paying for her bad choices for far to long. She chose this man. It is not my fault they have nothing to talk about and she doesn't want to sit with him. My mother has tried to make me Old before my time and my life has passed me by...And now, I just want to go back home.
I miss the PEACE and LOVE of my own house. No fighting, Lying. Just joy. Yeah problems came..but nothing like this in Moms house. I have an obligation to my mother. I don't think it's my time yet to take care of her. She is not alone and can do for herself. According to the word of Christ, would I be wrong if I moved out and let her do for herself. I'm not talking about abandoning her. I would come and see about her like I did before I moved in. But leave her to her day to day.
Please help me. This fight inside me has been going on for far to long.
Ok, so I am looking for Clarification or even Justification. If I am wrong in my thinking, The Lord please correct me and allow your saints to show me the way. I have no one else to ask. No believer around me. I thank God for you and your answer in advance. If you have scriptures, that I can use, I would appreciate it.
My question.
Is there a distinction between the Family of Believer and Non Believers? I am dealing with a problem from long ago with my mother. I struggle so much with this. She says she is a Christian. I have a hard time seeing this. I am trying to do right by her but I fear this battle within myself, I am losing.
My concerns I draw from. 1 Timothy 5 3-9
3 Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need. 4 But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God. 5 The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help. 6 But the widow who lives for pleasure is dead even while she lives. 7 Give the people these instructions, so that no one may be open to blame. 8 Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
9 No widow may be put on the list of widows unless she is over sixty, has been faithful to her husband, 10 and is well known for her good deeds, such as bringing up children, showing hospitality, washing the feet of the Lord’s people, helping those in trouble and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds.
My thought process:
Does this apply to my mother and what is my responsibility.
1. the dictionary describes a widow as: a woman who has lost her husband by death and has not remarried.
My mother has never been married. She has been in a live in relationship for over 43 years without marrying. She has 5 children, 2 have passed away. We all have different fathers and the man she has been with all of my life is no relation to any of us. Like I said, I struggle to see the Christian in her. The man she is with, raised me and my siblings from small children. He has taken care of my Mother. But I can not say they to have a Loving relationship. Today he says he's to old to marry and my mother says she never wanted him. She was pushed into the relationship by her sisters. If anything happens to him, My mother is put out on the street. No provisions have been made for her.
My mother has binded me to her with: She's going to leave him, She's not happy, She's living in Sin because they are not married. I've heard it all and I've watched opportunity after opportunity pass her by. If she really wanted to leave him she would and could have left long ago. I have tried to help her all of my life. I love her and still worry about her.
I have never been married. Before I found Christ, I had twins. I was saved two years after the birth of my children. I come from a long line of Christians. My mother and I use to go to church together. I wanted to hear and learn the Word she wanted to gossip about the Pastor and his Wife...and still does today. She would not stop. I could not go to church without her. I stopped going to church and I look for fellowship where ever I can.
When my children graduated from High School, I gave up my house and we moved in with my mother. She claimed she was losing her sight...and I knew it was my responsibility to see about her as her only living daughter. After I moved in and gave up everything..she told everyone I lied. She could see just fine. She makes it hard for us to move out.
My mother is an older woman and says she's a Christian, but boy a lot of hell followers her. In the Fall of last year she turned 74 years old and had to take an eye test to drive. I took her to the eye doctor who said she only 1 point away from being legally blind. He gave her glasses and an appointment for eye surgery. When we got to the DMV she would not give the lady the paperwork and the worker was to distracted and didn't hear mom mumble through the vision test. Lord help! she's a license driver without any restrictions. Oh and me, I'm a liar. The doctor was a quack who doesn't know what he was talking about and the papers I have are not hers. (I will not get her car fixed so she is not driving)
Last note.
My mother is always seeking attention. She likes to play sick a lot. Last year in April she finally had a Heart Attack. And after 35 years we heard, "I told you I was sick". Heart Attacks are not uncommon today and My mother was blessed more then she knows. The doctors said. A rare thing happened to her that he doesn't see often. She grew another ARTERY! The doctor's say's her heart is stronger, she has some problems but she can have a long life if she just take her meds, eat right and work out some. My mother says she is sick...She can't cook, can't clean, can't shop, can't do anything for herself..but it's not that she can't she just won't.
She can take care of herself. She bathes, Cooks breakfast for her and he live in boyfriend/my stepfather? everyday. She calls for his daily rides for his doctor's appointments...but everything else I handle. I can't get her up to do anything. I've been fighting this fight since I moved in. She tells everyone she does everything...but since her heart attack friend sand family are seeing that she lied there too. I am her maid and caretaker. She told me long ago, she did want any responsibility and as long as I was there, I was going to do everything. I think I have been paying for her bad choices for far to long. She chose this man. It is not my fault they have nothing to talk about and she doesn't want to sit with him. My mother has tried to make me Old before my time and my life has passed me by...And now, I just want to go back home.
I miss the PEACE and LOVE of my own house. No fighting, Lying. Just joy. Yeah problems came..but nothing like this in Moms house. I have an obligation to my mother. I don't think it's my time yet to take care of her. She is not alone and can do for herself. According to the word of Christ, would I be wrong if I moved out and let her do for herself. I'm not talking about abandoning her. I would come and see about her like I did before I moved in. But leave her to her day to day.
Please help me. This fight inside me has been going on for far to long.
.