The One Word That Can Shred Your Family to Pieces

[ChristianTonyB]

The One Word That Can Shred Your Family to Pieces


The other day, I was led in prayer by a ministry leader with several other people in attendance. The focus was on our commitment to the Lord, a worthy subject, no doubt.



However, there was one part of the prayer that I was not in agreement with. I will quote it the best I can:



"Lord, we are willing to leave ANY relationship if it is pushing us away from you."



While this sounds reasonable, I am not sure God would agree. I go back to what Jesus said in Mathew 19:8:



He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so."



We have to assume that Jesus also talked about wives divorcing their husbands. Our Lord and savior states it pretty clearly here:



"Everyone who divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery, and the one who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery." Luke 16:18



So, for those women bent on playing "musical husbands," all because they cannot seem to find the perfect one, they will be held to account.



I already know the rebuttal coming my way:



Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 2 Cor. 16:14



You can always count on this being the ONE verse that every young wife in the church has memorized. This is her trump card. If that no-good husband of hers doesn't start proving that he can rise to everyone else's expectations, she will play her hand.



For example, according to every pastor in North America, he needs to:

• Provide, not just a little, but everything our society says we all need to have. Not only that, but what everyone else in the church has as well.
• Be a perfect husband, period.
• Be a perfect father, period.
• Be a perfect disciple of Christ, despite the church doors being locked 166 hours out of each week.
• Be the rock of the family, despite having little support from anyone in the church.

Be, be, be. And if you are not, the implicit message to your wife is:



"It's okay, honey, you can leave him. He probably isn't really a Christian, anyway."



As one who has been on the receiving end of having my family ripped to shreds, I am begging for ministry leaders to go quiet. Just stop talking already!



Think about what you are truly saying before you say it. In my example above, the word ANY can have devastating consequences.

I'm not sure what kind of ministry leader you are talking about, but if he is a pastor or teacher he certainly needs to be pulled up. You can use Matthew 19 vs 29 as your proof. You'll note Jesus omits any reference to a husband or wife in His comment.

As far as limply excuses for justifying a divorce is concerned, the world and even some church folk have seized on those, but the true, intelligent, self respecting and God fearing Christian won't fall for them.

 

[Nehemiah6]

"Lord, we are willing to leave ANY relationship if it is pushing us away from you."

If this was said primarily to address conflicts within marriages, then it is silly and uncalled for. And if husbands and wives are being exhorted, then there must be a balanced message which includes both.

 

[ChristianTonyB]

If this was said primarily to address conflicts within marriages, then it is silly and uncalled for. And if husbands and wives are being exhorted, then there must be a balanced message which includes both.

Yes. I agree.

I suspect it wasn't given in that context though. I would like to think, like others have suggested, that the context meant by the prayer giver is probably different to the interpretation of it by the OP. And that's understandable if you've been 'injured' by an unfaithful spouse. Sounds like the OP still has hurts he has yet to be healed of, and that's understandable too.

 

[SteveEpperson]

I'm not sure what kind of ministry leader you are talking about, but if he is a pastor or teacher he certainly needs to be pulled up. You can use Matthew 19 vs 29 as your proof. You'll note Jesus omits any reference to a husband or wife in His comment.

That's interesting, I never noticed that.

As far as limply excuses for justifying a divorce is concerned, the world and even some church folk have seized on those, but the true, intelligent, self respecting and God fearing Christian won't fall for them.

I agree. Thank you for your response.

 

[SteveEpperson]

f this was said primarily to address conflicts within marriages, then it is silly and uncalled for. And if husbands and wives are being exhorted, then there must be a balanced message which includes both.

I honestly believe this was an honest mistake on the part of the prayer leader. I think they were trying to convey that the brand new believers among us should ditch their old friends who are holding them back from seeking God's truth. However, there are those who will take the word ANY to mean husband or wife. That's what I am concerned with here.