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B
Worrying is a waste of thought. What if this goes wrong or that goes wrong? So what if it does. It's your love for each other and for God that really matters right? You'll have a chance to laugh about the mistakes later if they happen. And if not you have a wonderful wedding. Either way is a good deal. You're getting married! That's a good thing.
N
Yeah I just always pictured my wedding perfect and then today this morning the venue for the reception said they dont have any openings for that day when last month they had already booked us. My fiance is over seas right now and im doing this by myself! I swear I have gray hairs from this and arg!! I love ny fiance but sometimes I wish we could jhst do the marriage without the dang wedding.
B
Yeah. If you're booked then they should keep you booked. They were probably bribed. Anyway I'm right along with you about being angry at all the supposed necessities of a culturally proper American wedding ceremony. If it is this much hassle, maybe you should consider having only your closest friends and family do it in your local church or in your house if you really want it cheap and easy. The option is always there for you to elope. You DO have choices, you only bind yourself by what you want. Culturally speaking it's more up to you than your husband anyway.
I think it would be normal to worry about the wedding because you want it to perfect what matters most is that your are ready to be married because if thinks are going wrong your future wife probably is more upset about han you because this is probably something she has thought about everytime she has been to a wedding
P
Honey, you poor thing!
As someone who eloped...I highly recommend it!
My daughter was married in June, and it was a big church wedding/traditional reception, because her husband wanted it. She was doing great, knowing it was just a day that began a whole life. Till the day of the ceremony, when I found her in the church bathroom sobbing, trying to reapply her makeup for the third time. "Mom! I'm late *sob*, and this new makeup won't go on right *sob*, and I just want to look good for my husband *sob*, and every one is waiting for me *sob*, and I *sob*... don't *sob*... want *sob*... to do *sob*... thiiiissss!! *plaintive wail*
God was good, and gave me the right words to talk her down, and she enjoyed the day, but, oh! the stress!
And she and her husband planned the whole thing together, so...alone? You poor baby!
I don't want to say, go against the wishes of your family, but if you and your fiancé feel it would be better to do things differently...he's the one you need to please, not your family. It will be like this for the rest of your life, dearest. Your folks have to get used to it. (she said, reminding herself!)
If you choose this path, please do not hesitate to ask for help. Your parents, siblings, and bridesmaids could/should do this. Tell them you cannot do it alone. Especially your family--if they want this. Writing checks is easy, but the legwork is not!
That's my two cents (which isn't worth much). But I will surely be in prayer for you, little one.
Be of good courage! It won't last forever (though it may seem that way).
~ellie
xo
As someone who eloped...I highly recommend it!
My daughter was married in June, and it was a big church wedding/traditional reception, because her husband wanted it. She was doing great, knowing it was just a day that began a whole life. Till the day of the ceremony, when I found her in the church bathroom sobbing, trying to reapply her makeup for the third time. "Mom! I'm late *sob*, and this new makeup won't go on right *sob*, and I just want to look good for my husband *sob*, and every one is waiting for me *sob*, and I *sob*... don't *sob*... want *sob*... to do *sob*... thiiiissss!! *plaintive wail*
God was good, and gave me the right words to talk her down, and she enjoyed the day, but, oh! the stress!
And she and her husband planned the whole thing together, so...alone? You poor baby!
I don't want to say, go against the wishes of your family, but if you and your fiancé feel it would be better to do things differently...he's the one you need to please, not your family. It will be like this for the rest of your life, dearest. Your folks have to get used to it. (she said, reminding herself!)
If you choose this path, please do not hesitate to ask for help. Your parents, siblings, and bridesmaids could/should do this. Tell them you cannot do it alone. Especially your family--if they want this. Writing checks is easy, but the legwork is not!
That's my two cents (which isn't worth much). But I will surely be in prayer for you, little one.
Be of good courage! It won't last forever (though it may seem that way).
~ellie
xo
R
I've been married for about a year and a half now and I still feel like I'm going to have a panic attack when I even THINK about the wedding. I have never been so completely stressed in my entire life and it was honestly a totally miserable experience. It's so stupid and unnecessary. I'm not sure it's possible to have fun at those things unless someone planned it ALL for you and they had an unlimited budget.
Elope.
The marriage is more important than the wedding.
Elope.
The marriage is more important than the wedding.
N
They are trying to help (My family) but they are in cali and I am in VA and they are gonna fly down for the wedding.
Ellie thank you, I am going to talk to my fiance see what he thinks and go from there. I think im gonna marry with the court and then eventually plan a SMALL wedding.. I just dont know how my family would react to it.
Ellie thank you, I am going to talk to my fiance see what he thinks and go from there. I think im gonna marry with the court and then eventually plan a SMALL wedding.. I just dont know how my family would react to it.
S
Do what you can...
Ask for help when you can...
But most of all...
On your wedding day...don't focus on how things turned out!!!
You might get dissapointed...
Instead focus on the man you love and just married!!!
You both will have a special day because of the love you share!!!
It is not about the wedding...it is about your future together...
Start it out relaxed and just go with what ever happens.
Don't forget to smile! It is the most beautiful thing you could put on that day!!!
Payers sent for you and your future Husband...
In the Loving Name of Jesus, Amen
Ask for help when you can...
But most of all...
On your wedding day...don't focus on how things turned out!!!
You might get dissapointed...
Instead focus on the man you love and just married!!!
You both will have a special day because of the love you share!!!
It is not about the wedding...it is about your future together...
Start it out relaxed and just go with what ever happens.
Don't forget to smile! It is the most beautiful thing you could put on that day!!!
Payers sent for you and your future Husband...
In the Loving Name of Jesus, Amen
R
Elope and ask someone to set up a party FOR you.
I mean if it's supposed to be YOUR day then why are YOU doing all the work? lol makes no sense.
I was in the same situation. Everyone wanted to 'help' but they were all far far away so I got stuck doing the stressful bits and they all showed up like little rays of sunshine the day of in their perfectly pressed outfits and perfect hair just ready to party. I still find it difficult to speak to some of them lol
I mean if it's supposed to be YOUR day then why are YOU doing all the work? lol makes no sense.
I was in the same situation. Everyone wanted to 'help' but they were all far far away so I got stuck doing the stressful bits and they all showed up like little rays of sunshine the day of in their perfectly pressed outfits and perfect hair just ready to party. I still find it difficult to speak to some of them lol
its suppost to be the most wonderful time of your life. why is it so stressful, unlessyour doing all the work your self. if its the case them i suggest to sare the responsability with the groom. Oh wait that will add more stress never mind. Enjoy it make it fun for your self. Let Jesus do the worring
N
Why cant you all just come here and help me plan. I know no one out here my family is out of town. My fiance is over seas. My family help with the money I am not paying for anything. Which takes a lot of stress off me but I am not the kind of person who organozes things its rediculous how bad I am at this.. I just wish I could have one person helping a little. Idk im going crazy. Tomorrow dress shopping the person who is going with me is my husbands boSses wife and shes barely a friend but shes all I have.. Arg and I loathe dresses.. I am so not the fairy tale princess type
...
...
P
I'm pretty sure you don't want to do this, but my sister-in-law was married in a while ladies' tux!
She wouldn't say a word to anyone beforehand...she wanted it to be a surprise. And it was!
She was in her 40s, it was her second marriage, and she's 5' 11"...model gorgeous.
No one I can think of but her could have pulled it off.
I'll keep you both in prayer, Nini.
Every bride is the most beautiful lady there, because the radiance of her joy cannot be matched.
The joy of two becoming one...it's positively inspirational! Every married woman there gets teary just looking at you.
~ellie
She wouldn't say a word to anyone beforehand...she wanted it to be a surprise. And it was!
She was in her 40s, it was her second marriage, and she's 5' 11"...model gorgeous.
No one I can think of but her could have pulled it off.
I'll keep you both in prayer, Nini.
Every bride is the most beautiful lady there, because the radiance of her joy cannot be matched.
The joy of two becoming one...it's positively inspirational! Every married woman there gets teary just looking at you.
~ellie
